I am 36 years old.  I had RNY on 6/23/03.  I went from 312 pounds to 170 in the first year.  I was able to maintain my weight for about 5 years.  Within the last 2 years I have gained 45 pounds.  I know it's my own fault, for going back to my old ways.  I am so disappointed and disguested with myself.  I have tried numerous times to get back on track but I always seem to go back to my bad habits.  My insurance did not pay for my WLS.  I paid cash for it.  I am so upset with myself for spending $20,000 and then gaining so much weight back.  I could blame it on my divorce, medical problems and depression but the truth is, I know it's because I got lazy and stopped following the rules.  At this point I wonder if I will ever be able to get back to where I want to be.  I have read about some people having a revision.  I wonder if that is an option.  I really need some support and friendship from people who understand what I am going through,  I feel like a complete failure.