Morning people!

Someone help me figure out a way to stratigically get fired. I refuse to quit because I will not be granted unemployment. I could say I work in a hostile work environment...I have documentation over the past 12 years I've been here proving so. I've been here 12 years...I'm slightly pissed right now. My boss does not have a way with words by any means. My main fear...I have this bird who lives in my office...no lie. His names George, umbrella ****atoo that some one ditched at one of our front doors, my boss told me to get the bird handleable, so he's lived here for over a year now, sweet as a button. I've got this bird to do a complete turn around. Handleable, loveable, doesn't scream anymore, just a dream to have. I know my boss won't let me take a bird that is worth thousands of dollars(even tho someone ditched him here). His cage and play pen are worth a good thousand bucks. I've given myself a headache over the past 20 minutes pondering this and grinding my teeth. help....

Steel the bird.. that should get you fired.. and then you would have the bird.. and no job.. .. altho.. steeling from a company may reflect in rather you get unemployment

Morning Lizzie! Hmmmmm......how about stripping naked and running through the office? Well....no....your boss might LIKE that. Ummmmmm......forcing yourself to throw up on his desk? Pooping in his chair? Just a thought!

Start a rumour you saw your boss in a gay bar giving some big ole biker dude tongue. Make sure you tell the right people so it gets back to him. That just just about do it. Then when he takes you in his office shut the door and scream! Yep that'll do it!