am i a hypocrite?

Ok guys, I'm almost reluctant to post this but I really need your help...a very good friend of mine who I also dated a few years ago is driving down to Orlando to hang out for the weekend. I know that he still likes me and I have made it clear to him that we are just friends but I never told him the reason....I don't find myself physically attracted to him anymore because he is overweight....and I feel horrible for even saying it but it's the truth and it's not something I can hide. Of course I would never tell him that that is the reason and I feel like a bad person just for thinking that way. I know I have no right to judge him like that but I just don't feel an attraction anymore, does this make me a bad person???

Marta, I guess I am the only talking to you today. LOL Ok, Let's see. I do not believe you are a bad person. Think, were you attracted to him before, or was it that you just thought he was the best you could do at that time? I have to admit I have had some relationships for that reason. I do not know if you can really say you are judging him for his weight if you were not emontional tied to him in the first place. In other words if it was just *** back then you really were never attracted to him and were just friends in the first place. The problem is to not hurt him by making him think it is all because of his weight. He needs to understand you are friends and only friends. Friends that do not have *** together. Maybe I am the bad person as I can understand where you are coming from. Saddly I have been on both sides of the fence. I was a size 10 for two years and dated tons of guys, none over weight. I still perfer a tall buff guy to a couch potatoe. Sorry Guys! Not sure any of this helps, But I wish you good luck, gail

It's ok if you are the only talking to me today sweetie I love hearing from you!!! I posted on the main board too and have actually gotten some pretty good advice too, thank you for understanding what i'm dealing with here, I just hope we have a great weekend!

You'll be ok. Good Luck. Here's a Fairy wish for luck. gail

No, I don't think you are being a hypocrite, you are just being honest. I am sure that I am not as physically attractive to my wife at 300 pounds as I was at 225. The reality is that it is hard to be attracted in a physical way to someone who is morbidly obese, that doesn't diminish their value as a human being, but it DOES diminish their value as a sexual partner. That might offend some people, but as someone who is morbidly obese himself, I would be doing a disservice to myself if I said it didn't matter.

girl.. NO.. your feeling is perfectly normal.. hay dont feel bad.. im not attarated to light skin men...soo... no you are not a bad person.. its just feelings and you are aloud to have them!!

Hey Girlie! Congrats on the bikini and your newly-found sense of feeling like a hottie. Well, I see you have had lots of responses to your post on both boards. I agree with everyone else. Everyone is attracted to different types of people and if you just arent physically attracted to your friend then you are human. Obviously you care for him as a friend or you wouldnt even be concerned about how you are feeling or afraid of hurting his feelings. I, on the other hand, like tall, stocky, beefy, burly, fluffy (call it what you like) men. My last bf was a former NFL linebacker and he was close to 350 pounds. So if your friend falls into my preference, give him my number...hehehehe Take care, Amy P.S. You have interest in drivning together to Jax to their gathering in July?