I can't make this stuff up!

A few of you guys know that I got in a bike wreck this weekend.   What those few people don't know is the situation that led up to the crash.   Quite simply... I was attacked by birds.   Sandpiper to be exact of the type Catoptrophorus semipalmatus.   I still don't know what caused them to attack me but I would assume it was something to do with them thinking I was invading their nests and trying to mess with their eggs.   My moments of zen, riding just after sunrise on the beach were suddenly interuppted.  The few short moments of the birds divebombing me were enough for me to take my eyes off the road and drift only a short 6" to the sand on the side of the road that was all sand of the beaches between Pensacola and Navarre Beach.   I must say it was a spectacular crash.  I was going around 22mph.  My front wheel hit the sand and stopped.   The bike, with me clipped in rotated the full 180 degrees around the front wheel, slamming me into the sand, with my left side impacting a driftwood log that seemed to be strategically placed in the sand bank.   Keys, money, tire tools, id, credit cards, tire tubes and anything else that wasn't screwed to the bike flew in all directions in a 20 foot area around the crash.  My face, along with the rest of my body went into the sand.  It's 5 days later and I'm still spitting out sand granules and picking sand out of my nose and ear.    Moments after the cra****hought the driftwood had impaled me.   I was struggling to catch my breath, any breath as the pain on my left side was so intense I wanted to cry.  I looked down and saw there was no impalement but I knew I was hurt.   I've never broken anything but my collarbone and that was in kindergarten so I don't really remember the feeling.   This numb, intense pain in my ribcage was growing progressively worse as I attempted to stand.   Now get this...  The little ******* birds had done their deed.  They crashed me.   But do you think they let up?  Noooooooo!   They continued to screw with me, divebombing within inches of my face causing me to flinch and cringe which in turn sent intense sharp pains to my ribs.   I finally got some assistance from a few local cyclists who stopped after seeing my garage sale of gear scattered about.  They called for assistance and got me back to the condo.  The rest of the weekend involved sitting on a couch with ice. 

The pain hadn't gone down so I went to the doctor on Monday.  She, or rather the x-rays confirmed that I had a major contusion over a bunch of the ribs and a hairline fracture on one of the ribs.    Nothing TOO serious but she said it would take awhile to heal.   She released me to do whatever I felt up to doing because no amount of swimming, biking or running would hinder the healing process, however it would probably be unformfortable.   Well...  the biking and running weren't so bad.   I wrapped up with gauze to hold everything real tight and while it was unformfortable, I could tolerate it.  Swimming on the other hand... WTF???!!!!   When I breathed on either side I could feel the bones 'popping' and moving around.  It was seriously messed up.    I was reduced to breaststroke and it looks like that's what I'll be using during the swim at the Heatwave tri this weekend.  That is unless Mr. Miyagi shows up and does the clapping hands thing on my side for me.    No way I'm not racing and I'll be doing it with a broken rib.  How awesome (or friggin' stupid) is that?  Heh.

My coaches suggestion?   Rub some dirt on it and get your ass back in the pool, back on the bike and back on the road! :)

I surely hope you guys are having a better week.

Yes, that's friggin' awesome and stupid.

I was reading a thread on another site about how the Ironman organization is being sued for a death during an Ironman and people were saying "I know this is dangerous and I think every time I start a race that I might die during it."

I have to say, I never think that, but I have several times thought "if my tire goes flat right now, I'm dead" while out biking. I also have a phobia about birds attacking me.

So thanks for feeding into both my fears at once. ;-)

Wow, that is one bad crash!  Did you hurt any of the birds?  Hope you heal quickly, because pain can really get in the way of the training schedule.  Good luck and don't push too hard.
Rob

Note to self: avoid catoptrophorus semipalmatus at all cost.

Chad you are going to have one hell of an autobiography to write one of these days!

wow, what a story.  rub some dirt in it was my dad's mantra pretty much every time i got hurt as a kid, including 2 lacerations that needed a bunch of stiches and two broken bones....

Suck it up!!!

Damn Chad, what a messed up day.  Sorry you were attacked.  But the important question.....
Is the bike O.K.?

I hope you make it through the tri without too much pain.
Best wishes and good luck

Scott

It's too bad there isn't video of this.
That would be an Americas funniest home video for sure.
At least you could have won some money for it.

Scott

It sucks he got hurt but if it was as funny as it was in my head, it would have won for sure!

Payback's

Sorry for your pain, but thanks for the laugh.  I had tears streaming down my face with each wince and giggle as I ready your story.  Heal well.