Happy New Years...

Hello...it doesn't happen to often, but I have decided that it is time to post. On a daily basis, I read the posts in the forum at least two or three times a day. It has been a really interesting year. I have worked hard to maintain my weight, yet..nobody seemed to be very happy. Most people told me that I was too thin and too sickly looking. I, of course, didn't see it or believe it. I was concerned with a number that shouldn't have been so important. Sadly, hearing how sick I looked convinced me that I needed to put on a little weight. Can you believe it... time to gain weight!!! HATED THE THOUGHT!!!! Sadly, because I needed to add some weight, I ended up getting into old habits. I would gain a pound...hate myself for it..and punish myself with food. I have learned that I could eat anything.. pineapple...donuts...chips..etc. I would be careful of what ate...but I also ate the wrong things.. Needless to say...throughout the year... I gained five pounds. Hated myself even more...because of it...but in reality... I knew that I was healthier looking and healthier in general. Sadly, as the holiday times have approached, I allowed myself to enjoy family gatherings...traditional cooking...etc... If I step on the scale... I am about twelve pounds heavier then I want to be (actaully 20 pounds heavier then I want to be....)... Sadly though.. I am also at my healthiest. I hate the contridiction between what is best for my body..and the number in my head. Well, I have rambled enough... I hope to be better this year at responding and posting...and not simply reading.... HOWEVER........... I could really use some contact with others... Could really use the e-mails...and personal chats with others!!!!

Happy New Year to you as well Daniel, I've came to a somewhat similar -- although it has to do with more of how I look than how much I do or do not weigh. My church family has seen me dwindle for the past year and New Year's Eve I came to the realization that they have not only seen me dwindle a hundred pounds, they've also seen me PHYSICALLY CHANGE and yet in my minds eye -- I've kept the same vision of myself that I had BEFORE the surgery. Now, in 2008, 2 months before I'm a year out, I've reached the realization that I must replace that vision of the 286 pound me with the vision of the new me and get used to the evolution that has taken place and an evolution that is yet to be completed. Therefore, 2008, from a mental stand point, will be a new beginning for me. Now that we have lost weight or are losing weight -- we can't allow people to dictate to us in the same manner when we were over weight. We have always had the power and we must regain and keep that power that we grasped when we made the decision to have this surgery. Daniel, continue to develop your body, lose the weight and reach your desired goal -- you look great! People probably said, oh he looks sick or he's gonna die if he doesn't lose some of that weight -- and they're still talking. You can't please people and don't even try -- PLEASE YOURSELF --MAKE YOURSELF HAPPY and PROUD -- YOU ARE WHO MATTERS. We Love You and keep up the good work.

Happy New Year's to you too. Keep hanging out on the board and check in with us too. We can't support you if we don't know what you need. I've only been on this board a few months but I have found it really supportive. Take care and listen to yourself, not to friends or family. Connie

Daniel, Happy New Year, my friend. When reading your post, it was as if I had written it. I've gained about 10 pounds from my lowest and look better and feel better but still want to be at that lower weight just because.... You've been an inspiration to me and I want to thank you. We've chatted in the Men's board chat and I have your cookbook. Your story is inspirational. Are you still working with the trainer at the gym? Keep in touch. We love hearing from you. JM