One week out-- buyer's remorse?

AC - how old are you, if you don't mind me asking?     When you are younger, the effects of morbid obesity are not as pronounced as they are as one ages.     You might only have PCOS and arthritis now...but then the high blood pressure, diabetes and cardiac issues set in.   Circulatory problems caused by the diabetes lead to wound issues and possible amputations.   The arthritis leads to complete lack of mobility.   I have seen first-hand how negatively obesity  has affected my parents.    I had my DS at age 45 (six and a half  years ago) in order to circumvent these issues.  I feel like a twenty five year old.     Do you mind disclosing what kind of problems you now have as a result of your DS that you did not have as a pre-op?   Sometimes the first year, it seems like you are destined to carry your DS around like a ball and chain for the rest of your life.     Now, 6.5 years later, it's just part of who I am, and the quality of my life is far, far higher than it was pre-op.   Yes, I DO have to be vigilant, and I have had some calcium and D issues crop up, but I have NOWHERE near the problems I would have had if I had remained at 282 pounds.    

Hi Julie,

I was 49.  I have a long story (I will try to make it short).  I had lost weight in the early 90's w/a personal trainer and a lifestyle change and exercise...maintained until 2006 when I had an accident with broken bones etc.  The weight came back on over the next year and a half.  In 2010, broke up a long term relationship which was extremely hard on me.  Moved 1200 miles away (where I am now), I lived here right after I graduated from college.  It was a bad choice to leave what was my home.  Friends and family thought I would be better off close by - due to the difficult break up.   I had not had health insurance in quite awhile.  I then got a job w/health insurance..  The benefits were great for a WLS.  I was going to do the sleeve.  My BFF and her hubby did it 4 yrs ago, they have had great success, maintained their weight loss etc.  The caveat was... my insurance would only pay for one procedure in a lifetime.  At this point of my life, failure is not an option with weight loss.  I knew whatever I did, it had to work.  I was heavily persuaded by the surgeon in the consult that I needed to have this.  The other surgeon did not do this surgery and wanted to do the sleeve.  So, I thought the surgeon knew what he was doing in telling me and I quote "You must have this surgery".   I didn't think of it as the easy way out, I thought it would help me maintain the rest of my life though.

Now, I have low blood sugar issues.  I have to carry around Nut Thins and peanut butter.  I eat a bite of something at minimum every hour to try to counteract it.  When it first started, I had the shakes so bad while I was driving, I pulled over. I wasn't sure what was happening.  My blood sugar hovers under 50.  Doesn't matter what I eat. 

Now, I am having heart issues (which never had before).  My resting heart rate has been between 60-70. Now, it's 43, 46.  In a 5 day monitoring period, it never got about 52.  I am still waiting on test results from the 24 hr heart monitor last week.  If it doesn't come up, they are going to have to put in a pacemaker.

I had great labs before surgery.  I've never had high cholesterol, triglycerides or blood pressure.  Now, my blood pressure is too low.

The financial cost associated with this surgery is ridiculous!  The surgeon's office was like, Vits will cost $50/mo etc.  Yeah right!  I wished I would have done what I did before and had a personal trainer for 6 days a week.  It would have been cheaper than what this has cost me in 5.5 mo.

I can't enjoy going out to dinner with friends because my stomach talks over the whole conversation.  The person who used to be the life of the party is now quiet as a mouse.  I don't enjoy any food!!!  I eat only because I know I have to.  I always get in 110 grams of protein a day between shakes & food. 

I have been in bed sick with a cold thing since Friday.  What used to work (Rx cough syrup & Black Elderberry syrup) doesn't work anymore because of the malabsorption.  So, I would be over this in 24 hrs in years past, I've been in bed this whole time.

My labs aren't too bad.  I'm awaiting my new ones to see where I'm at.

Bottom line, I"m more miserable living this way than being fat.  I was the energizer bunny before surgery.  My boss used to tell the other ladies I work with,  "I don't know where she get's her energy".  Now, she is says "This surgery has taken it's toll on you, you are not the same person". 

So, in a nutshell.  I am being realistic (no flowery coating here).  This surgery was the worst decision of my life.  I'm not depressed.  I am a realistic in life.

I have 12 cousins.  All but 5 are obese.  We have the gene in our family so to speak.  It's kind of amazing.  Only 1 has diabetes, the rest don't.  No high blood pressure or high cholesterol. 

Here is the bottom line.  I cannot be without health insurance now.  I want to leave here and move back home.  However, I cannot without a job first.  I had a great opportunity for a start up company but they did not offer health insurance right off the bat.  So,  I have put myself in a box.  I realized after last week's heart issues, no matter what - I have to hold onto my health insurance.  Cobra is ridiculous! 

I am a Whole Foods girl... I've been a greenie since the early 90's.  Contrary to what the dietician said, this surgery is not for a greenie!  I have a lot of food allergies, I'm LI & Gluten sensitive.  I could always eat cheese.  Now, cheese makes me sick. 

 

Thank you for your encouragement.  I'm trying to make the best of it!

I am grateful to this board.  I have learned so much!  I am very thankful!  Some wonderful people have helped me along the way.

 

 

 

 

HI AC,

Thanks so much for responding to me.    So you were an older DS'er too, eh?    I'm sorry you've gone through so much.   Some of the issues you are experiencing are very common in the first year or so of our DS's, and you might notice that these things diminish as you are further out.   You are still a DS baby!   That rapid weight loss can be rough on our bodies.   I remember reading some posts from people saying that they felt like the energizer bunny after their DS's, and I thought, "Did I miss out on something?"  That first year, I was tired a great deal.   Now, I am that energizer bunny they talk about.    The other day, my husband, who is a chef, and I were preparing for a holiday open house that we were holding.    He was about to drop dead by 4 p.m., and I was still up and at 'em.  He said, "Girl, I do this for a living and you can work circles around me!"

My heart rate and blood pressure are low.   My heart rate is almost always in the 50's (the doctor always says "you must be a marathon runner) and my BP is about 85-90 over 45-50.   I consistently set the alarms off.    A lot of us as post-ops have this drop.   I cannot predict how this will turn out for you - I wish I could.   I feel that for many of us, our attitudes determine that too.      I would like to hear how you're doing six months from now....a year from now.....to see if you are doing better.   

My sister, after seeing my DS success, decided to have one.   She had a different surgeon than me, had it opened, and had a leak that took almost a year to heal.  She was on a feeding tube, NPO, almost that entire time.  She developed three hernias.  She has had five or so surgeries post-DS.   During this time, she said to me, "How could you have ever let me do this to myself?   I wish I would have never had the DS, I've ruined my life!"   She will be four years out in May and is happy, healthy and thrilled with her DS.       I hope you eventually feel that way too.     Good luck to you, and please keep in touch if you have any questions or need to vent.

 

Yep... I"m at that half century mark.. LOL!

THANK YOU!  For the words of encouragement!  I feel so bad for your sister!   I'm glad she's ok now.  I too hope that in 6 months things will change.  I hope I will feel different.  I am trying to make the best of it all!    I look at each day as a new day.  I don't know when I will get over that internal feeling "this is the absolute worst decision in my life".  Maybe over time, it will go away.  Once again, thank you for the encouraging words.

 

I felt that way during the first two weeks...trying to force myself to drink drink drink.  I finally just quit stressing about it. Drink as much as was comfortable.  I even quit measuring for a week.  It seemed like that made all the difference for me. I'm only about a month out now and have started trying to keep track of the fluids, but still am not tracking all my protein yet.  I will, but it was just all too much at first. So, take some time to recover, and relax!  This will get better, and honestly I can say I have RARELY heard people say they regret it after a year! :)

Hi Kelly,

I felt exactly the same as you the first month out from D.S. surgery. No one could, or did convey the miserable feelings that came post surgery  about losing the desire to eat, or the tiny amount of food that filled my healing swollen stomach, or the metallic taste of all food and drinks. I had regrets too. I found a pre made shake  at Sams- 30g protein I could tolerate, drinking 3 a day worked, along with warm protein broth, and hot  SF sweet tea. I never made it to the water totals, and still dont, but make up for it with as many shakes as I can, sipping all day, and late into the evening. I tried all kinds of food, gave up trying  most solids for the next 6 months, until my taste buds returned to normal. The only way I can get in all the protein I need every day now is to supplement food with 3 double protein shakes a day. I don't worry or think how to get lots of protein from food, just enjoy what I can. 

Post surgery depression is a given with major surgery, and anesthesia recovery. A lot of us find a therapist to talk to who has  experience with weight loss patients. My Surgeons office has behaviorists to meet with privately, or lectures to attend, which both helped me immensely, for the first 6 months. Some of us turn to antidepressants to weather the mental storms that seem to pop up out of nowhere. Exercise does help, more as you lose weight. Fast walking does wonders for creating positive endorphins to off set stormy moods. 

I'm very happy to have the D.S. because of its ability to help me stay at my goal weight for the past 8 months. I no longer have excruciating knee and hip pain walking to the mail box. I walk miles at the gym, and have a trainer for weight strengthening. I will say the D.S. journey is not easy. It takes a lot of proactive work, not just losing all your excess weight, but finding a clear path to good health, which is different for all of us. The cost of my  absolutely necessary vitamins are about $50.00 a month. I have a few  prescriptions, and supplements, which all are not absolutely necessary. My Internist monitors my to labs determine the amount of necessary vitamins. 

Recovering from whole body plastics for the past 3 weeks, with 7 hrs deep anesthesia is no fun either. I am coming out of it finally, having a few hours a day feeling almost normal, taking Advil days, and heavier pain meds at night. My goal was always to have plastics, not just reach my goal weight. I look back on my D.S. journey as an enabling experience leading to the shape I always dreamed of  aspiring to as a kid with out of control weight issues. Where do you see your self 5-10 years down the line? I need to be healthy to help my kids with their children, and help my husband should he need me. I'm doing it all for my whole family, not just me.

So, sip, sip, sip,walk, walk, walk. We all did it, and came out the other end with smiles, a reflection of the new inner strength we earned by taking charge of our weight issues. If we can do it, you can too. ;-)

Sandra, thank you so much for your thoughtful reply. It relieves me to know that all of this is just a part of the process! I will definitely look into the counseling and groups at Dr. Kemmeter's office and use that as another tool. That was a good suggestion. You are right also about focusing on why I did this--- to be there for my kids and future grandkids, travel with my very active husband and just be healthy and "normal" once again. I see you are in Kzoo-- my son attends K College ( he is currently abroad in Madrid). I hope your recovery from plastics goes very well-- I have heard they can be a long and hard recovery-- but well worth it!!! Best of luck-- and thanks again.
Kelly

Thank you all for sharing.  I am totally scared out of my mind now because I never imagined that I could have these types of thoughts post surgery.

I have just completed all my doctor appts and am awaiting approval from my insurer.  I too am planning on having the DS because it seemed the best surgery for being able to eat a somewhat normal way.  I currently work with somone in my department who has had the Gastric Bypass I think maybe two years ago and they are constantly throwing up.  I hate to say this but I'm going to be honest.  I was thinking that " Thank God I'm going to have the DS b/c I don't want to have to deal with those issues of food getting stuck, etc."

But after reading this entire post and responses and replies and am scared to death!  I had knee surgery back in August 2012 and originally was going to go for the Sleeve.  But my recovery has been real slow and I donk know if I will be able to do impact exercising so I decided that the DS would be the best thing.  I know a few people who have had the Sleever and they are experincing success but they all exercise so I thought that for long term maybe the Sleeve would not work for me so again, I settled in for the DS.

Now I am baffled because I don't know what to do!  Once my insurance approves (and I believe it will) I will meet with the surgeon and I guess talk all this out with him.  Thanks everyone for their feedback because I guess I need to consider ALL that can happen post surgery.  I was focusing on a great recovery but I guess I have to prepare for what could happen as well.