this and that

i like it here......it's comfortable..... i love getting to know about other peoples lives .... marriages .... dates ..... children .... pets and all the other stuff... and making new friends with similar interests and not getting in trouble for asking a question or being married ** i am married (13years in Aug) ** i have 4 kids (21, 20, 11, and 6) ** 1 grandaughter, she's 1, and one due in Oct ** 1 horse, 1 pony, 2 big dogs (black lab and golden retriever) 1 bunny, and about 7 barn kitties ** i run a home childcare business , Cosmic Kids we do a lot of family activities.... just went camping with Rhonda, Dan, Chris, Budda, and Kat a few weekends ago ... it was so much fun... i also came to the realization that as much as i love my family i need to start to focus on ME. i now ask for your support..... everyone has their own addictions of some sort.... i don't know if this would be considered that or just that i think i *need*.... i don't graze anymore.... on food that is.... i seem to head towards medication..... i had an awakening that it doesnt matter what kind even..... Ambien every night (4 or more) adderall, no doz, tylenol, vicodin, i just grab something when i pass it, . I've never taken too many due to the fact that i care for children but i'm wondering when (not *if* ) i might not realize it . Please don't judge me for what i've posted. i just know that someone here will have advice i can use *Tina*

I will never judge you.. I will only want the best for YOU My advise is to call and make an appointment to talk to a counselor that deals with addictions.. and do it TODAY... then go and speak nothing but the truth to him/her. If you go and not speak full truths.. you are only hurting YOUR healing process... no one elses, but YOURSELF... Also go and post on the Addictions Board.. there are many there that are in or walked in your shoes. They give wonderful advise and can lead you in the right direction.. I would also recommend finding a NA meeting to attend.. AA is for alcoholics Anon. and NA is Narcotics Anon... you may also want to talk to Theresa from Upper.. she is a recovering NA and has been for several years. The first step is admitting there is a problem.. and now you can start the healing process. It took courage to post some very personal information.. and to ask for help.. so that shows you do have it in you to face and deal with it.. once you do, it relieves so much inner demons that comes with addictions. I promise.. the other side is soo much better. love you and you can always call me

I could be there so easily. Not so much sleeping pills but pain pills. Although I hate the crappy feeling after a couple of days and don't take anymore. I wouldn't go so far as call it an addiction with me yet (then again I could be talkin out my you know what) but I will admitt to a "fondness" for them. I guess it's something I watch closely. We all have our demons and we have to fight them constantly. I supose food was everyone here's demon at some point and still may be for some. ALthough your addiction to food is right up front and you can't hide the effects of it. People see you, your fat and they know. Drink and drugs can be hidden and people don't typically base their first impression on your addiction. Funny thing is I remember when I was younger and I didn't have a weight problem I was so judgemental of everyone and everything. Being fat has taught me so much. I can't say as I would go back and change a thing just for the simple fact that I like who I've become in my old age, a tolerant, forgiving, less judgemental person. ((((Tina)))) You can do this and We are here for ya. Battles are battles no matter what or who with. Just the fact that you see the problem means you've got it 50% beat. Hugs, Sparky

.. not changing a thing... isnt' that the truth Sparkie.. I think I've even said something about that in my profile.. I've learned to be Thankful for my addictions.. it's made me a more caring and loving and forgiving person.

Yep Makes us who we are. I kinda like me better and I think you're the livin end! Sparky

Hi Tina, I just finally wondered over here myself, and to my surprise you posted about something near and dear to my heart. Like Rhonda said, I am a recovering addict and have been clean for 21 years plus a few months. I started in AA but when NA came to Escanaba I literally *found a home*. I don't know if you're an "addict," you're the only one that can determine that. My suggestion? Find a meeting in your area by searching this link http://www.naohio.org/Meeting%20Schedules.htm and attend. If you can't figure out the web site there should be a number on there that you can call for assistance. If you're not comfortable saying you're an addict then don't. I think you'll find the people friendly and informative, at least that's been the case with any NA meeting I've ever gone to. Now, if you don't want to go alone Rhonda qualifies as well (Hi Rhonda ) and maybe could go with you. Again, just a suggestion. Just please know that you are NOT alone. So many people think an addict is someone living on skid row and really, more times than not, they are everyday people that do everyday things. Addiction does not discriminate and can afflict anyone of any race, sexual orientation, and so on. If you need anything or have any other questions just ask. If you want I can PM you my phone number and we can talk. Once again, just a suggestion. Take care and please know that you are NOT being judged and most importantly you are NA - NEVER ALONE. Theresa

Hi Theresa... Thanks so much.. I knew you would have some good advise and welcum to the BOARD

i don't know what to call it.... i know that it has caused me to worry and if I am to the point of recognizing certain behaviors then i need to take some type of step to fix it.... i also know that i have an addictive personality which is the reason i am extremely careful about my alcohol use, and why i never smoked (that and i am too cheap to spend money on ciggs) Ambien's all gone and I am not refilling no doz down the drain well it's a start anyhow i knew you guys would have some great advice for me.... thank you sooooo much

Hey, I sleep with either several benadryl or nyquil. I cannot fall asleep for anything without something. Ambien did nothing for me and that was before surgery. My pcp was going to give me the Ambien CR last Friday and I said, "uh, does it even stay in me long enough to work?" The answer is no, it doesn't. So that keeping you asleep all night thing is crap for me. I have to admit, kinda like Sparky, I loved pain meds. I've never been an addict to them or the benadryl/nyquil (gone many nights/days/weeks with out) but I like the stoned feel I get from codeine and demerol. Well, the demerol injections that give me 15 minutes to drive home so I can sleep through a 20 hour migraine. You're not alone...

Hey! Have you asked your Dr about Triazadone. I take it nightly, non addicting. It takes me through all stages of sleep. It makes me drowsy enough to fall asleep and I sleep through the night without feeling groggy when I wake up. Hope this helps you. Julie