I need help

I'm not sure what to do. My mother as well as myself have battled with our weight our entire lives. I am 26, her only child, and just had my first child (her first grandchild). I have expressed to her as best as I feel I can that her weight/health is worrying me but it doesn't seem to have any affect on her. Now that I am a new mom (my daughter is 2 1/2 months old) my worrying has gotten even worse. I not only am scared that I am going to lose my mother but that my daughter is going to lose her only living grandparent as well. She is over 350lbs and has back/knee problems but the thing that is scaring me the most are the sores she gets on her legs. They look like something a diabetic would have even though she swears her sugar levels are fine. She also has had sleep apnea for the last 15 years that has only gotten worse as she's gained weight. I am not sure how to approach the topic with her because just like me if she feels like she's being attacked she will just shut you out. But subtlety doesn't seem to work either. I am at such a loss and so scared of losing her I don't know what to do. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. 

My mom has surgery last year at 72, lost almost 100 lbs and acts 15 years younger and is so happy she did this. And so am I!!

See if there is a weightloss surgery support group in your area and take her to it to be introduced to the idea?

Good luck.

Hey, 
I think, you can easily convince her with the help of your family doctor or a good counselor. She might don't aware of her health issue so help her to know about her problems and its after effects. All the very best.

The hardest thing we humans have to face is that we can not force others to do things. Not even our children. The beat we can do is provide our guidance and advice. But in the end they must choose. Be it that alcohol, drugs, food, activity or any other behavior.

so if you find a time when your mom is in an open and receptive mood where the two of you can talk, ask her about her health goals. Listen to her feelings. There are people who choose not to change their behaviors because they have no interest in prolonging their lives. Some people really feel, "Why stop smoking, drinking, and eating fried foods? Why should I stop the few thing that bring any pleasure to my miserable existence." Which is why you have to let her talk and you listen. If someone is depressed, or can't see that their current behavior is bad for them, nothing you say will influence them.

However you might learn that they are scared, to not thing there is a solution that will work for them. If that is the case, they may be open to make a change if you can provide calm and thought through advice.

But you have to do a lot of listening first.

Best of luck!