10 years and 40 lb gained

Hi Everyone. I can't believe it's been this long since I've been part of the wonderful community that helped me to loose all my weight. I'm inspired reading everyones post. For a while I thought I was doing great maintaining my weight and realized it was normal to regain a few pounds after surgery. I continued to tell myself that for the past 6 years and today I look up and I am obese and miserable. I do know that my weight loss was a success but to some level I ignored the fact that it was a very real possibility that I could gain weight if I stopped excersising and ate poorly. I'm here as a reminder of the things that motivated me to loose in the first place. My entire family is overweight and no one seems to understand how I feel about being 190lb right now. They just keep saying "at least you're not as fat as before" My highest was 278. For a split second that gives me some comfort but it doesn't exactly change how I feel. I've been up and down hovering between 170-190 for years. My lowest was 147 and I loved how I felt. This time it just feels absolutely wrong for me to have gained 40+ pounds and content with that.

Just looking at this website and all of your success has definately motivated me to stay on and work toward my inital weight loss goal from 2002 of 130lbs. One day at a time. Thanks for reading and I welcome any suggestions or feed back.

The hardest thing is to know what you are capable of and not quite being able to acheive because you're in your own way.

 

Thanks for sharing.  I'm struggling with the title "failed" weight loss surgery.  I think what you're describing and what I"m feeling is probably pretty normal.  I know that for me - I've lived 45 years with my body/brain and a weird relationship with food.  I've been away from OH for several months, justifying my poor food choices (peanut butter) and now as I'm approaching my first year I'm facing a reality that I won't come close to losing the 100 pounds that most people lose so quickly (or at least those who post here seem to have lost).  I don't want to feel like a failure because I"m afraid that will trigger even more poor choices.  I wish there was a forum on her for those of us who just want to be honest and keep working without the "F" word. 

 

Hang in there.  I really think you're doing an amazing job and acknowledging where/when you made decisions that could have been better really is important and will help you going forward. 

Jaybee

I think the main forum would be a place to post when everything is working alright.  Lots of people lose slower than 100 lbs. in a year.  I would think that this forum would put doubts in your mind about the surgery working for you.  It is more than losing quickly.  Do you feel restriction or fullness when you eat?  Do you have limitations since surgery?  If you do your surgery is not failing you.  If you find yourself making poor food choices then simply don't keep those trigger foods in your house.  Your home should be a "safe" place.  Make a list of things to do in between meals and snacks to keep your mind off of food.  This first year or two after surgery is a time to learn new eating behaviors.  If you feel like your surgery is failing then ask for an endoscopy and a GI series to diagnose the reason for the failure.  They can tell you if the surgery is failing you or you are failing the surgery.  Deciding what to do after the diagnosis then will be easier.  A dietitian or therapist can help if the surgery is working correctly.  If your surgery is failing mechanically then you can ask your surgeon to fix it.  I know of people that have had their surgery repaired shortly after surgery by an experienced bariatric surgeon and they did wonderfully after that.  I knew my surgery didn't work 2 days after surgery when I ate food in the hospital while others could barely swallow liquids.  I had a 2 cm stoma diagnosed by Dr. Prewitt shortly after surgery and he told me that was fine.  (I assure you that was not fine!)  I have tried to make it work for over 6 years and it is very difficult to live this way.  I wish you the best success.  Tri

Mayberry

It is true that keeping off 90 lbs. is wonderful!

Is your surgery failing now?  My RNY failed me because it was not restrictive.  The pouch has always been too big and the stoma was too big (Dr. Prewitt started using a smaller stoma maker after my surgery) and the bypass has always been very short.  I can diet weight off by eating low calorie food frequently but I don't dump from fat or sugar.  I am constantly hungry and never feel like I have eaten anything. 

If you still feel restriction and your surgery is working why not just get your "trigger foods" out of your house and get back to basics?  If the surgery is really failing you could look into a revision. 

Best of luck working through this.

Tri

so I guess there are structural failures and behavioral failures. I see that. I was only thinking behaviorally. 

I had my surgery In 2003, it is now 2012 and gained 53 pounds, I too lost control somewhere. I'm back on this site and hoping to get a little support.

Thank-you for listening. Anyone know a site for good recipes?

I am 6 years and two months out.  Just 2 years ago this month, I felt wonderful. I was within just 10 pounds of goal weight.  Then I turned 50. In the last two years I have gained 40 pounds.  The sad thing about this as I did not really notice the first 20.  The next 20 came on within a few months.  I am now at 189.  My legs have never looked worse.  I am very upset with myself.  I am considering seeing my surgeon to see if there is anything I can do.  I still dump if I eat the wrong foods.  I also still cannot eat very much.  I love healthy foods.  However, I have started drinking a lot of wine.  I blame this for a lot of my problems.  But, with all the changes the last two years have brought in my life, this too slowly became a habit.  I do not know why alcohol does not cause me to dump, but it does not at all.  I would love some help from anyone that has found themselves in my position.  I am not sure what to do, I just know that I cannot gain anymore weight.  I work a 3 to midnight shift and find it difficult to get into a good routine.  Does anyone have any helpful input on this?  I need something, just don't know what it is.

I hope you don't take this wrong but have you considered maybe it's hormonal? I know lots of people start to gain quiet a bit around this age due to menopause and hormones due to all of that. Just an idea. Maybe you could have them checked and if need be, I hear those bio identical hormones might help. I have no idea for you personally, just a thought.

 

Good luck with your journey. And for what it's worth, I think you have done wonderfully so far!

I too think hormonal changes may be at work.

Also, exercise is not always made to seem as important as it is. Building muscle is an important part of maintenance. A muscular body at rest burns more calories than a more fatty one.

and then, considering what it took for most of us to gain the weight we did before surgery, there is usually an addiction/obsession at play. After surgery we will find something/someone else to take the place of food! I know your pain on a daily basis!

B