Please talk to me...

THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH !! You all made this day a little easier. You know guys I really thank you for all the encouraging words. I am so glad I have you all here. I was looking at my kids last night and I am leaving to go 600 miles to have surgery. I have the times where I think the "what if's". I think we all do but it is good to know I have a support group. Thank you EVERYONE!!! Robin ~

Robin, You will full of emotions. Which I might add is normal. The closer I had gotten the more of a Roller Coaster I was on. I cried, smile,cried and then finally I was at peace with it. I knew in my heart I was ready at whatever cost. I even wrote letters to my family in case of my death and gave it to my best friend to hold. She said "I will see you soon and when I do the letters will be given beck to you". Well I got them back and needless to say they were shredded. I have NO REGRETS about the surgery. WIll do it again in a heart beat. This surgery will save my life. The life that Obesity has robbed me of for years. I know that a lot of people will say you will be fine as I am sure you will be. But only you can come to terms with this. Best of luck.

Robin: If you weren't nervous, I'd suggest visiting the psychologist again. You're undertaking what amounts to a whole new life. Recognize that your concerns are valid and your apprehension is entirely sensible, and stay focused on your goal. Spend your time making a list of what you need to attend to before surgery (shopping lists, things to take to the hospital, who's going to water your plants, etc), then spend some time taking a personal inventory and focusing just on yourself. You're undertaking a fantastic adventure. You've already shown yourself that you have the strength to do this. Just hang on and stay focused. I had my surgery on 05/07/04. I checked in on Friday morning, had surgery on Friday afternoon, spent two days in ICU (the heparin I was given caused my blood pressure to spike sometimes), then spent three days in a regular room. By Wednesday I was SO ready to go home! The actual mechanics of the procedure were pretty uneventful. Having a six incision caused a fair amount of discomfort when I was required to sit up in bed or get out of bed, but it was more discomfort than pain. I had pain meds at my disposal and wasn't shy about using them, ever. Aside from that, there were only minor things that were troubling: No one told me that, post-op, my intestines would be in such a state of upheaval. I was told to expect a little gas, but what I experienced was gas and a fairly significant amount of intestinal pressure. It wasn't painful, but i sure was uncomfortable especially while I was laying in a hospital bed with no one to answer my questions, it was a concern. Also, I was thirsty just about all the time. From the first time I was aware of being awake in ICU until the minute I checked out five days later, I was chomping on ice chips 24 hours a day. If you're thirsty, ask for ice. The ICU nursing staff where I had my surgery went way out of their way to make sure I was comfortable and had everything I needed or wanted, and that included someone to hold my hand when I was scared or confused. Don't be afraid to ask for help, even if you don't know what it is you need. Once I got home and I was able to feel comfortable and secure in my own surroundings, things improved DRAMATICALLY. I was walking around the house all the time, walking around the neighborhood a few times a day, and after three days, started going to the gym (walking slowly on the treadmill only). I got tired easily for the first three weeks and would take one or two naps during the afternoon. After being home for two weeks, my partner and I drove to New Jersey (we live in St Pete) for a little vacation with my family. I was still sleepy, but had absolutely no problems whatsoever. I'm still finding my way regarding foods I can tolerate, I've learned real fast when to stop eating, and I'm getting pretty good at listening to my body. My biggest challenge at the moment is getting head-hunger and physical hunger in synch. I still think I could go to the Pizza Hut Lunch Buffet and clean them out, but the reality is that I'm rarely hungry, and when I do eat, it has to be something high-protein that's actually good for me, and not just something to stuff in my mouth. It's a challenge, but I'm getting there. As of this morning, 38 days post-op, I've lost 52 pounds. I dropped 37 pounds in the first two weeks, then lost practically nothing while we were on vacation, and since returning, the loss has been pretty steady. Sorry if I've been rambling, but I wasn't able to find any nuts and bolts information before my surgery, and that kind of insight would have really been helpful to me. I need to feel that I'm well-prepared when I go into a new situation, and pre-op, I wasn't as informed as I should have been. Let me know if you need any additional info, or if there's anything I can do to help. In the meantime, take a deep breath, look at your face in the mirror, and just wink at yourself. You're about to pull off a miracle.... Tom

PS: If you want to have a conversation on-line, my AOL Instant Messenger name is T2FLA. Don't be shy... T