gut-wrenching fear

many of you may remember when i wrote about the new guy i'm dating. everything has been wonderful since that first kiss... beyond my imagination.

BUT... there has to be a BUT, right?

he's been having some abdominal pain, and it turns out, there is a mass on his pancreas.

not good - the ultrasound showed it was 2 cm.

so then he had to have a ct scan, which he did a week and a half ago.

the doctor called to see him at 5:30 this afternoon. i will be going in with him.

i know i have to be strong, and i will be strong, but right now... RIGHT NOW... i'm a wreck. i am so afraid. i've lost three people i care about to pancreatic cancer. i will try desperately not to let him see my fear.

the clock is not moving, and my tears keep falling. i don't know who else to talk to......

As an oncology nurse I see your fears all the time.  Sometimes they are just, sometimes not.  Try to keep your head up and stay strong.  My thoughts are with you.

Oh Sal. I am so sorry you have to do this. Try to be strong and we are here for you to vent when you need it.

Holding you in my thoughts and prayers for strength for you and for healing and wellbeing for him. Just take one moment at a time. Big hugs!

Sal, I will keep you both in my thoughtd and prayers. If you need anything or to vent we are here!

Jeff

Keeping you both in my thoughts and prayers that the outcome will be positive and that whatever happens that you both have to strength to get through it together!

~Kristina

I'm sending positive thoughts and well wishes your way......

I think the best way to approach this is think of yourself as his "rock"
Be strong for him
If the news turns out to be bad, he'll be in shock to some degree. He'll need support and someone who can listen, take him to dr appts, etc...By fulfilling this role, you might be able to work through the fear and really be there for him
Best wishes to you both
Greg