R U tired of people blaming your weight for your pain?!!!!

It's been a while since I've been on this site. My computer has been down (and still is. I am at my library)

I am getting fed up with being in constant pain.....and even more fed up with everyone saying, "All that weight is causing your pain."  Or "If you lost more weight, you would feel better."  Etc.etc. blah blah blah!!!!!!  Even when I tell them I've lost 120 lbs, they size me up and say I still need to lose more and my pains will go away once I do!!!  (hmmmm, I wonder how much pain they would feel if I jammed my foot up their.........Um, ok....moving on.....) 

Anyone else going through this? Any snappy comebacks would certainly be nice if any one has any. Thank you in advance. 

I try to ignore the comments from the non-medical people, because really if they're saying rude things like that, education isn't going to help them.  Or I change the subject by asking them about something completely unrelated - some get the hint.

As for the medical people (note I'm not saying professionals) when they have said things like this I tell them they're wrong, ask them if they have read the research, and when I have the chance - like I do often with my family doctor - bring in medical articles and books about this condition.  With some I have seen I change and have received more help.  With some not, but tough.  I've learned more about this condition than most of them know and I'm going to keep standing up for myself.

Good luck!

The worst is when the so called medical people make those comments! I can excuse regular folks cause they are just ignorant but the medical people should be more aware of the condition. Even my PCP who is good and does give me pain meds still says I'd have less pain if I lost weight. So what happens IF I lose all the weight and I still hurt? Cause that's what is gonna happen and as long as I hurt it's pretty doubtful I'm gonna hit the gym! I guess it's just one more thing we get to deal with having fibro.

Speaking on the whole gym thing. That's what I'm really pissed about right now. I had to go to my yearly gyno appt Thursday morning and I told the nurse about what was going on and that I had just had RNY 3 1/2 weeks ago, and she seemed to "get it" pretty much. The doc came in ans started doing his usual speel about everything and I told him about the "flare up" that's goin on right now, so when I had to lay back for my breast exam and put my arm above my head, my shoulder wpuldnt allow me to let it rest down on the table. Talk about ouch. He understood and finished as soon as he could and still do his job. When I was getting ready to leave he said that the only thing that he was gona recommend was to try to lose weight, but it seemed I already had that part covered. THEN, here comes the big one...Are you exercising yet? No, I told him, one of the main reasons I had this surgery was for my spinal osteoarthritis, and that I had to go on disability because I can barely make it through a grocery store without having to rest and then limping out to my car. So I had the surgery and NOW, I've got the fibro issue for the last 10 days, and I can barely walk, stretch, sleep, or do anything that requires "muscle." Here it goes, " well you could still try the elliptical machine or something like that (he begins to act out and describe what it does, like I'm such a fat piece of crap that I dont even know what an elliptical machine looks like or does...P.O.'d). I assured him that when I can get get some pain in check and feels physically able I caertainly plan on excersizing to the best of my ability. He just stood there and stared at me. Did he not get it. I just told him I could barely walk before and now the fibro kicked in...big time! The medical field does just not "get it" or understand what we go through. For me right now, it hurts to try and wipe myself for Gods sake and exercising at this moment is not on my first 3 things I NEED to have addressed. This isnt just after the fibro issue either. This has happened over a few years with countless medical professionals, because exercising will make me feel better even thoughstand errect for more than 20-30 min is excrutiating. Aaauuuggg! Sorry again for all the "ventalation", It just helps to have people listen, that actually know the same difficulties I have. Hope everybody can find some sort of relief in the near future. Thanks again for lending me your ears, well, eyes.......

I know what you mean. I hurt to walk even 20 steps!!!! No one understands when we say we are in pain we mean PAIN. They are thinking like a minor headache.
We here all understand you.

Vent all you want we do understand.
Pam

well I have arthritis so bad in my neck, shoulders elbows,plus I have 2  artitifical knees and one shoulder. I do NOt walk on my shoudlers or neck; so how does weight affect it??? But yes they say that all the time weight is blamed for everything. it stops them from finding the "real" problem.

Another thing they don't get is that we have a very delicate balance in how much we can exercise. Too much and we are in pain for days, not enough and it doesn't accomplish anything. If we go gungho one day we may pay for it for a week. They seem to think if we just work thru the pain that it'll be OK, not so! Also they have no concept of how severe the pain is, they seem to think we are big babies that can't take a little muscle ache. They don't understand it isn't a minor ache it is excruciating pain! I wish all of them had to live with the pain for a month, maybe then the would have a small idea of what we live with everyday.

Forget walking a month in our shoes, I would give it 2-3 days tops....Maybe even less for men!!!

Ain't that the truth!!!

hi Im new here so I hope its okay if I chime in here too. When I was diagnosed with fibro I weighed 145 pounds. All of the medications I have been put on in an attempt to control the pain over the years to say nothing of the surgeries i have undergone since being diagnosed in 1997 have packed the pounds back on so now I am up to 227 again. I have had more than one medical professional tell me I should lose the extra weight to help with my pain levels. After having fibro while slim and having it while overweight I can say from experience... My weight does not really affect my pain scale. Yes it is harder to do the things i love at this weight and yes it is contributing to other health issues but as far as my FMS goes, the pain is the pain is the pain. Unless i over do then I pay big time. One lesson I have learned over the years, if I have to go to a new doctor I find out what they know about FMS. If they blow me off about it or ignore it all together I find a different doc. As far as regular people go i usually dont bring up my FMS unless specifically asked about it. because quite frankly if you arent visibly sick people dont want to be educated about your "issues." If someone suggests I need to lose weight I just tell them I am pregnant. When they back up and ask when Im due I just laugh and tell them Im just kidding. That usually leaves them pretty flustered which they deserve for being rude as heck about something that isnt their business. And its quite interesting how suddenly they have somewhere else to be... now! lol
Really you just have to take some people with a grain of salt