I need Answers Please!!!!

Hi All, It's that time again. Yes, for me to vent. My support systems are in order, my weight is pulling off fast, but fast in who's eyes? Not mine that is for sure. Oh you look so good, to who? Not me. I know you feel good, No not really. Sure I can eat just about anything and not get sick, at least for now. Be thankful they say, oh but I am thankful. So what are you trying to say they ask? I am doing this thing because I have no choice at his point I say. But in the meantime can anybody tell me when does it get better. I have talked with my therapist, I have talked with my Lisa C. I have talked with Lisa D. I have talked with Wendy, I have talked with Debbie and tons of others. But when do I feel better I ask. Now what I need to know is the real deal. I need to talk to someone who is having the emotional difficulties that I am having. I am not sure what is wrong, is it just me, am I the only one that feels this way. I mean I read post after post after post and I hear all the glitz and glamour, but I have yet to come across anyone that has really displayed any real emotional trauma. If you are out there please respond because I need to talk. If you do not wanna tell your story on air please email me privately. I just need to know am I the only person that feels this way. I can give very good advice, and I can give lots of support and say encouraging things and mean them from the bottom of my heart, but I can not take my own advice, I am terrible at being my own support person. I am not trying to scare and new post ops or pre ops, this does not affect everybody the same, but for me it is beyond anything I could have evr conceived mentally and before I loose my mind I just need to know is it me? Am I the only person that feels this way? Adrienne

I didn't go through the same level of trauma you are describing but I can really sense your frustration level is running very high... Keep in mind that not only are you dealing with the enormous level of stress due to physical trauma (your body doesn't distinguish an operation from a street fight wound), rapid change physically, maybe emotional trauma from the drastic change in diet as well as from the rapid changes and other stressors, constantly having to keep a happy face when others ask how you're doing.. etc. etc. etc. but you go through a few months of massive hormonal surges. I don't know your age or anything.. but I am only 31 and the hormones were awful. Estrogen is stored in your fat cells and as they shrink huge amounts of estrogen are released into your bloodstream. This causes whacked out periods and insane mood swings. It took me almost this full past three months just to get on an even keel - I would rage over nothing, bite people's heads off, cry for stupid reasons, feel nauseated, etc. This process is different for everyone.. I hope you get some contact from someone else going through something similar - I know you aren't alone in this - I hear of people at the support group meetings I used to attend that go through similar experiences. Hang in there - it will get better, but some of that is a choice you have to make as well.

Hey Adrienne.... I can relate to how u feel. I had a very difficult time the first 3 months after my surgery. Besides feeling physically sick ALL the time, I felt emotionally spent. Tho I feel better everyday, I have to remind myself that only my body was altered, not my thinking process. I guess my emotional trama is the emotion of failure and fear......intence to say the least. Your first paragraph reminds me of myself. No matter how well I have done so far, I question that success, or look beyond it. I have no advice to give, no oppinions, no remedies. BUT I do thank you for posting your frustrations , although I'm sorry to hear you are going thru difficulties, I now see I am not alone with my own. Keep venting!! -Becca