Scared of surgery

Hi all.  My mom had RY and has lost 220lbs. in 1year.  But in the process she had 3 obstructions/dilation, 3 ulcers, many many bouts of throwing up after eating (during obstruction), hair loss, muscle mass loss, and she just doesn't look healthy.  My sister is in her 4th month and has lost 60 lbs.  She became lactose intolerant, but so far her biggest problem is slowing down the weight loss since she only had 60 lbs to loose.  She also has a gaunt look about her.  I thinks it's muscle loss too.  I need to loose 100+ lbs to have back surgery.  I have a broken vertebrae and they need to go in through the front.  In the mean time I am on pain medicine that makes me gain weight.  I've tried to diet, but have only maintained due to the meds.  I have a 2o year old daughter who needs to loos about 40 lbs, but I don't want her to think the only way to loose weight is through surgery.  I don't want to be sick form surgery.  I keep thinking about the book "thinner".  I see most people have the opposite problem of regaining, but in my family it's not stopping.  Please....any advice?

I know it may seems scary but you have to make the best decision you have to for yourself. You have to weight the pros and the cons and see what lies ahead for you. I too was dead set against the RNY and got the band. Lost some but some but gained back as well. Did my research and am going RNY hopefully into the new year. I am just holding on to my faith in God and am just confident that this must work. There are a lot of people that have had various experiences with the RNY good and bad. But remember you are your own person. Try not to compare what you feel your experience will be to someone elses experience.

All the best in whatever you choose.

I think the first thing you need to do is research the Big Four forms of WLS---Band, Sleeve, RNY/gastric bypass, and DS(duodenal switch). Sounds like your mom had the RNY/gastric bypass, with those dilations.

The Band and the Sleeve are restriction-only procedures. The RNY is a highly-restrictive, mildly-malabsorptive procedure, and the DS is a mildly-restrictive, highly-malabsorptive procedure. Each works in a different way, have different post-op lifestyles, and give different results. You need to understand them ALL, in order to know which, if any, is right for YOU.

You also need to take a very honest look at yourself and why you got fat. You also need to look at how you eat now, what sort of success you've had with dieting, and what you can and can't change PERMANENTLY. For most of us, the reason diets never worked in the long run was because we couldn't stay on them forever. The same thign is true after WLS---we do have to stay on whatever eating plan our particular surgery calls for FOREVER, or face the very real risk of regain.

I chose the DS, because all it asks me to do is eat 100-120 grams of protein a day---protein first, then anything else I want and have room for. (I do limit my sugar intake, but doing so is SOOOOO much easier now than it was pre-op.) It also asks me to take my vitamins and supplements faithfully EVERY DAY, and to have regular bloodwork done to make sure I'm getting what I need. I find following these three rules so much easier than following any 'diet' I was ever on, and I'm certain I can do this FOREVER. I've done it for six years now, and couldn't be happier with the results!

 Good info Ms Batt!

Hello LTewell,

I can understand what you are going thru, but I totally agree with what MsBatt and Dvanhandel have said. You have to decide for yourself what is best for you. I think by deciding for WLS, you have taken the best decision for your life. You can educate your daughter by telling her the pain you go thru because of your weight. Help her in achieving her goal. Walk her thru each baby step needed in achieving the goal of weight loss. Family support is really important.  Good Luck !!