Scared, need someone to talk to

I have been waiting to get a date and now that I have one I am scared to death. I have never had surgery before and now my family seems to be against it. I am severely obese and need the extra help from the surgery. Anyone have any words of wisdom?

 Hi, 
I can relate almost 100%! I am waiting still to get my surgery date. I have never had surgery before and am very freaked out! My family encouraged me to get the surgery and now seem to be very hot and cold about it. I feel like my support system isn't as stable as I'd like. I currently weigh 333 lbs (super morbidly obese). I wish I had some wisdom for you. But I can say you are absolutely NOT alone in this journey. There are so many people in the WLS community who are so supportive and are willing to be your strength when you can't seem to find your own. If you need someone to talk to who can lend an empathetic ear I'd love to help! 

I do know how you feel 3months out.I had nothing but faith,and all the knowledge I picked up from reading.the board.There will always be a first time that life changing.I strongly believe if you thing positive then you get positive results.There will always be the what if.... I have a very close friend who always spoke negative while I was preparing for my surgery I would always haviing to stop her,I decided to stay away from her until I had my surgery.Unfortunately her surgery didnot  turn out well.I dont know why things happen as they do, So I am telling you all this because there are two sides to every story. Get all information you can,ask all the question and get all answers,prayer and then make your decision.Good luck have good thoughts. peace of mine.

Hi, I have my surgery date now and I know that I am not scared but you have my support 100% My parents and step parent are wanting me to have the surgery for years. I wish that I was able to have it done back in 2003 but was told that unless I was a diabetic, on my death bed that they would not cover me. Now I am a diabetic, have severe sleep apnea, I am now covered.  You need to believe in yourself and you can come on here and get help with just about any questions.  You are doing the right thing by getting the surgery.  I have only had my tonsils taken and a set of tubes put into my ears when I was a little girl.  I want to let you know that I believe in you.  I am sure I will be scared when the time comes for the surgery to actually happen.  Just remember you are having this done to save your own life and YOU have the POWER to tell your family that.

Congrats on getting a surgery date! Yea! As far as your family goes...they are probably a little bit worried for you, and maybe...jealous?  I come from a family where everybody is obese, or moridly overweight.  Nobody likes change, and anything unfamilar is scary.  It is okay to acknowlege those emotions, but dont let them control you.  yeah, easier said than done.  But...it is possible!  :o)  Seek out people that DO support you.  There are many here that can.  They either are, or have been in the exact same boat.
   As far as surgery goes...it isnt too bad.  :o) lol, I have had A LOT.  The weight loss surgery wasnt nearly so bad as like the one I had that is similar to a tummy tuck.  :o) BOTH are totally worth it though!  With the RNY, I lost over 200 pounds.  With the TT...25 pounds..(In 1 day!) They removed ALOT of extra skin.  After WLS, I also had to have my gallbladder taken out.  Then...I have also had a C-section.  So, you see, surgery really really isnt so bad.  :o) It is definately doable! 
    Oh, just in case you were interested, I am 11 1/2 years post op, from RNY.  I have never ever regreted it. For me, I was SOOO lucky to have it done when I was young, only 18 years old.  The only regret I have EVER heard from folks here, is that they DIDNT have surgery sooner.  lol, well, and there is a lot of debate over which WLS is best, but I think it depends on the person, not just the procedure. 
   Anyways, BEST of luck to you sweetie, I am sure you will be fine.  I will be thinking good thoughts for you.  Take care,
          ~Cora

 I am not sure if you had your surgery yet or not, so good luck if you have not. My biggest advice, is you have to do this for your self. I am getting ready for a revision, turns out my first did not heal correctly. I still say it changed my life all for the best, even with gainin most of it back. I learned to love to exercise, and miss it when i can't. learned how to eat better, and love, love the taste of vegetables that I never tried before, and not needing to have meat and potatoes all the time, like i was raised on. I had sme family support, and some not. My own mother tried to support me, but she is also overweight, and it seemed like she was happy when i was failing, because i was not doing better then her. I learned how to tune that out, and only take the positive. I was able to do things with my daughter who was 6, that I could not do before, and my health improved. no more cpap machine and other things.  My rny, was my first surgery ever, and they took my gallbladder at the same time. You will do great :) You will need at least one person around to help you after, you do have to learn to let that person, help alot at first. For me it was my husband. You cannot push too hard too fast, and let your body heal. And its nice to walk with someone. Good luck and if you ever need to chat, look me up :)
AJ