I GOT A DATE!!!

WELL I FINALLY GOT A DATE, OCTOBER 29, 2003 I WILL BE CHANGING MY LIFE FOREVER. I AM SO HAPPY YET SO ANXIOUS. I KNOW I HAVE MADE THE RIGHT DECISION AND I PRAY I CAN BE PATIENT ENOUGH TILL THE DATE GETS HERE(GIVES ME TIME TO PREPARE LOL) BUT MY FAMILY STILL DOESNT SEEM TO BE THERE WITH ME. NO ONE SEEMS AS HAPPY AS I AM. I WONDER IF THEY KNOW THAT THIS IS GOING TO SAVE MY LIFE? I DONT KNOW HAS ANYONE ELSE DELT WITH THIS FEELING? I REALLY COULD USE SOME HELP WITH THE EMOTIONS I AM HAVING NOW. MELODY

I really think that you should sit down with your family members and let them know how badly you need their support. I can't imagine not having the support and understanding of my near and dear. With our families, I think that sometimes the Devil they know is better than the Devil they don't. They may be very afraid that you will change in other ways, too. They may be right, because when we feel better, we seem to expect better from ourselves and the old inter-personal dynamics don't always work. Attending support group meetings with your family might be a good idea if you can get them to go..or even letting them read on these boards. Just a suggestion, Hon. And big congratulations on getting a date.

Melody, Congratulations on your date! Regarding your lack of support-what is important is that YOU believe you have made the right decision. Does your doc have a counselor who is familar with the surgery? Maybe it would be helpful to speak with a professional to help with the emotions. One of the reasons why I chose not to tell anyone except my immediate family is that obesity is difficult to understand, even for those of us dealing with it. Good luck with the journey! Lynda

Melody, my husband and close friends were there for me since the beginning of my journey, but my mother had a difficult time. I think she was concentrating on the seriousness of the operation and the possible complications. She attended some info meetings and also a support group meeting and that seemed to calm her down a bit. She finally accepted my choice and started coming along on some of my MANY doctors' appointments. After my surgery, my mom was there night and day for me. My husband had to get back to work, so Mom filled right in with whatever I needed. She is truly my angel!

Dear Melody, congradulations on getting your date. If this feels right to you, then you are doing the right thing for you. There comes a time in our lives that as MO people that we must do what we can to take charge in our own battle of the bulge. Iweighed 363# for several years. I dieted, starved, walked and everthing else I could do to get off the weight. For the las 5 years I have been trying that same stratagy, but I could not lose any more weight. I have been at or around 270-278 for all this time. I prayed about having this surgery and then I approachd my family. My husband, children, brother, and sister agreed that this was a good option for me, so I began to research my options. When I told my parents, I hit a major road block. I even took my folks to th einitial appointment with the surgeon. My Dad was won over but not my Mom. She did not like the complications, nor the fact that I would have a G-tube for 4-5 weeks. I triedd to talk to her about all of this on a one to one basis and she refused. All this happened last November. I kept talking to here about it and gave her more literature than she knew what to do with, about the benefits of the surgery. I'm not going to say she was thrilled with my chose to have the WLS, but she did understand a little more. I had the surgery July 9th at Ocala Reginal Medical Center in Ocala, FL. I used Dr.M. Juwad. I'm very glad that I did have the surgery, and I had it for myself, which in the long run will help my family. If you need to talk some more about this, just remember, I am an e-mail away. The time will go by quicker than you think, just keep busy. I will put you in my prayers, I really do believe in the power of prayer....Brenda in Apopka, FL