Hi, almost 6 years out...really need to get back on track!

I had RNY sept. 06.   I originally lost 148 pounds...felt great!!  Kept it off for a long time...but gradually started making bad food choices, grazing, carbs...etc.
I am now 45 pounds up and feel awful.  Can't seem to get re-motivated.  So frustrated, angry at myself.
To make matters worse, and you would think it would be the right motivation for me, but isn't.  I am now on high blood pressure meds again, sleep apnea has returned and my asthma has worsened.
I also have MS and my walking is getting significantly worse,  I really have trouble standing as well.  I know a wheel chair is in my future, but if I were to lose weight, I would be so much better off physically.I was exercising regularly before, but now due to ms/weight gain I have trouble.  I joined a gym where I can do swim aerobics, was doing 4 x per week. I stopped...and need to get moving. Bad. I can only walk about 30 feet now, with a large limp. Mostly due to MS, but I know I would be better with some weight off. My neurologist is frustrated and I feel that I am a disappointment to her and me.
I am 44 and truly feel 94.  I must must do this for myself and family.
My 4 kids are suffering as well, by seeing their mom like this.  Bad enough with MS, but now my weight is really taking a toll on me again.
When I had the surgery, I was 333 pounds, went down to 195, now back up to 240.
Any words of wisDom?  Thx, Michelle

 

Hi Michelle,
OMG, I am reading this thinking, she got into my head!!!! First, my name is Michaele, also, pronounced your way but spelled differently.
I am in the same boat.  Had lb done in Sept 08.  Was 223, lost 43, was doing great! Than my health started getting worse.  I have muscular dystrophy, and have now gained everything back, on top of getting high blood pressure which i Never had before and my diabetes is back.
I am 39, just adopted 3 kids.  I literally do nothing but sit all day in my chair and watch tv and eat.  I just can't get motivated.  Maybe we can help each other!

 Yep, it sure is tough.  I can't figure out why we (I), sabotage myself!! It's such a awful cycle, that I really think has such a huge mental component.  How old are your kiddos?  Did you adopt all 3 kids at the same time?  Sure takes lots of energy raising kids, which I don't have right now. :(. Today , so far, I have done well with eating.  Can't decide whether to count calories or protein.  Not sure which is the best way.  Although what I need to do, is stop grazing and eat 3 meals a day.  Whew...nice to meet you!

This is long - but I hope that may help you...
Hi.  I feel for you.  I am 4 years post op. I lost 110 lbs, gained back 20... 10 I do not mind but the 10 - I could lose... (don't really have too... but)
For me not to gain any more I need to be on a very mindful (strict) diet. Due to reactive hypoglycemia I had to eliminate most carbs from my diet - the starchy carbs, the sugary carbs. I now follow a "modified" Atkins diet - protein first, some non starchy veggies and ... seldom some fruits. I probably eat no more than 1 serving of fruits a day, and I learn not to eat any fruits on empty pouch - or first thing in the morning. 
I don't eat grains.  they do not agree with me - so for me it is no bread, pasta, rice, or any food like that.  I feel better - and do not get a hungry if I keep that foods away from me.  I do eat a lot - but it is mostly proteins and veggies, I bake very low carbs protein muffins or even cookies... (recipes on line on eggface profile, and other places) I do use flax meal in my baking to increase fiber in my cooking.
I eat 6-7 times a day. I could not function on 3 meals a day. For one - I could never get enough proteins - and I do not go more than 3 hrs between meals (unless I am sleeping - but  always eat just before bed - either some nuts or cheese - just enough to keep my Blood sugar steady during the night)

I do count mostly proteins ... but i also make sure I do not get too many calories... Eating the way I do - I probably eat 1200-1400 per day more or less.  At that level I am not losing or gaining - with some moderate exercise - too vigorous exercise may cause low blood sugar and I do  hate that.

We have here "back on track together group" when some of us come and log our food and exercise daily.   That may give you an idea what some people eat and how much while they are losing weight. We also share recipes and support and encourage each other.  

I do believe that good blood test results are very important to be able to lose weight. When last time you had a complete blood work done?  It took me last 2 years  to get blood work results where I want them to be. It is daily work to make sure I get enough but not too much vitamins and minerals to keep my levels at optimum (the barely "normal" levels almost killed me - just normal - is not good enough for me I need some numbers to be in high range or in a middle for be to feel OK)
Starting with a very detailed lab work - may be the beginning, while you adjusting the diet. Gong back to your original doc and nut - may be also an option - sometimes they have good idea, can offer great support that may allow you to get back on track. 

As well, if you are on Facebook try the group bariatric long-timers.  

I feel you and I am on the same journey. I have had 2 surgeries initially I had the Vertical Banded Gastroplasty and because my stomach never healed they went back and did the Gastric Bypass at my heaviest I weighed about 360 and at my smallest I hit 205 I remember that day because I felt so happy. Now its 2012 and I weigh 278 lbs I gained most of that in the last 5 years since my adult daughter moved back and I stopped eating healthy. Now I am facing that I have to have reflux surgery and a hiatal hernia removed because its caused my reflux to be unmanageable by medication. The surgeon said lose 60lbs or no surgery you will remain sick. I have currently lost 10lbs but I am having a hard time staying on track. I talked with a colleague yesterday and today that said break down the amount you need to lose into small increments like 4 or 5 lbs every few weeks. Track everything you eat and give yourself room to mess up. He also said move often until you work up the stamina to workout at least 4 times a week but not at the same time of the day to trick your body not to get comfortable. I started these things yesterday and so far so good. I have stayed on track. Maybe this will help you too. I have no choice but to succeed because the other option is staying sick with stomach problems. Good Luck

 POOR DIET DAILY RESULTS IN PRRO HEALTH. Did you know that your weight gain could be not the cause of your problems but the symtom. What you put in is what you get out! If you are not meeting your basic bodies NEEDS of super nutriant foods then your body will tell you so. thus weight gain, increased pains and other problems being IRRITATED BY YOUR POOR HEALTH as a result of WHAT YOUR PUTTING IN IT. Lets talk.