Best Way to Give Support

My wife had an RNY back in December. She's been struggling with her Diabetes slowing down her weight loss. I've tried to get her to join the site to post questions, share support, info etc. So far she's resisted.

What's the best way I can show her support without being guilty of nagging?

I can tell you the worst thing is pointing out what may be bad food choices to your wife. Not sure if you do it, but some people do without realizing even if they mean well. Yeah, I know what made me fat and I know that backing away from the cookie is a good idea. Crazy as it sounds, it's easier said than done. We all know what food choices that need to be made to aid in the success, we dont need someone nagging over our shoulder constantly making us feel bad if we choose to eat something.

I can't speak with absolute certainty because I have the band, but I think the body does slow down with the loss at different points after the surgery. Shes newly out, so she needs to expect some delays. Does she weigh everyday? I think thats a big mistake all newbies make. The numbers move quickly in the beginning and when a person quits losing super duper fast, there is a tendency to freak out. Her body may simply be leveling out.

As far as support, help your wife avoid buying "trigger" foods. Those are the foods that trigger overeating, whether it be chips, cookies, candy, crackers, etc., Don't request them to be bought for you or expect your wife to cook unhealthy food for you if you know it is something that could entice her to overindulge. Encourage exercise by joining your wife in activities. Go the mall and walk if the weather is bad, ask her to walk in the evenings after dinner. Just show her that you are willing to make changes too.

OH is a great site. Reading profiles and stories can be a great source of information (and even relief when you learn that something is normal). Maybe she can just browse through profiles and then eventually she will feel comfortable enough to post on a message board. Often times, someone else may have already asked the very question that your wife is wanting to ask, so just browsing through the message boards can be very beneficial. Don't shove it down her throat...if she wants to utilize OH, she will in her own time.....

It's strange in a way.  She hasn't had any "cravings" for anything yet.  She's just been frustrated that her weight loss is slower than others that had the surgery at the same time.  She's also been getting conflicting opinions from her doc, dietitian etc.

I've tried to be supportive without nagging. I'm not sure if I'm succeeding 100 percent or not. As for the exercise, I've been trying to camouflage it in trips to the mall or the zoo if the weather's nice.

Thank you for your advice. I appreciate it.