Partner Freaking issues

So my partner is freaking out.  Afraid of me being thin, afraid that I wont want her.  She is also seriously concerned something bad is going to happen in surgery.  So much so she has been sabatoging our relationship to avoid dealing with the fears and talking about it.  I need her to be the rock right now as I am dealing with my own sets of fears!   She really doesnt want me to do it now.  I am taking her with me to support group tonight, I am really hoping that she will be able to see that this is the best healthiest choice for me.   Any ideas????

I am so sorry!!  I have a thin partner and she is very supportiive........LOL sometimes too supportive (nag!)  Just be yourself and patient and good luck!~Ann~

You know that was me 2 years ago when my partner had surgery. I was rally afraid he was going to leave me when he was thin. It took me some time to see the benefits and his life changing transformation. And of course, here I am today after lapband surgery. And... he loves his bear! I think the more you educate her, the better things will be.   -- Tom

As Tom just said, educate her hon. That is the best thing you can do. I was going through the same thing 2 years ago, and I backed out of going for the surgery cause I didn't have the support I needed. But now my "boyfriend" is supporting me 100% because I started having medical problems. He got scared that I could die. He went to the seminar and to my first appointment with my surgeon, and he'll go to support groups with me. Even though I finally have his support, I still feel he needs to be educated so he totally understands what I'm going through. The only problem I'm still having is he is afraid I'll leave our relationship. Our relationship isn't real solid, and I guess I can understand his feelings. Good Luck To You Hon...Your partner will come around and be there for you. She is just scared hon...it's only because she loves you!

I had a similiar situation with my partner.. Oh us women! But just educate and support.. That is all I can say. My partner was with me every step of the way. Orientation, the monthly support groups, and even OH.

We still struggle (I am six months out now) Every time I get smaller she freaks and says "You're MELING!!" I just keep letting her know she is my one and only! (oh yeah and big hugs go a long way!)

I am going through something similar, myself. I am scheduled to have surgery Oct. 18th and my partner supports me--but she doesn't think I should have the surgery. She came to my final appointment with me and has made it clear that she respects my decision and that it is my decision to make--but it terrifies her. I can't really blame her--it's scary!

She is worried, too, about my losing weight. She is going to try and lose it with me, but I'll obviously have extra help with the surgery! We just talk about it when we have to and love eachother a lot...now that it is getting so close, she is starting to get excited for me. She hasn't come out and said that she worries I'll leave her if I get thin...but I think that's part of it. I just think that reassurance over time will assuage those fears! Luckily, we have a strong relationship that can weather this.

I am starting to freak about a bit about my decision to have surgery, my surgery choice, etc.--but I know that it is the right thing for me and I am lucky that she is there to help me out!