Looking for Penpal Support
I have everything ready to go to insurance EXCEPT approval from my psychologist. Seems that once I got my eating under control my shopping impulsivity took control and I just can't seem to get a grip on it. Until I do she won't approve me for surgery. Would anyone be willing to lend me support in this struggle? I promise I give as good as I get! I live in Tennessee, at the very base of the Smoky Mountains, but I'd be happy to hear from anyone from anywhere!
Rebecca
Rebecca
Hey Rebecca,
My name is Cate and I had surgery April 18 2008.... I still have a long way to go... started out at 378 am now 251, and boy do I still have a long way to go. So when you think about shopping write me what is bothering you and we will work this out... I live in sunny california.. I am 50 years old... have three children 23,22,21 and i love them to death one son two daughters.. so how about you??? tell me something about you...
Cate 48
My name is Cate and I had surgery April 18 2008.... I still have a long way to go... started out at 378 am now 251, and boy do I still have a long way to go. So when you think about shopping write me what is bothering you and we will work this out... I live in sunny california.. I am 50 years old... have three children 23,22,21 and i love them to death one son two daughters.. so how about you??? tell me something about you...
Cate 48
Hi Cate,
Thank you so much for answering my cry for help! It gets awfully lonely out here on the battlefield sometimes.
Let's see, what to write about me...I'm 46 and forever single it seems. Too many issues with men that have yet to be dealt with. As a result, I've never had any kids which is sad but perhaps a blessing for the kids I may have had. My therapist and I are just beginning to scratch the surface of that can of worms.
I'm from Tennessee originally but actually grew up as a navy brat, following my dad from base to base around the country until he retired and we returned to Tennessee in 1981. Since then I've continued the legacy of moving a bit, having lived in various places around the state then for four years in Wyoming, first in Yellowstone then near Cody. My mom's failing health brought me back home in 2000 and about then is when my spending and eating, always a problem, really spiraled out of control. I gained about 70 lbs in seven years to reach my all time high of 321. As of this morning, I'm now back down to 278.
When my mom finally passed away last summer I never really fully grieved for her loss. I felt I needed to be strong for my father and, frankly, I didn't know what to do with all those emotions. Added to this was some unresolved hurt, especially from things that happened in her final days. I have come to believe that a lot of my problems, which seem to have climaxed this past year, stem from this time. My therapist, like the majority of those in this area, is a cognitive behaviorist so she doesn't do too much delving into the reasons we do things. Rather she concentrates on changing our choice of response. I, on the other hand, need to understand the reasons why before I can change the behavior. It makes for a very frustrating therapy session sometimes.
So there's the essence of me in a nutshell. Not very pretty, is it? Actually, I can say a few good things about myself. I have a great sense of humor when I'm not being maudlin (which I'm happy to say is getting less and less frequent) and a keen sense of the ridiculous, I enjoy writing poetry and I love indulging my passion for nature photography and I'm a bonafide animal lover, which is a good thing since I work in a veterinary teaching hospital.
Jeez, I didn't mean to write a book! I hope I haven't put you off! Anyway, thanks again for offering to help. I do appreciate it far more than I could ever hope to convey. If you don't mind, I'll send a "friend request" notice that can link us if you are still willing.
I hope you have a wonderful Friday.
Rebecca
Thank you so much for answering my cry for help! It gets awfully lonely out here on the battlefield sometimes.
Let's see, what to write about me...I'm 46 and forever single it seems. Too many issues with men that have yet to be dealt with. As a result, I've never had any kids which is sad but perhaps a blessing for the kids I may have had. My therapist and I are just beginning to scratch the surface of that can of worms.
I'm from Tennessee originally but actually grew up as a navy brat, following my dad from base to base around the country until he retired and we returned to Tennessee in 1981. Since then I've continued the legacy of moving a bit, having lived in various places around the state then for four years in Wyoming, first in Yellowstone then near Cody. My mom's failing health brought me back home in 2000 and about then is when my spending and eating, always a problem, really spiraled out of control. I gained about 70 lbs in seven years to reach my all time high of 321. As of this morning, I'm now back down to 278.
When my mom finally passed away last summer I never really fully grieved for her loss. I felt I needed to be strong for my father and, frankly, I didn't know what to do with all those emotions. Added to this was some unresolved hurt, especially from things that happened in her final days. I have come to believe that a lot of my problems, which seem to have climaxed this past year, stem from this time. My therapist, like the majority of those in this area, is a cognitive behaviorist so she doesn't do too much delving into the reasons we do things. Rather she concentrates on changing our choice of response. I, on the other hand, need to understand the reasons why before I can change the behavior. It makes for a very frustrating therapy session sometimes.
So there's the essence of me in a nutshell. Not very pretty, is it? Actually, I can say a few good things about myself. I have a great sense of humor when I'm not being maudlin (which I'm happy to say is getting less and less frequent) and a keen sense of the ridiculous, I enjoy writing poetry and I love indulging my passion for nature photography and I'm a bonafide animal lover, which is a good thing since I work in a veterinary teaching hospital.
Jeez, I didn't mean to write a book! I hope I haven't put you off! Anyway, thanks again for offering to help. I do appreciate it far more than I could ever hope to convey. If you don't mind, I'll send a "friend request" notice that can link us if you are still willing.
I hope you have a wonderful Friday.
Rebecca
Hi Rebecca,
Never say forever single... unless you want to be that is... I have issues with men.... and I have notice not everyone but a lot of women with weight problem do... I learn as a child to move very quickly when the men in our house were around.. I was married for twenty years to a man I thought was my soul mate... found out he had lied almost about everything..which put my trust in men right back where it started.. I have a therapist that i like very much she has help me deal with a lot of issues and tells me i should write a book about my childhood... it really was that strange... I live at home with my 21 yr old daughter and my mother move in with me last year.. she will be 84 this comming Aug 27.. She a sweet mom and I love her very much... Right now my grandson is visting me from Alaska.. and I am having so much fun I took him to build a bear in the mall and he made a T-Rex it is fun being a grandmother because you get to spoil them rotten and no guilt. I had my RNY april 18 and Its been great so far, but i want to be skinny and beautiful right now and this is such a process.. And some times all i want to do is go in a courner and eat oreo's... I still love my sweets... I have one cat name marmalade he is about 13 yrs old and one dog sasha she is about 12 just had to put down one of my old cats a few weeks ago, and that is always so hard ...So how has the shopping been???What makes you decide to start shopping and if you don't mind me asking how bad is it??/ I also have a sense of humor and love to laugh.. my favorite show is the new adventures of old christine for some reason it just makes me laugh ... Tell me more about your self our you a only child... I look forward to hearing from you..
Your Truly
Cate
Never say forever single... unless you want to be that is... I have issues with men.... and I have notice not everyone but a lot of women with weight problem do... I learn as a child to move very quickly when the men in our house were around.. I was married for twenty years to a man I thought was my soul mate... found out he had lied almost about everything..which put my trust in men right back where it started.. I have a therapist that i like very much she has help me deal with a lot of issues and tells me i should write a book about my childhood... it really was that strange... I live at home with my 21 yr old daughter and my mother move in with me last year.. she will be 84 this comming Aug 27.. She a sweet mom and I love her very much... Right now my grandson is visting me from Alaska.. and I am having so much fun I took him to build a bear in the mall and he made a T-Rex it is fun being a grandmother because you get to spoil them rotten and no guilt. I had my RNY april 18 and Its been great so far, but i want to be skinny and beautiful right now and this is such a process.. And some times all i want to do is go in a courner and eat oreo's... I still love my sweets... I have one cat name marmalade he is about 13 yrs old and one dog sasha she is about 12 just had to put down one of my old cats a few weeks ago, and that is always so hard ...So how has the shopping been???What makes you decide to start shopping and if you don't mind me asking how bad is it??/ I also have a sense of humor and love to laugh.. my favorite show is the new adventures of old christine for some reason it just makes me laugh ... Tell me more about your self our you a only child... I look forward to hearing from you..
Your Truly
Cate
Hi Cate,
I, too, have noticed that there seems to be a link between weight and issues with men. I wonder if there have been any formal studies into the phenomenon?
I'm the eldest of four and the only daughter. That made me an "instant mommy" and our mom often said that I practically raised my two youngest brothers. A good friend of mine says that I was more like the middle child with my parents being the eldest and my brothers the youngest. My parents were quite young when I was born. Dad was 17 and Mom was 19. Right now I live with my Dad in a double wide trailer on the family farm and between the two of us we have quite the menagerie: my two indoor dogs, his two outdoor dogs and we both inherited Mom's six indoor/outdoor cats.
The shopping is "red lighting" at the moment. Rather like the rattle of a snake's tail as its curled up threatening to strike. I've noticed these past few days my eating is being a little more difficult to control than it had been being, too. I'm definitely poised for flight here. Payday is approaching and rather than being a time of relief it brings me stress. Having money is stressful. I have this all consuming urge to get rid of it by shopping and eating out. It's like, if I don't spend it now I won't have it tomorrow. How bizarre is that???
I won't ever know the joy of kids or grandkids. I had thermo uterine ablation done a few years ago to treat a problem I was having and as part of the procedure they tied my tubes. It took me a year to decide to have it done but I finally decided that having never dated and at 40 with no prospects on the horizon (not many interested in 321 lbs ladies), it was a moot point to argue. I've never really regretted the decision, but a part of me wishes that my whole life could have been different with a storybook marriage and model kids. The whole fantasy deal. Maybe its good that I never had to have my bubble burst.
Well, I think I'm going to go rustle me up a healthy breakfast and prepare to start my day. I have a seminar to attend today that I'm really looking forward to. I hope you have a wonderful day.
Always,
Rebecca
I, too, have noticed that there seems to be a link between weight and issues with men. I wonder if there have been any formal studies into the phenomenon?
I'm the eldest of four and the only daughter. That made me an "instant mommy" and our mom often said that I practically raised my two youngest brothers. A good friend of mine says that I was more like the middle child with my parents being the eldest and my brothers the youngest. My parents were quite young when I was born. Dad was 17 and Mom was 19. Right now I live with my Dad in a double wide trailer on the family farm and between the two of us we have quite the menagerie: my two indoor dogs, his two outdoor dogs and we both inherited Mom's six indoor/outdoor cats.
The shopping is "red lighting" at the moment. Rather like the rattle of a snake's tail as its curled up threatening to strike. I've noticed these past few days my eating is being a little more difficult to control than it had been being, too. I'm definitely poised for flight here. Payday is approaching and rather than being a time of relief it brings me stress. Having money is stressful. I have this all consuming urge to get rid of it by shopping and eating out. It's like, if I don't spend it now I won't have it tomorrow. How bizarre is that???
I won't ever know the joy of kids or grandkids. I had thermo uterine ablation done a few years ago to treat a problem I was having and as part of the procedure they tied my tubes. It took me a year to decide to have it done but I finally decided that having never dated and at 40 with no prospects on the horizon (not many interested in 321 lbs ladies), it was a moot point to argue. I've never really regretted the decision, but a part of me wishes that my whole life could have been different with a storybook marriage and model kids. The whole fantasy deal. Maybe its good that I never had to have my bubble burst.
Well, I think I'm going to go rustle me up a healthy breakfast and prepare to start my day. I have a seminar to attend today that I'm really looking forward to. I hope you have a wonderful day.
Always,
Rebecca
Hi Rebecca,
I am so sorry that it has taken me so long to get back to you.. but that grandson of mine is really making me tired... he has so much energy... Well I am going to my daughter in Alaska on the third of sept.. to take my grandson home and then vist with her for awhile... I can't wait she move about a year ago when she got married to her high school sweetheart.. he is in the air force... boy this week has been really hard all i want to do is eat... yeah i know they made my stomach smaller.... but there are days when i am not so sure... yesterday a man at the market actually said excuse me young lady... usually when i like was 400 they would just push pass me like a was not there... small victory but i will take it...You know it is not to late to have kids I adopted my three and they were the best thing i ever did... thats if you wanted one .... but they are alot of work..... Well i will write later very tired now ... want to watch some scifi ..am i not a geek or what.
Your Friend
Cate
I am so sorry that it has taken me so long to get back to you.. but that grandson of mine is really making me tired... he has so much energy... Well I am going to my daughter in Alaska on the third of sept.. to take my grandson home and then vist with her for awhile... I can't wait she move about a year ago when she got married to her high school sweetheart.. he is in the air force... boy this week has been really hard all i want to do is eat... yeah i know they made my stomach smaller.... but there are days when i am not so sure... yesterday a man at the market actually said excuse me young lady... usually when i like was 400 they would just push pass me like a was not there... small victory but i will take it...You know it is not to late to have kids I adopted my three and they were the best thing i ever did... thats if you wanted one .... but they are alot of work..... Well i will write later very tired now ... want to watch some scifi ..am i not a geek or what.
Your Friend
Cate
Hi Cate,
Now its my turn to apologize for taking so long to respond. My mind has been everywhere but on my responsibilities lately.
I hope you have a great trip to Alaska. I used to live on Adak, way out on the Aleution chain. Lived there for six years. It was a great place to grow up. The whole state is beautiful. I'd love to go back and visit someday.
I received a letter from my surgeon's office over the weekend. Seems my surgeon is packing up and moving to South Carolina at the end of the month so I'll have to choose from the remaining two in the clinic. They're nice enough guys, and super competent, but they just don't have Dr. Scott's easy bedside manner. Oh well. I guess you can't have everything.
Well, it's getting time for me to close up shop and head for home. As I said, I hope you have a great trip. Take care.
Always,
Rebecca
Now its my turn to apologize for taking so long to respond. My mind has been everywhere but on my responsibilities lately.
I hope you have a great trip to Alaska. I used to live on Adak, way out on the Aleution chain. Lived there for six years. It was a great place to grow up. The whole state is beautiful. I'd love to go back and visit someday.
I received a letter from my surgeon's office over the weekend. Seems my surgeon is packing up and moving to South Carolina at the end of the month so I'll have to choose from the remaining two in the clinic. They're nice enough guys, and super competent, but they just don't have Dr. Scott's easy bedside manner. Oh well. I guess you can't have everything.
Well, it's getting time for me to close up shop and head for home. As I said, I hope you have a great trip. Take care.
Always,
Rebecca
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