Christian Chick on WLS Journey

Hello! My name is Darcy and I am a 26 year old wife and mother. I have been married to the LOVE OF MY LIFE, Daniel, for what will be 6 years in August. We have two beautiful Heaven Sent little boys, Eli (he'll be 3 in May) and Brody who is 6 months old. We live in Yakima, but towards the end of May, we will be residing in Moxee where we are having our first home built. I can't wait to move into our home. In August of 1999 Daniel and I got married here in Yakima...3 short days after our wedding, we (I) moved cross-country to Hinesville, Georgia (Ft. Stewart, Ga.). I was now an Army wife. Time flew by fast! In Sept. of 2003 my husband got honorably discharged and is now a Graphic Designer working in Kennewick...1hr and 15 minutes from here...We decided to make our home in Yakima because ALL our family lives here. To make a LONG story short...I am continuing my WLS journey, and I NEED your help...PLEASE! We have NO insurance, so I am going to have to pay for my WLS outta our pocket...It's going to take a while to save up since we make enough to scrape by, are buying a new home and have 2 babies...But, THROUGH CHRIST, ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE! I love to have fun! I am a good person with good morals. I see everyone as equals. God is NUMBER ONE in my life. Without Him, I would be and have nothing. I have a good personality and sense of humor...I LOVE spending time with my family, shopping, doing arts & crafts, going to the ocean, shopping, drawing, painting, cooking, and did I mention shopping ? I LOVE life...I guess that that is one of the main reasons for wanting to have WLS...I WANT to LIVE my life for as LONG as I can in a healthy manner. I wanna see my boys 1st day or kindergarden, go to their school holiday concerts and be able to fit into the chairs, see them graduate, see them fall in love, TRUE love (like their Dad and I share), and get married, hold my first....and last grandchildren, and even see my great grandchildren. I want to see what life is like as a weight loss LOOSER, not one that society has made out to be a looser just because I'm "fluffy." People are too quick to judge and that's not right...but, that's how it is. We ALL bleed red. Well, enough about me...Time to hear from you! Thanks for your time! God Bless, ~Darcy

Hi Darcy, I'm a Christian to and I have a few Q for you. I was wondering if God would be okay if I would have the surgery, What's your thought on that? And this is a hard Q to ask. Being your a bigger person is your husband bothered by the extra weight? Does it bother your Sex life? I'm asking because my husband is bothered so much that he never hugs me anymore or sex is never in the picture. And because of this I feel so bad about myself almost all of the time that I even eat more because I feel so unloved by him. Do you think it is not my weight that is causing him to not desire me anymore? We've been married going on 27 years. This is so personal that I don't know who to talk to about this. I want to be loved and I feel so rejected. He did say for a long time it was because of my weight, but I think it could be him going through his mid-life stuff. He is not following God anymore either and ever since then our relationship has been really distant. So do you have any suggestions for this burdened soul? Thanks, Bonnie :~)

Hi Bonnie, Wow, those are some tough questions and I'm not sure that I have all the answers you are looking for...But, I will do MY BEST to answer them in my own opinion. I'm not sure HOW God feels about us having this surgery. I know that He is the creator of us...However...None of us are perfect. Here are some things to ponder: WHAT DOES GOD'S WORD SAY ABOUT....DIET? God gave us His laws so that we would know how to eat wisely. Keeping these laws will not produce holiness, nor gain us entry into heaven. However, we can benefit from them and be able to serve the Lord better if our physical bodies are in good shape. We must trust the creator to know what is best for us to eat, instead of eating according to our traditions. He not only made our bodies, but all the animals as well and He certainly would not have made the distinction between "clean and unclean" in Leviticus 11 if it makes no difference what we eat. 1 Corinthians 10:31 sums it up beautifully, "Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God." So, in all our partaking of food or drink we must ask ourselves, "Is what I am doing pleasing to God? Will my diet nourish my body so that it will be efficient in His service? Will it make my mind keener, my muscles stronger, my judgement more sound, my influence for the Lord more potent?" Some things that we drink are just as bad for our bodies as the food we eat. We must ask God to deliver us from every desire to eat or drink anything that would defile our temples. Not only should our spiritual temples be cleansed but our physical ones as well, so that we might serve the Lord without any hindrances. If we really desire to become an overcomer, we will bring our bodies into subjection to the Holy Spirit as Paul did in 1 Corin. 9:24-27; "Know ye not that they which run in a race run all, but one receiveth the prize? So run, that ye may obtain. And every man that striveth for the mastery is temperate in all things. Now they do it to obtain a corruptible crown; but we an incorruptible. I therefore so run, not as uncertainly; so fight I, not as one that beateth the air: But I keep under my body, and bring it into subjection: lest that by any means, when I have preached to others, I myself should be a castaway." I'm looking at this WLS as a way to "WIN THE RACE" and take back complete control of my life. I have prayed about this surgery many, many times...I am seeking GOD'S WILL...Not my own. I beleive that He will let me know what is best for my family and me. I've always been an "overly fluffy" person since I can remember. It was worst in school as kids made fun of me...Looking back at pictres of me when I was a child, I wasn't really even that big or chubby...Then there was my dad who always made fun of me...I'm still trying to figure out what he was trying to accomplish by doing that...He's just a jerk, so, whatever. As far as your husband goes...I don't know what to tell you there...I have a really good husband who loves me for me. He is very supportive of me wether I have the surgery or decide not to. He loves me for me. He's even said before that he married me for me not for the way I look, etc...But to answer your question, No, my being overweight doesn't bother him at all. He was 174 and 6 feet tell when we were married (too skinny) and he still married me. My being fulffy hasn't affected our sex life either...That area is pretty healthy...*blushing* Maybe you could sit down with your husband and talk to him about the things that are bothering you and let him know how you are feeling. You are going to have to be real open and honest with him...and, ask him to do the same. I beleive that EVERYONE deserves happiness and that no one should live in an unhappy situation. Of course, that's just my opinion. I've only been married for 5 1/2 years...You have a lot more experience than I do in knowing the whole situation and how you're feeling...I can tell you that I will keep you in my prayers and I'll pray that God sees you through this situation and gives you the answers you need...No matter what they are. I've gotta get going. Please e-mail me again when you get a chance. Talk to you later. ~Darcy