New Member considering a revision---Scared to death--Sorry to change the topic
I guess I have to say this to the members because I am not able to say this to my friends and family. I was very excited at the thought of haveing my surgery revised. I did not really loose much weight the first go round, now I am looking to have a revision. I want to be balanced and not see the surgery as a cure all. I know from past experience that I will always be me thin or not. I know that life begins when I say it begins not just from being thin. I have been obese ALL of my life. I just read the memorial section and I am totally scared. I know the options are not good for me either way. I just really need to know that I have just scared myself and that death (though a very REAL possibility) is not the norm. I need to have this weight off of my body and soul. I am just really really scared. I don't mean to be a downer at all. I just want to know if I am being silly. I don't really have anyone else to turn to right now. My family is also scaring me. The funny thing is that I don't scare easily at ALL. I could use some support. Please. Thank you SO much.
First of all, let me say welcome to the board!!! Anytime most people read the memorial section, it causes some pretty strong emotions, heck, I had my surgery over two years ago, and it still scares me when I read it!!!
No one should tell you that you can't die. Of course you could, or you could die from one of the problems associated with morbid obesity, or you could get hit by a bus.(sorry for being blunt)
Your family problably has some legitimite concerns for you, and If the surgery before didn't quite work, they may be thinking that the same thing could happen again. I can only tell you that from my point of view, having this surgery saved my life. I lost not only my excess weight and improved my blood sugar, blood pressure, ect...But most important, I became a real person, and honest to goodness functioning member of this society! I no longer dread going out of the house, I can play with my boys, I am the mother and wife that I never thought that I could be.
Having said that, I still struggle daily with my food demons, I don't know what happend with your previous surgery, but I can tell you that if you have a food addiction, NOW is the time to deal with it, before your surgery. That was my mistake, one that I didn't realize I had made until I was one year post op. Then the weight loss slows down, and you have to really star****ching what you are putting in your mouth. I hope that I have helped you somewhat, and If I have just made you more concerned, I am so sorry, In my defense, it is early and I am doing my bills!(uggh!!!)
Good Luck,
Cathy Martin
Cathy, I AM the mother of two little boys and I really DO want to be the person I know I can be. I can't tell you how much your words were EXACTALLY what I needed to start my day off with. Boy! You're good Girl! HA-HA! I do want to do this for me, and my BIGEST reason is so I can just stop existing and start living again. I want to be here for my boys and myself. I want to PLAY again. I want to roll in the floor and laugh and tickle and just be fun. My five year old asked me if I could be a "playful" parent and it broke my heart because I want to be. Loosing this weight through a second surgery on some level does not matter anymore.......because it is me who will be found. Again, Cathy..........thank you SO much. You just don't know. To hear someone who actually understand is golden
No need to thank me, I know how you are feeling. My oldest is 5 as well, and my second is right behind them at age 4! I don't really know where I would be if I hadn't had my surgery. I never took them out, I just didn't have the energy. I think that so far my biggest regret in life has been all that I missed doing with them before my surgery. We just stayed in the house all day long, becuase I just couldn't bear to go out, I think alot of it had to do with my depression over my weight as well.
There aren't alot of regular posters here who are as far out from surgery as me. The reason that I am around is for two very important reasons...
I need the support, I don't know what I would do without this wonderful group of people here, that know just what I am going through..
When I had my surgery, I was at such a desperate point, that I never really researched it like I should have..Ins approval was actually not a problem, it was quite easy. I was lucky enough not to have any complications, but what if I had? I feel that the most important thing that you or anyone can do is to educate yourself about this surgery. Complications can happen, and you need to prepare yourself mentally for them. Chances are, you will be just fine, but knowledge is power.
Take care, and I would love to chat anytime how neat is it that we are both the mothers of 2 boys? We are having a lunch get together on 4/30 and you must know that you are more than welcome to come. Both pre and post ops come, sometimes alot and sometimes a little...
Cathy
Muan, 
Yes, the memorial page can wipe you out. It did me, and I think that's a good thing because death is a real possibility and we should definitely be aware. I knew that more people lived than died, though.
I decided a few things:
1. I was committed to living well, therefore I did my research (reading many times till my eyes watered and burned) and chose a doctor whom I considered to be THE best, judging by his mortality and complication stats.
2. My surgeon was very skilled and was committed to bringing me out of surgery alive and well. He didn't need to lower his stats by being careless with me.
3. And this is the big one. God was in charge of my destiny, He loves me and I trust Him. He did not have to wait until I got into an operating room and kill me. If it was my time to go He could take me while I was just sitting in my bedroom. He's God.
I went ahead with the surgery and I have not regretted it at all. I wish I had not waited so long. I have had no complications, not one. Just think I could still be sitting here, still waffling and steady getting sicker and fatter, instead of living and anticipating my new life and body to come.
No one can tell you whether to have surgery or not. No one should presuade you one way or the other. This is a Big Girl/Big Boy kind of decision. You, and you alone will have to make that decision. I believe that ultimately we all make the decision that is right for us.
For me the solution became quite simple. I weighed 509 lbs. the doctor said I would live no longer than another 4 years. Personally, I thought more like 1. So that 4 years didn't scare me, it gave me more time than I thought I had, time to take some action. I really didn't have too much to lose by having wls. Nothing but weight. (no pun intended) I was low bottom and I knew it. Only you can decide where you are.
Joyce 
Yes, the memorial page can wipe you out. It did me, and I think that's a good thing because death is a real possibility and we should definitely be aware. I knew that more people lived than died, though.
I decided a few things:
1. I was committed to living well, therefore I did my research (reading many times till my eyes watered and burned) and chose a doctor whom I considered to be THE best, judging by his mortality and complication stats.
2. My surgeon was very skilled and was committed to bringing me out of surgery alive and well. He didn't need to lower his stats by being careless with me.
3. And this is the big one. God was in charge of my destiny, He loves me and I trust Him. He did not have to wait until I got into an operating room and kill me. If it was my time to go He could take me while I was just sitting in my bedroom. He's God.
I went ahead with the surgery and I have not regretted it at all. I wish I had not waited so long. I have had no complications, not one. Just think I could still be sitting here, still waffling and steady getting sicker and fatter, instead of living and anticipating my new life and body to come.
No one can tell you whether to have surgery or not. No one should presuade you one way or the other. This is a Big Girl/Big Boy kind of decision. You, and you alone will have to make that decision. I believe that ultimately we all make the decision that is right for us.
For me the solution became quite simple. I weighed 509 lbs. the doctor said I would live no longer than another 4 years. Personally, I thought more like 1. So that 4 years didn't scare me, it gave me more time than I thought I had, time to take some action. I really didn't have too much to lose by having wls. Nothing but weight. (no pun intended) I was low bottom and I knew it. Only you can decide where you are.
Joyce Most Active
Recent Topics
