Introduction

Hi everyone.  Thought I would post a brief intro to say hello after mostly lurking on and off over several months.  Hope there's room here for a Canadian on the weight loss journey.  I'm just past four weeks out from lap RNY, which I had done out of country in the extremely capable hands of Dr. Graber and team at Faxton-St. Luke's in Utica, NY.  Superb care and experience overall.  Four weeks on, I'm struggling to get food down and keep it there, but hopeful that this phase will ease off.  The 14 incisions (yes, 14 - I was a handful for them) are healed and nearly disappeared and no other complications.  Just wish I could eat better and keep food down.

My journey is one of health, mobility and an easier life, not a quest for specific pounds.  Have done several programs in the past including Optifast when I lost 108 pounds in 12 weeks.... and regained it over the ensuing 1-2 years.  My gift to myself for my 50th birthday (last  month) was to rein in my health issues and make this drastic step.  I want 50 good years ahead of me.  That's after years of thinking about it of course, and then planning this since seriously since July 2008. 
So far I'm down about 42-44 pounds in the month since surgery (Feb 5th), and about 65 pounds overall since my consult with Dr. Graber in November 2008.  At about 404 lbs now, that leaves a very long road ahead as I probably need to get down another 200 pounds or so.

On the social side I have a great family, wonderful friends, and a career in health policy that I love. It involves a lot of travel and public speaking - one reason for wanting to move around more easily. I have been the super-chub side of a 10-year relationship with a high-performance athlete who loves my large size - so the weight loss choice is entirely mine and not the result of any external pressure.  Very sadly that relationship seems to be coming to an end but the rocky craziness of it (a long story for another day) pre-dates my surgical decisions and I believe is unrelated.  We are opposites in many ways - me being the superchub, Canadian, caucasian, reg. nurse, outgoing and more social half ... and he a former Olympic triathlete still very focused on his health and fitness, American, black, a surgeon, and much quieter and more serious type personality when in public.  

Can you say opposites?  I always knew a doc and a nurse was a toxic combo LOL.  Anyway along with too much physical weight, I have carried some heavy emotional crap around that challenging and often controlling relationship for a decade. Now I am being selfish and putting me, my life, and my health journey first.  Not that losing him is not tearing me apart, but eventually I guess we all make a decision when we are going to put ourselves first and give up trying to manage other peoples' craziness and baggage, eh?

OK, that's too much info but tells you a bit about me.  I live south of Ottawa, our nation's capital (home of the world's most enthused Obama fans!) on a big farm property. I'm looking forward to a lighter, easier life where I can get around this beautiful place a lot more easily.

Hope to participate in some of the chats here.  Cheers,

Mike

Hi Mike:

It's awesome that you are sharing such a personal story, with all the challenges that requires.  I'm sorry to hear you are having trouble keeping food down.

I totally understand your quest for easier mobility, and improved health.  I think that's what most of us want.  I also turned 50 in October last year, and that looming milestone was just one of the many reasons I decided to take this step.

You've done really well to have lost 44 pounds in one month!  I'm only down about 20 so far, but I have less to lose, and I know that everyone loses at a different rate.  I find that the exercise is difficult for me.  Not because I am physically unable, but because I live alone, and going for a walk by myself in the area I live in, just isn't that appealing to me.  I do have a Wii system, and haven't yet tried any of the activities on it.

I feel like this is a work in progress, and every day I learn something new.  I find it difficult to leave the house, and still get in the water and protein!  Travelling like you must do, would make it even more difficult.  Don't be too hard on yourself.  

I think most of us are emotional eaters, and that creates a big challenge for us after surgery.  Now we have to find ways to deal with the problems like stress, loneliness, and boredom, without using food.  We all have our baggage, and having friends to support us through this time is very helpful.  I've met some great people on this site, who I e-mail regularly.  I hear from them more than I hear from my own family!  Probably anyone who is going through this WLS journey, can relate to your story, and will be happy to support you in any way we can.

All the best,

Nancy

Thx for the loverly note, Nancy - very kind.  Looking forward to chatting with U and others here as time goes by.  Still struggling with the Week 4 "Graber" diet which is very basic soft stuff ... but my pouch does not seem happy with a lot of it.  Hoping strength and spirit pick up as this passes over time.  Ever hopeful....

Chat soon, thanks again for the welcome,

Mike

Hi Nancy,

I find my little dog the perfect excuse for walks.  Maybe you can borrow one?

Meg

Welcome to the GLBT board! If you have been lurking you already know what a supportive board this is--one of the best on OH!

I had my lap band surgery at age 63 because I just couldn't keep going the way I was. The loss has been slow but I can move and travel so much better that I am quite happy with it.

My partner had the band three weeks after I did, which certainly has helped with the journey. We just completed 23 years together!

Again, welcome and hope to see  you posting regularly!

Connie 

Thanks for the wonderful welcome Connie.  Look forward to chatting and following in the footsteps of folks like you and your partner.  Thanks again, cheers,

Mike

Welcome Mike!!! Thank you for sharing your story. It helps me so much to hear other people's journeys, not just with the weight loss but more importantly with the emotional and huge life changes that this decision brings. I'm 53 and understand what it's like to face the realities of mortality and morbidity which come with obesity. You are to be commended on your success with both the weight loss and the introspection. No do this is one thing... to understand yourself in the process is, what I believe, leads to ultimate success 2-5-10 years down the road. This is one of the reasons I love this forum so much. We are not just bragging about our weight loss successes (although we SURE do and joyfully) but we really tend to dig deep and ask the hard questions. Together we share this journey to help each other find our own unique answers. I'm glad you decided to join us. I look forward to your posts.

Thanks Raven, very kind.  Good to be part of a group with which I have some "extra" in common beyond the weight and WLS.  Looking forward to chatting, listening, and "digging deep."

Cheers,

Mike

Mike -

Congratulations on making such a life-changing decision--and for doing so with a clear head!  I know you will be successful.

Today is my two-year anniversary since surgery, and I have to say that I am loving life.  At the same time, I can remember being four weeks out from surgery and not being able to keep much of anything down.  The best suggestion that I can offer is to keep following the doctor's orders.  It's most likely irritating right now, but the situation will improve in time.  For example, I thought I would never get over being fatigued after surgery.  I think three or four months elapsed before I didn't have to take a power-nap in the middle of the day.  :-)

I am sorry to hear about the troubles in your relationship.  Having the surgery was a bit of a strain on my marriage, but we were able to make it through.  I hope there is a way that you can keep yours in tact, too.

Other than that, just enjoy the journey that you are on.  We have one life to live, and I think this is our opportunity to really get out there to live it.  You will see that life on the healthier side of the spectrum can be so much brighter.

Feel free to add me to your friends list, or don't hesitate to send me a private message if you need to talk about anything.  I would be more than happy to listen to you.

Wow, congrats on your amazing and successful journey Xavier.  A very kind note, much appreciated.  I need great role models like you.

I am indeed following the MD orders.  I tend to be fairly non-compliant in life - I assume it's the root of most of my success ... but in this instance believe me I'm commited to the program and doing what the team suggests.  I appreciate hearing that you took a while to recover cause my ass is just fried!  I am so de-energized.  I think once I can get some more real food in (and protein), that might help things.  Also my particular surgeon puts all patients on a beta blocker for a few weeks post op and that drug can suck the life out of ya.  So my own doc is weaning me off that now and I hope that will help too. 

It's also nice to chat with someone who shares other sometimes-challenging aspects of life and hope it will be OK for us to chat more in the future.  Thanks again for the loverly welcome.  Cheers from Canada where it is SUNNY today and I'm not freezing my A** off!!  LOL

Mike