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Daisy,
I wish I could give you a great big hug!  We have all been in your shoes with failing over the years.  Was there a medical reason why your surgery didn't work from Day 2?  My heart is bleeding for you; please please don't be so hard on yourself.  I had an RNY (lap) in 2004 and lost approx 85 lbs; I never met my goal weight, but went from 265 lbs to 179/180...from size 22/24 to 12/14.  I go up/down 7-10 lbs.  It's not easy.  I fight the demons every day.  I have accepted that there is some weight gain, but I WON'T accept myself as a failure.

Please let me know if I can help you in any way at all.
JA

I am confused how is this a RNY? I just don't see how your doctor thought you would have the same results as others when your sugery was very different from what it usually is. Your pouch was double, and if what I am reading here is right you had a short by pass with no malabsorption. How do you have no malabsorption? How short was your bypass? It is my understanding that if there is a bypss by definition you will have malabsorption. I think that what you had sound like a band but without the plastic, from what I have read the band is dependant on your compliance as well as the RNY. This doesn't make any sense to to me, if we could comply with restricted diets then we wouldn't need WLS. I understand depression and what it does to you, believe me. I have not had WLS yet and have spent the last two months 8 hours a day on the net checking, researching, bloging, going to support groups to get the info I need to make the decision of which WLS I will go for, the result of all of this is the DS. The reason I came to this decision is I read all stuff people wrote when thier WLS failed. I wanted to know what I was up against. I watched you Utubes of failed everything, and I just realized I haven't read anything on a failed DS.(except having to eat more to maintain weight) It seems that when all else fails people say get the DS. That is why I think people tell you to get the DS. Have you asked youself why people resort to the DS when everything else fails? It was your comment about "and don't tell me to get the DS" that made me realize that the DS is the answer to failure that everyone gives. WOW now I know for sure that the DS is what I am getting. Thanks for sharing with us, even when you are looking for help you can still help someone else. Keep reading post maybe you will find what  you need to get you through, I hope you do. I wish you luck and good health. 

P.S. My husband feels I should tell you my initial reaction to you post. I what I told him was that you sounded like a Cancer patient who has just giving up and decided to except your lot. He feels it might help see it in another way.

This sounds like it is your doctors fault to me. I don't think you should feel like a failure.

Hi Daisy,

You have put yourself in a position, I feel, where you are not willing to accept any encouragement or advice.  I wish you well and hope you find solice and peace somewhere.  If you want to deal with the issues and work on them with someone, please do so.  I am a good listener too. Huuugzzzz

Hi Daisy,

I had the vertical sleeve July 2007. Within two months  I lost 42 lbs then it DEAD Stopped!!!!!!!
By that December I was struggling with 6-8 lbs lost & gained over the next months, then it got out of control. I am now almost to where I was July 2007 just shy 18lbs. I am totally disgusted and I have done everything to loose the weight. I was also told to have the DS. Like you, I am done with surgery and I feel I am destined to be FAT!!!!!!!

I do get depressed over this issue but I try to remain cheerful on the outside. Since alot of people know I had the surgery, I feel like a double failure.

People on this board say to deal with the real issues, and they are WHAT???????? BEING FAT is the real issue and it is depressing!

Good luck to you Daisy, I do feel your pain.

Elaine