Oh Gosh I'm scared

I've had a lot on my plate from the get-go with this surgery. It has allowed me to gain my life to a healthier life than I ever had before, but as I come into my 2 year anniversary I have run into some people that i know are much further out than I am - but have started to re-gain the weight back. I am a gym-a-holic but it's admittedly because this is honestly my biggest fear. I DO NOT (I repeat - DO NOT) want to gain the weight back but I fine my self able to eat a bit more now than I hae been even at 18 months out. It is no where near the portions I was able to eat before surgery, but I still find myself able to eat. I am in the gym an abnormal amount of time (national average says you should work ot 30 min a day) I'm in the gym on any given night from an hour - MINIMUM - ti 4 hours. I think I"ve turned my obsession that I had before with eating to exercising. And it's all in fear of getting out of shape again. Please someone tell me I am NOT alone in this. I seriously have worried myself sick over this. Much Dee Dee

Heya Dee Dee.... I dunno sweetie... I think it's all in how you look at it... you know, attitude is everything I mean, we all work, and go home, and do the laundry and dishes and all the other myriad of things that must be done... and we all need to have another avenue to enjoy things that make us happy, i.e. hobbies and sports and entertainment etc... You have chosen the fitness center.... There are about a bazillion things you could have chosen as an outlet that are not good... but you have chosen a very healthy lifestyle and your hobby is exercise! ... along with the social part of going to a gym... I dunno sweetie... I think it's all in how you look at it... you know, attitude is everything I just joined the Y ... and have just started exercising again since .... sheesh... forever it seems. I can see how you can get hooked on it... it's been a long time since I have felt that good! .... good grief, I even jogged on the treadmill! .... we're talking about 12 years since this body jogged eh.... My killer is the evening eating... always has been, and I still have that monkey on my back even with the surgery... I guess the surgeon forgot to work on my head like I asked him too... I feel like if I could control that urge to eat 3 times from 6pm - 10pm, I would really be able to lose more weight... and I am also able to eat "too much" now... so I am also worrying about gaining my weight back... hasn't happened yet, but I am sure nervous about it... I'll trade ya.... I'll make you feel good about being a gymaholic, and you help me stop eating such large amounts and eating all the time at night

Thank you Marc, I realize that what I'm doing is MUCH healthier than before - and after exercising as much as I do I've diciplined myself to refrain from eating all day every day. I do not typically eat after I get to the gym...my nighttime meal is my protein drink. I know I can proudly say my resting heart rate is 48 and that I can run cardio exercises for an hour straight and not feel so completely drained afterwards. (yes - I can teach 3 hour long classes back-to-back and still be able to walk upright....NEVER would I have been able to do that pre-op!) I just have to keep my eyes focused on what I've worked for and not let the bad habits overwhelm my life. I know I'm getting older and the rest of my diet for the rest of my life is going to be an uphill battle....I just have to make sure that I'm willing to fight the battle. Sometimes just putting the words out there helps me to keep focused!!! Thank you for the words of encouragement!! Dee Dee

It is definitely a struggle, and the fact that you are scared says more than your realize about your chances for continued success. I've been taking steps of late to work towards going back in the right direction, and I am shaking my booty again, and actually for the first time on a very regular basis. I've started Curves, I know it's not the full fledged gym routine that you have going on, but considering I had NOT been doing ANYTHING it is a DEFINITE step in the right direction. AND I find myself not being almost angry about having to go... i still HATE HATE HATE to exercise, but I'm doing it....(I always joke that the hardest part of my workout is the drive to the gym!LOL!) Hang in there Dee Dee....keep that healthy fear that you have and keep moving forward. I wish my new addiction were working out instead of late night munchies or buying clothes when I really don't have the money. If you are REALLY concerned that you are exercising to a point of "illness"...do you have a counselor or therapist that you can talk to ?? I love you and I don't mean to gloss over your desire to work out...I understand the fear of going in the wrong direction....

I know I've been a gym rat from the get-go and that is a great thing, however my family and "other" friends (who have not had the surgery) think I exercise to the point of insanity. I *ENJOY* working out. The way I feel afterwards is such a ru****'s hard to explain. I KNOW I have addictive tendencies.....I come from a long line of that - but I also know most of the time no one's holding a gun to my head forcing me to be there - I AM there of my own choosing. I can take a night off if I need to. I just really don't want to have come as far as I have and in a few years be fat again. (had to put that really bluntly!) I have learned more about eating more nutritionally sound.....but when I'm on the go I still have the habits of grabbing a bag of chips and a coke.....(My down fall). I don't think my exercising is to the point of obsession....I do leave when I have something family related or have other "things" I want to do.....(like I went to the ren fest this past weekend so I only took one class on Sat instead of my normal 2.) so I don't think it's an "illness" - at least not yet I just don't want this to not work for me......and I want others to knw it's seriously a TOOL......and ONLY a tool - it DOES NOT fix your head!!! There is a HUGE difference at your "year surgiversary" than at the 2 year mark..... Thanks for letting me vent..... Love ya too girlie!!! Dee Dee

Dee Dee: Thanks for sharing your feelings on something that is very real to all of us. Though we sometimes dont talk about it. It is a huge fear for me. I unlike you have not become a fitness nut. I keep thinking soon I will exercise, but I have had some hip and back problems that keep me from it. Well at least in my mind anyway. I wish I had your abnormal gym gene and could force myself to do it. I know as time goes by, I will be able to eat more and more too. And with no exercise in place, I am sure I can only gain. Since I have problems with gyms, like I hate them, I dont know what I am doing, I feel intimidated by the machines, I have considered taking line dancing lessons or something that would keep me moving but be more fun. I think you are perfectly normal in your fears Dee Dee. As for the abnormal amount of time in the gym. I wasnt sure what constitutes an exercise addiction, so I googled it and found this link aribella.com/exerciseobsession.htm (of course you need to put http:// in front of it). Apparently there are people out there who are addicted to exercise, that will never happen to me. Hang in there and be proud of your successes. And please keep talking to us about it! Hugs, Kelly S

Thank you for the link Kelly, apparently I'm not addicted YET but could be if I keep obsesing over wether or not I've eaten more than whay I will allow of my 1200 calories a day. (I allow that much mostly because I burn anywhere from 500 - 900 at night at the gym.) Going to a gym is not for everyone. I certainly do understand that. I honestly feel that if I went to another gym the feelings might not be the same because I'm actually "drawn" into my gym because of the owners being who they are. (They have a weekly show on public TV that I would watch and I just think they're good people and actually KNOW their members by name - well....as many as they can and THAT made me WANT to be in the gym.) It's made such a huge impact on me that I want to be there - that in turn developed into the "need" to exercise. I know it's a daily battle...that I'm determined to win. I just don't want to become a "statistic" that doesn't make it work for them. Thank you for the words of encouragement. Sometimes we need to keep it as real as we can to not disillusion some of the "new" post - ops that the struglle will suddenly end...it doesn't. I love you guys!!!! I knew you'd understand! Dee Dee

Dee Dee, I am only 9 weeks out...but I do cardio 7 days a week. I too don't want to change one obession for another.....and I am afraid I am doing that. Every time, I think i want to graze...I go do something physical....BUT i guess it could be more destructive... But I do wish you the best of luck..... See you on the happy and healthy side, Lea Lewis

well - you're very early into the honeymoon period and take FULL advantage now of learning the right things to eat along with the right portions. I think it's FANTASTIC that you're exercising - but remember you will also need to do some weight training - even just a small amount. (there's my #1 addiction....LOVE to do weights!!!) but I feel ya - when I'm really stressed at work I've been known to lock myself in the bathroom and do push ups till I couldn't stand it any more (Yeah - I'm a freak!) Keep up your good work!!! It's a WONDERFUL jouney!!!!

Dee Dee, I have been doing sculpting on Sundays with 3 lb weights....along with my cardio. One of my bestfriends...use to be a physical weight trainer and works out tremendously....and I am going to get her to take me one day and show me what equipment i need to work out to help me tone my arms and inner thighs...I want to do all i can with out any plastic surgery..... I will star****er aerobics with weights soon...well in my back yard. as soon as it warms up...it seems it is easy for me to do that then actual aerobics with the weights..I have to be careful I have full fusion on my ankle (7 surgeries in the last 5 years) and because I have club feet my hips and back is out of wack....so I have to actually watch everything I do....THAT IS WHY I AM LOVING THIS SURGERY.....my back feels awesome and so does my foot....and I am actually moving and groving.... my husband and i have went out the last 5 weekends and we danced almost all night...we haven't did that since before we got married. I haven't known you long....but i think you look beautiful and have done an awesome job. If it was easy for us to lose weight and keep it off, we wouldn't have had the surgery. So I honestly believe we will have to work at it the rest of our lives. See you on the happy and healthy side, Lea