Pregnancy post-op HELP

I TOTALLY AGREE!!!    If he can't put You first now when you need him most....having a baby with him would be a Very bad idea.

Preach, it, NC!

Yikes yikes! NO NO! For all the above reasons.

You may not believe in marriage, I don't know but if you do, why wouldn't he be proposing and planning a wedding so that you will have a real complete & committed family.  Be strong, Know that you are enough for him to stay no matter what.  I remember you posting something about your boyfriend having concerns about how soon you can have intercourse after surgery.  He seems like a gem hun!  Be your own person, set your own standards.  We are born alone and we will die alone.  Not saying that we shouldn't have wonderful relationships in between but someone you value and hold that close to your heart  should have your back and look out for your best interest.  He is being selfish love.

All Best,

Zee

I was just thinking the same thing Zee was and I saw her post.

Have him make an honest woman out of you first before children.  Call me old fashioned - its who I am... but I'm one of the first to have a child well within wedlock in my family

I totally agree.  I may be in my 20s, but I'm very old fashioned when it comes to being married before having children!  Unfortunately there are many my age in my family who don't agree and continue to pop out baby after baby, and of course they get WIC/Foodstamps/Medicaide/etc.  Drives me nuts!!!

Beyond that, why would you want to put your own life and the life of that baby at risk??  If that were my man, I'd be telling him where to shove it!  I cannot even imagine my husband trying to push me into something like that.

I got pregnant 11 months post op and had a very easy, healthy, happy  pregnancy. I was tracked by a perinatologist who made sure to follow my labs regularly. He kept thinking I'd have gestational diabetes, preeclamsia or something, but I had none of that. In fact, I felt great right up to the end and my labs were very steady (of course, I made sure to keep up on my vitamins). I actually couldn't believe how much energy I had (at least once the morning sickness passed)! I was so much more active than I would have been if I were my old heavy self and pregnant. I worked right up to the day before I was induced at 39 weeks. My baby girl met all the size milestones every step of the way and I gave birth to her in April 2012 (regular delivery - no c-section needed). She was 7.0 lbs - so quite normal - even though I didn't officially gain any weight overall (besides a few temporary ups and downs - the DS weight loss must have made up for baby weight). By two weeks after delivery I was 20 lbs lower than my previous low. Ha - and now at this very moment I'm actually nine weeks pregnant with... TWINS! Gulp... that'll teach me to brag about having such an easy post-DS pregnancy! One thing, though... toward the very end of my pregnancy my iron dipped a little low (which can happen with normies, too), so the doc had me do a couple of iron transfusions for good measure. It was easy peasy, but I'd recommend watching your iron levels. You don't want to be in labor, have to have a c-section or something, and be going in with low iron. Whether it's a natural or c-section delivery, you'll be losing blood so you need to have good iron levels.

Good luck!

Sometimes you ask a question and the answers you get are too painfully honest.  This is probably one of those times.

So he insists and he is ready for a child.  Is he ready to PAY for a child?  And why would he even consider for one minute putting your health in jeopardy?  You are the woman he is supposed to love above all else.  Well, guess what, it's not all about him.  Personally I would kick his azz to the curb and tell him to find another baby-mama to have and be stuck with raising his kids.

Sorry!  But here's the deal, fat girls settle for less.  Why would you want to be with a 'man' who doesn't care about you?  You deserve better.

Your profile says you are VSG in 2010.  Did you recently revise to the DS?

I loved the responses you got here.  People gave you tough love responses - they care about you and your health.

Listen to what you've read and take it to heart.  I love the response that Fat Girls settle for Less.  We do.  I always have.  I think it's like buying shoes and clothes when you're obese.  You take whatever fits.  It may not be pretty - and it may not match your personality, but if it fits you buy.  We do the same with men, do they treat us well, or do we just settle because we don't want to be alone?

You deserve a man who is going to think of you first and foremost.  The best gift we can give our children is to love their father or mother.  Is this a man who is going to be with you forever?  Sure many Dads don't stay around, but that should always be a consideration before making a baby with someone - we should all have that Pollyanna image of life long lasting love - we deserve our happily ever after.

Don't settle.  Don't get pregnant and have a baby just for a man.  If he loves you - as he should before you have a baby with him, he will wait.  If he decides he can't wait - then let him go.  He wasn't worth it.   Remember any man you have a baby with should be the man you would want your Son to grow up to be like.  If not, move on.