Having a hard time..

Hey everyone... I know what kind of advice I'm going to get but I'm having a hard time with something and I really need advice even if it's not what I want to hear. One of my best friends back home is 23 years old. We were THE best of buds when I was in Iowa. She was the only one who knew EVERYTHING (good and bad) about me. Guy mistakes, drinking mistakes, etc. Anyway, I've tried calling a couple of times and never a response. I saw her last time I was home in May and she told me she had been really busy but she missed me. Fast forward ~ I finally got a myspace page and have requested her to be my friend... she has like 300 or something... and she denied it. Then I sent an email yesterday to her (cause I had this crazy dream about her) and told her I missed her and had a crazy dream and just want to know if she is okay. I ended it with just a quick email to say you are okay would be good.. I also said, I hope I haven't made you mad, how could I, I live 400 miles away. HAHA... no response even though I know she read it. i realize she is a partier and has a life but I've been there for her through everything including her brother's suicide and her asshole guys... And she was there through my weight loss and asshole guys...so what gives? I know I've done all I can but it doesn't make it any easier. Mark tells me I need to jsut let it go. I've been gone over a year now and apparently my friendship meant nothing to her so I'm having a hard time... Any suggestions???

do not base anything on myspace. call this person & talk directly. if she is not responsive....i'm sorry to say move on....even if just temporary. (sp) maybe she is just in a funk right now. (I know I have not responded to my friends & its nothing they have done, its just that I was in a place where I had completely withdrawn from the world) maybe she will come around more so later? I know it sucks. I'm sorry.

I know I shouldn't take MySpace to heart but how can you just ignore emails on it? I understand the funk too. She is kind of a drama queen... (not in a bad way ~ she just takes things really personal ~ even the littlest thing) So everything in her life could be turning upside down but if you reach out and say you are worried, what is so hard about answering and saying "I'm fine".... I want more, but that is all I need to know. Thanks for the insight Kellee dear!!

I agree with Mark.....easier said than done I know. BUT, if you have to "beg" someone to be a friend and respond to etc., then they arent much of a friend. You clearly reached out to her, now the next move is up to her. She may not respond immediately, she may not repsond ever, just keep in mind that you have considered her to be a friend. If she does reach out to you eventually, let her know how her actions, or lack there of, have affected you. Being the type of person you are, I know you would never turn your back on her. Focus your energy on those people that have been there for you and will continue to be there for you. Hard I know, but she is probably one of those "seasonal" friends rather than a lifetime one. Take the good you have learned from her along with the good and bad memories you have together and be thankful that you had that time.

You are so smart and you made me tear up at work, you ho! You and Stef pretty much said the same thing. I just don't understand. You and I met on a board and are soul sisters and would do anything for each other and haven't gone through half of what she and I have and I can't believe she is willing to give it up. I PROBABLY wouldn't turn my back on her but who knows. I'm hurt and god knows she has turned her back on me.. but it hurts. Did I just type that AGAIN? Thanks love.... Enjoy your stupid fun this weekend! But I'm sure I'll talk to you soon!!

the internet has been the source of sooo many misunderstandings and sore feelings when people feel they're been ignored. I wouldn't take it too seriously. You never know what the other person is truly thinking, feeling or doing. I wouldn't worry about it. You might want to try to reach her through other means but i wouldn't let the lack of response to myspace or email bring you down. i've almost lost a few friends over similar cir****tances. And yet years later we're still good friends who keep in touch. And we feel silly now about the hurt feelings that were due to lack of responses in email and yahoo. Can't you just call her? If not i'd just chill and be open minded, otherwise you're just gonna hurt yourself over what might be a misunderstanding.

I haven't called her recently because before when I would see her on visits, she always had a .. "Oh I meant to call" or "I never got you message" so I stopped trying but SHE would always say "get a myspace, I'm always on there". I also found out through a mutual friend that she didnt' have a phone for a while. So now I have Myspace and she won't answer. I know what everyone says makes sense but to have someone be part of your life for so long and have it seem like she jsut dosen't care sucks the big asshole.... Thanks Jay.

did she decline your offer to be your friend on MYSPACE... or you just haven't gotten a response.. .. can you tell if she's been on myspace recently.. it usually says. sorry you are going thru this.. you've gotten great advice... I personally wouldn't write her off.. but leave it to her to just make the next move when she's ready.

She was on MySpace last night.. early this am... Pretty sure she declined cause she isn't on mine and she didn't send an email and both are out of my sent boxes. I really want to just smack her and say (not to be conceited) that I'm one of the most loyal friends she will ever have... And she is willing to toss it aside... Now, instead of hurt, I'm getting very angry!! but not at you!

I'm at a loss of what to suggest, just give you support. My college roommate and I (now) live in the same city. 2 yrs ago, I called her (after she told me 15 yr ago "we just have nothing in common anymore" and then 4 yrs ago she mailed me a post card and acted like we were best friends). A man answered the phone, her husband who I was also friends with, and asked for Michelle. Long story short, she still hasn't called me. So a. he didn't tell her or b. she doesn't want to talk. I've left it up to her. And Kellee's right, I wouldn't base anything on myspace. My personal belief is myspace is the devil because of the problems it causes relationships and people in the public's eye. I digress.... Call her and ask if she got your email. If she says yes, but doesn't elaborate or add anything after that, then you have your answer. I'm sorry. I know it hurts. I was supposed to be in Michelle's wedding, but that's when we "grew apart", but oddly enough it was told to me the day I left her house from picking out my maid of honor dress. I heard her mom in the background tell her "she's just too fat to be in the wedding". And yet, I was a sorority girl; wasn't too fat for them. Liz