I don't think the surgety failed I think I failed...

I think 2007 is the year I let myself spiral out of control knowingly. I've had a lot of personal hits to my financial problems and self esteem and I let it snowball me. I also took to cooking/baking again for the first time in years. A lot of things have gone wrong and a lot of things I have let gone wrong in my life and then let myself stew and wallow in the misery. I had a Doctor's appointment yesterday with a SSI Doctor and went into shock seeing I had gained 27 lbs. I knew it was gonna be bad because simply I have had to almost surgically seal myself to get into my jeans. I was in a size 18 victory jeans and then moved into a size 20 jeans and now I'm busting outta those.   I have been grazing like a mad cow disease in the kitchen. I have been drinking with meals. I have been living off of carbs and crap. I have not been doing my water intake. I have no****ched or put my protein first. I have not been exercising. I have not been logging in my WLS journal. I have not seen my WLS Doctor. I have not been good with my vitamins.   I am starting over today. I am not going into a size 22 jeans. I am not gonna ignore my eating anymore. I am not going to drink with my meals. I am not going to slide on my vitamin intake and wonder why I'm in another hair loss phase. I am going to do protein first. I am going to get back into my new pair of size 18 jeans in my closet. I am not going to let myself throw away all of my successes. I am going to take control of my life my eating and my actions. 

I don't know if you either wanted or expected comment but here I go.  I know where you are.  I have been waiting not only for 2007 to end but this decade, lol.  I can't speak for everyone because there are some really diligent people on OH, people who I can't believe ever let themselves become overweight, alas I am not one of them.  What I am and I suspect, you are is a woman (person) who deals with problems with diversion and our favorite diversion is the comfort food.   I have also recently gained weight and am trying to recall how I lived before (because it has been just that long for me).  I applaud your new found dedication and wish you all the success and victory this universe has to give you.  I pray that your problems dimenish and become manageable and faceable and if you need someone to bounce things off then I offer my ear.  I can not give you a sucess story of my own as I am in the same boat; but I can offer support and cheering (just as long as you don't make me put on one of those short-short skirts....my thighs aren't all that attractive, lol) Keep your head up,  Shay

I can so totally relate to what you are saying.  I have been hit with things as well,  and unfortunately i gained more than you ahve which i am not proud of.  It started in september of '05 when my mom passed away.  She was by far,  my biggest supporter of my surgery and when she passes,  i felt like i lost my support.  From that time,  i had been to 4 other funeral,  2 of which,  were for family members.....needless to say,  the stress has really hit me and i have been doing the wrong things when it came to eating.  Like you,  i was......and still guilty of.....drinking with meals.  For the last month,  i have started to regain what i have worked so hard for.  I still haven't seen any results,  but i am not going to give up.  It has been a long time since i have seen my doctor as well....mainly because i am embarrassed at the weight that i have put on.  I am glad that you are going to take control of things......like the expression says,  there's not time like the present.  Feel free to email me and we could kick each others a$$ and get back on track.  take care and best of luck to you! -Joe-

Hey ya! Ok I'll add you as a friend :) I came across a quoe the other day I liked that said "Hate something, change something." and I put it on a post it note on my fridge. I too feel guilt and don't want my Doctor to see my failings but then he's the only person who might be able to help me with these things so I should face the msic and go see him.  I'd love to have a weight loss friend to help me kick my own ass back on track. :)

Hi , i  was  reading  your  post  this  morning  i  am  going  through  the  same  thing  right  now  i  drink  with  my  meals  everything  i  eat  gets  stuck  but  junk  food  goes  down  just  fine  so  i  stuck  to  that  i  had  given  up  sodas  but  i  am  again  addicted i  had  i  got  my  band  6/11/07  i  went  from  250  to  211  in  about  3 1/2  months  but  i  gained  5  pounds  already  i'm  up  216  i'm  weak  i  love  my  sweets  and  sodas everyday  i  say  ,ok  today's  the  day  i'm  getting  back  on  track  well  it's  been  amonth  and  i  still  can't..did  i  fail?  sounds  like  you  have  more  will power  than  i  do , good  luck   Debbie

Hi,

I think I have been out of control for a year or so, and would also like to get back on track, lose what I have gained, become healthy and fit again.  Let's all motivate each other!

Kim

Hi Everyone

 I am new to this board and have been staying behind the scenes and just reading.  I do not think I am at the point of saying that my surgery has failed.  As of today I have gained a total of 5 lbs but DO NOT AN WILL NOT gain anymore.  I am hoping that a good contributor of the 5 lbs is the Chinese food I had last night,  My problem is I have gotten away from the basics.  I am not drinking all my water and have discovered that I can sneak down sweets without dumping.  I came here for help to become refocused with my life long committment.  I cannot afford to buy new clothes since I gave away ALL my larger sizes and only have the size L/XL tops and size 10 pants that I wear now.  I still feel good about myself but would like to lose the last 15 pounds to bring me down to 150.  I am hoping that the lipo procedure I am scheduled for on December 21 will help curb my appetite to get a jump on my weightloss.   I have an appointment at the end of December with my WL Dr so I need to start now,  I am planning on starting on the Time Out plan since others I know that have been on it have lost about 15 lbs.  Anyway, I am glad I found this forum because I know i will get the TLC and support I need to not fail and to stay focused!

Hugs

 

Hi everybody! I was Banded on 08/06/07...and I've gained about 15-20 pounds since then. I lost too, but quickly gained back. I have no restriction, but they expect me to "diet" tillI can get to that point. I wouldn't have HAD the surgery had I been able to diet.  I am afraid as hell of my surgeon and his staff, because I am not a team player. This is why... I have several mental illnesses, including BiPolar.....and there's no reason or rhyme to anything I do. I'm on a lot of meds. And my ONLY support system, my husband, has taken to the bottle quite heavily. And our 15 year marriage SUCKS, and the pain makes me EAT! I have other ways to "cope", but they're not healthy. As a result of growing up, f*ed up, I never learned how to take care of my self. Mike kept me alive for 18 years.  Basically, I am not only emotional eating, but psychiatrically eating. It's 21/2 hours into 2008 and I am considering admitting myself to our local psych ward, where my Surgeon happens to have his office. I don't have the mental resources I had a year ago when my "support system" was looked into. I have no family, no friends (except my husband's, who I LOVE dearly)  HOW DO YOU COPE WITH MENTAL ILLNESS WHEN YOUR OLD ESCAPE WAS FOOD, AND YOU JUST HAD LAPBAND SURGERY? I gained, I'm seeing Doc on Thursday, I'll get yelled at again (2nd time) and I'm scared as hell. I try harder than most of you to even stay alive (NOTHING personal), yet I can't conquer this?  So few WLS patients bring up psychiatric issues, I so wish people would get off the psychiatric sofa.

Hi there, I lost 120lbs and am almost 3 yrs out. I have a 7mo old baby boy. My whole pregnancy was wonderful, I was one of those "wow I cant' even tell your pregnant people." The ones I totaly didn't relate to whith my other two boys!  My lowest was 158lbs (size 8ish) I setteled in at a size 10 and 164 for about a year.  Then when I had the baby, I guess I just looked so good and gained so slow that I gave myself premission to graze and eat more and more carbs.  Because they are easy to go down, and the east stress.  Now I am between 183-190 (yikes) depending on the day.  That was hard to write for me.  This whole 'failing' attitude and frankly my 'failing' actions wreak HAVOK on my self esteme. I look in the mirror, and you know you lose weight but a lot of times your profile is the same, just smaller. (especially when you have had three huge baby boys)  So I think I am still 288, I feel like I see the same person who is a size 22-24.  The MAIN thing I hated about diets is the obesession over food, calories, and all that.  Like you almost think about food more, but I guess we ALL have to face that demon, at some point....become comfortable and accepting of the fact that we will allways be sugar/food adicts.  And we have to live our lives as such.  Here's to another day, another day winning.  And by winning we will lose (lbs.)  Lets all support eachother. I KNOW I NEED IT! Thanks for the Posts, Jennifer 

Hey everyone!  I am going to be 6 years out in June with the RNY, and I have gained about 13 lbs back in the last two years.  I have really started to get down on myself and try to think of ways this has failed me!  Then to top it off, I went to see my Dr and she told me that I HAD to lose 5 lbs before she saw me again, cause with a RNY it wasn't like I could just go get a fill.  I was crushed.  Then I thought about it, why? I am down 150 lbs (well, 137 now) and I am still healthy and happy.  I am just trying to get back to the "old ways" no drinking with meals, no sweets, etc.  I know I can do this.   Then after talking with some people, I was told that the 13 lbs I have put on is what my Dr considers the "bounce back" weight that supposedly all Gastric Bypass patients get.  So, I am NORMAL and I can do this.  I have my tool for life! Hugs!