ot: omfg, i'm going to STRANGLE her!!!!

ok i know you guys probably get sick of me *****ing about my girl, right? sorry... i just don't have anywhere else to vent. i know this isn't really the place but i don't have anywhere else online that's "just for me" and that she wouldn't be reading. so anywho, today is veteran's day and the school's are out so i scheduled a vacation day for today so i could be at home with my beautiful daughter. well now all of a sudden (since my daughter and i are at home and have plans to go to the skating rink) my gf thinks she's sick enough to come home from work. AAAAAARRRRRGGGGGGGGG!!!!!! she only does this when we're home and she isn't!! FUCK!!!! i just want some alone time, is that really too much to ask? why the crap does she always get sick when i'm sick or when i'm scheduled off? if i have a migraine, she gets sick and calls in. (and fyi, when i have a migraine i want to be ALONE!!!! in a cold dark quiet room and absolutely positively ALONE!!!!) when i was out of work several months ago from having my gall bladder removed and an internal hernia repaired (i was out for about 5 weeks) she tried to stay home or come home early almost every friggin' day!! i think that it's possible for me to be "in love" with her but GOOD GOD MAN! how the hell am i ever supposed to know if i don't ever have a chance to be ALONE and reflect on my life with her?? uggs!!! she gets on my damn nerves!!!

Take your daughter and run. This is ridiculous. Since she's "sick" she will have to stay home but you already have plans with your daughter so go do them! You should also tell her in no uncertain terms that when you have a migraine you need to be alone because noise and whatever other excuse you can think of makes them worse. Man, you just need to tell her to f*ck off. She's getting on MY nerves and I don't even know her!!

Sounds to me like shes afraid shes going to miss something....afraid you will do something without her.....and she feels threatened by your daughter....jealous maybe....i couldn't handle that ****i told allen anytime he needs alone time...to please tell me.....i know we all need time alone...... Just my opinion...but hope it helps.... And youre still SMOKING HOT girl Huggs Randy

wow. i know i was playing devil's advocate before, and saying maybe it was possible to be in love with her, but honestly, after reading all of your recent posts, even if you ARE in love, it certainly does not sound like a *healthy* relationship. i have a 5-yr old daughter, and my WIFE knows that it is absolutely necessary for us to have just some mama/daughter time once in a while. it doesn't sound like she's being intentional - just insecure and immature. have you had a chance to talk to her and tell her some of the stuff that you've been telling us? i really hope you can, because holding all that stress inside you is not good for any of you - i know from experience and don't fret about venting here. although i haven't been a part of this board very long, it was quickly obvious that we're all here to support each other. and i don't know about everyone else, but for me, not having a way to deal with this kind of stuff was part of the reason i ended up at 300 lbs and considering wls in the first place! and if you feel awkard continuing to do so, i'm sure there are many of us willing to talk via email, myself included... take care, xmasmama

OMG My hottie man husband does the same damn thing to me! I take a "me day" and he calls from work to come get him, he's sick. I call off work (sick for real) and he says, "Ya know, I had a sore throat yesterday too." & then he calls off. Drives me carzy!! Another thing he does is if I have an extra payday during the month, he finds a way to be off work (unpaid) so I can never get ahead with planning to catch up on things! I am in love with him, but man! He makes me insane sometimes!! Feeling ya in NY, ~April

I can relate so much and I've about reached my limit. I've been married over 30 years and it's been tolerable until lately. To make things worse now, we work at the same place, so we drive to work together, work together, shop together, etc. I have no alone time at all. She went to her parents for a week recently and I realized how much I'm missing. I need some freedom to do some "fun things". I made the mistake of telling her I was gay about 10 years ago and I've put up with snide gay remarks ever since. How long can this go on? I have been so discouraged about life lately and seem to be on a self-destructive course. If not for the love and understanding of one guy on this board, I don't think you'd be reading this right now. I've got so much support from the people on this board and it appears, so do you. If this is the only place for you to vent, I say, vent away. It's amazing how people on this board are supportive without ever meeting us and their experiences sure help us. I wish you the best. Just Me

Please do feel free to vent here. Go out with your daughter today just as you had planned--good idea. Sometime very soon you need to tell her you feel like you are suffocating. If she can't shape up, then its time to go.

Ok, I live alone and am not in in a long-term relationship, so I probably am not the best one to give advice. But all I can say is.....after reading about your situation, I am THANKFUL I am on my own instead of being in a relationship with someone as needy sounding as your GF. Somebody else mentioned jealousy, and I agree with them. This does not sound healthy. You don't need this. You need to seriously consider making a change with the relationship, for both you and your daughter's sake. Life is too short. Mental health is JUST, if not more, important as physical health and you've already made tough decisions to take control of your physical health. Now make those same tough decisions where your girlfriend is concerned so you can stay on top of your mental health. You alone have the power. You can do it. You will survive AND thrive. There is something better for you out there....you have to believe that. Best of luck to you. Jim

Oh I hear ya! She sounds like my first g/f! Drove me totally NUTSO! Feel free to vent and to set your boundaries. Have time with your daughter. I hope you did.

I think it's time for a little chat with the gf. You need to be honest with her but without hurting her feelings. There is nothing wrong about needing your space--it doesnt mean that your mad at her or that you don't like her anymore. Hopefully she'll understand without freaking. Life has probably changed a lot for you in the past several months. When we lose a lot of weight we change more than we realize, but our partners don't! What about making some plans after work with co-workers, or friends? take baby steps to get the seperation you need..perhaps then it wont be such a shock to her. Jen