All I want is food...

Thanks this has helped me as I have been feeling very depressed lately due to my inability to control my eating. I have fought with myself gotten mad at myself and cried. I really think my mind is out to kill me or something, it just always seems hungry when they body isnt. 

Thee probably isn't one person on this board that doesn't understand exactly how you feel.  Obesity is still a very misunderstood disease even by the professionals.  We also have the added depression of having our "issues" on stage for the world to see due to our body weight.  Just be glad that you found your way here and to a surgery that gives you the best possible chance for a normal life.  There are lots and lots of people still suffering alone and not realizing there is help. 

I'd like to recommend 2 things to you that were invaluable to me as a pre-op in the decision making time period

Rethinking Thin
http://www.amazon.com/Rethinking-Thin-Science-Loss-Realities /dp/0374103984

and

Fat: What No One is Telling You
You can watch this online.  It is surprisingly pro-surgery.  I think Chapter 7 is about surgery. 

http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/takeonestep/fat/index.html

These 2 things were my deciding factor in realizing that I was never going to beat this disease of the body/mind on my own and that surgery was the only answer for me. 

Jason, 

Ican totally relate about my mind.  I am convinced this in all in my head. 

My food funeral has lasted like three weeks. Like you said I can't stop thinking about what I won't be able to eat for a year or more. I just got to keep the eye on the prize!

Shawn

Easy to obsess when you know it might be a while before you can have those things again.
Try and rein it in a little - maybe pick a couple of nights for "so long" meals.

The mind games didn't go away for me post-op but they became much easier to deal with and identify.
Also, you have so many other things to consider post-op, you can obsess over hydration, protein, and
eventually vitamins.