Mabuhay from the Philippines (Long post... Sorry)

Man, I feel so old now.  In February, I celebrated my 34th birthday.  Then, on March 19, I celebrated my second re-birthday.  I can still remember coming to this website and to these boards before my surgery and just wondering what the next few years may have in store for me.  I read other people's thoughts and ideas, just trying to get a glimpse or an idea of what lay on the other side.  Then, that day, and I was there.  And, when I think back on the last two years, its like looking across a chasm of unbelievable proportions.

 

My life has completely changed in every way imaginable.  I take a very passive approach towards my diet now.  Food no longer controls me, but I also have no desire to control it.  I have never kept diaries or counted calories.  I simply eat when I'm hungry and don't when I'm not.  I look at food normally now; not as something that needs to be controlled or dwelt upon all that much.  I've developed a pattern of eating that works for me.  I don't over-think it; and I don't overdo it.

 

My stomach capacity has, after more than two years, remained pretty low.  I can usually put down the equivalent of one chicken wing's worth of food in one sitting.  I've never had a problem with sugar and eat chocolate and candy (I've developed a love affair with Mentos), I just don't eat every last piece available.  I have learned to put down that bag or fork or plate or cup when I feel myself nearing capacity, then I go and do something else.  It must be a product of my Catholic upbringing; everything is okay, just not in excess.

 

Early on, I knew the mental changes I would have to make would be more important than anything physical I'd have to do.  I read some early blog posts of mine, just for the hell of it, and part of one stood out to me-

 

"I really don't have any hunger cravings.  My partner last night made scrambled eggs and croissants.  They smelled so damn good and I enjoyed the smell.  But I was able to disassociate that with eating and enjoy it without craving them.  If I do crave something, I just picture the mess that my stomach is right now, and the craving runs away.

I've been out and about quite a bit.  I've been living life normally, shopping and visiting, and just enjoying this month long paid vacation I have.  I've been extremely conscious whenever we go out, thinking, 'This is the point where we used to go to get something to eat.'  And I recognize that.  We weren't getting something to eat because we were hungry.  We were going because it was something to do.  So, we do something else."

 

Those lines were written on 24 March 2007, and to this day still apply.

 

I do keep, deep in the recesses of my mind, an awareness that I could stray from this mental conditioning.  However, here in the Philippines, the lifestyle I lead should only contribute to further success.  I no longer own a car; nor do I need one.  And I'll be happy never to own a car or experience any of its headaches again.  If I need to get cross barangay, I walk.  If I need to go cross-town, I ride a jeepney.  If I need to go cross province, I hop on a bus.  I walk to the store, to the market and to the beach.  And the food here is much healthier than back in the states.  For lunch yesterday, I had a dish called tinola, a chicken soup with pepper (or malungay) leaves and papaya slices.  Most dishes are served over white rice.  It's fantastic, as is a diet with further staples such as fish, lean pork and mixed-steamed vegetables.

 

Weight loss surgery in the Philippines is almost unheard of, especially outside of Manila.  Seeing the general populace, it's easy to see why.  The incidence of obesity among Filipinos is very low, owing to their active lifestyles more than their relatively low incomes.  I have been interviewed by doctors and nurses who have been fascinated by my x-rays and little scars as much as my dad's huge heart bypass surgery scar.

 

We stopped at a police checkpoint in Makati not too long ago and the cop wondered if I was in movies (just a little self-gloss there.)

 

Well, a long update that was a long time coming.  I still lurk the boards regularly, but now that I'm a little more settled, I'll post more.  I've updated my profile with some new blog entries (mostly imported from previous forum posts) and many old and new pictures.

 

Keep up the good work!  Sige na!

 

From the other side of the surgery and the other side of the world,

 

Chris

 

P.S.- Can I be y'all's official GLBT-raised in the South-residing in the Philippines-WLS Ambassador?  Unless there already is one...

Hi Chris... Wow... what a wonderful post. I thoroughly enjoyed every word of your journey and your testament to the notion that there may come a day when life is not all about weight loss. I am enjoying the process I am in now but it seems hyperfocused for me right now and although I accept that as being there I need to be (only 6 months postop), it is heartening to think that the hypervigilence may calm down and life can be more about other things.

Life there sounds sweet. I live in a large city and sometimes long for the slower pace and more natural environment. Please do post your experiences more and stay in touch.

And congratulations on the weight loss and finding the balance.

I think you'd look super hot in an ambassador's jacket! ... or not! *g*

Rest assured, one day it will no longer be about goals or numbers.  I used to be amazed whenever I put on my size 27 pants (always with a quick glimpse of the size label) but now, I don't even think about it.  I'm just same old-new and improved me.

BTW, I was hoping more for a platinum tiara and a sequined robe than a jacket.  Hehehe...  (Voice lowers an octave.)  It's just a joke.

Chris

Makes me think of the hubby and me on road trips. We eat cause we are board. We are having one this weekend and I am packing good snacks for me incase I do stray and snack. It's nice to know that I am not the only one who has been thru this.

Since Raven brought this up... You would look hot in what ever you want to wear.  
*I may be married but I'm not dead. LOL

Thanks for the compliment.  You're looking good there, yourself.  I may be gay, but I'm not blind.  And, good for you and your marriage.  Most married people I know died the day they returned from their honeymoons.

Anyway, the referenced thought sticks with me and is one of the principles of my life.  Eating as an extra-curriclular activity is dangerous and disasterous.  It was only when my head was saying, "I'm bored, let's eat," and my recently violated stomach replied, "Oh hell no," that I realized the difference between real physical hunger and mental cravings.  I've always been quite mental, but my stomach won that arguement and most others since.

LOL The first guy I was a hag for taught me tons. One of the things was beauty knows no sexuality. I can admit when I think a woman is beautiful and not feel like I should question if I am bi. Thanks for the complement.

Congratulations! You have done really well! I am about 5 and half  months out and about 15 pounds from goal.

Jeff

Great work, Jeff.  Looking good here, too.  Despite some setbacks and complications (which we've all had, I'm sure) the end result is worth it.  Wouldn't you agree?

I love it when success stories stop by to say hi.  Yay!  Awsome post, thanks for sharing.

Thanks, I look forward to reading more of your thoughts as well.