STOP!!! Trying to "Talk Me Out Of Surgery" !!!!

Dreamgenie84003
on 3/17/12 1:00 pm - American fork, UT
I'm looking for a good support system...pretty new to OH, my parents try to be supportive, but don't really know what the surgery is and how to support it.  my mom tried to get the surgeon and staff to explain it to her, like I didn't do a good enough job or something...and as for the spouse, well, after finding out he cheated on my all through our 8 year marraige and is about as supportive as a twig....I'm basically my own support system.  I'm looking to meet people who are going through the same thing I am.  lol.
Blank Out
on 3/18/12 12:47 am
 Sweetie, I hope you get really good at taking care of yourself!  I hope you start by throwing your husband to the curb!  Time to get a better suport system in place.  I pray you find it!  In the meantime, sip, walk, rest!  And, when you are healed in about 8 weeks, be really good at getting in your protein, vitamins, and daily water!    I wish you the very best in your future.  I hope it includes a better group of friends, and a new wonderful husband!
     
HW/ 302  SW/287  CW/140  GW/135

-VolsDiva-
on 3/17/12 11:14 am - Orange County :), TN
I am sure they have good intentions and like others have said they are scared of the unknown. Don't let others opinions get to you. I am sure you have done a lot of homework and are fully aware of what you are getting yourself into. Good luck with your surgery. The DS is the best thing I ever did for my HEALTH!

06/07/12 - Dr. Sauceda LBL, BL/BA, Arm Lift, Fat Transfer and Neck Lift

    
Blank Out
on 3/18/12 12:41 am
 This is why I did not tell anyone, except my husband, daughters, and good friend who watched my girls day of surgery.  People are on a need to know basis.  It's important to guard your boundaries.  This means not telling people all aspects of your life.  It's your life!  You have no need to justify your choices to everyone else!

So, I'm almost two years out, and I will tell you it's the BEST DECISION OF MY LIFE!!!!  I look and feel incredible.  Too bad OH started posting our personal info on Face Book without our permission, otherwise you could see my before and after photos!  I look amazing.  I feel amazing!

Best to you!
     
HW/ 302  SW/287  CW/140  GW/135

newyorkbitch
on 3/18/12 1:23 am
 If you didn't want your FB "friends" to comment,  then why did you post such personal information for all to see?

The best thing you can do now is just ignore what you want to ignore.  What's done is done.

By the way, you can make a "real friends" subgroup of your friends and only post certain things to them.
whatthehair
on 3/18/12 10:59 am - Kalamazoo, MI
I'm thinking you must have taken this the wrong way?? It's not that I don't want people to comment, it's fine! They can say what they want, that doesn't bother me that much. It's the people trying to talk me out of it. I just don't understade why there are people like that lol. Maybe being on this side of the fence I would completely understand why someone would choose WLS, and would just want to be able to cheer them on....I'm very open about talking about it to be honest, which I understand a lot of people are not....
Yes, I will definitely ignore those things I wish to ignore, you're right, what's done is done. I am obviously naive thinking I can talk openly about this and stop people from trying to talk me out of it ....
And.....I didn't know I could do a subgroup of friends, on FB? Thanks for the tip I appreciate it!


P.S. I LOVE your username. LOL! And thanks again for putting me in check 
AundreaSmith
on 3/18/12 1:32 am - Caledonia, MI
DS on 03/12/12
I have told very, VERY few people.  My Husband and children are very supportive.  My Mother on the other hand, tries to be supportive but I feel as if she is disappointed with my decision to have surgery.  She is here in the home to help me with the kids and housework, my little ones are only 9 and soon to be 5, so I need lots of help with meal times, laundry and getting them up and ready for school/preschool.  I told only one of my best friends, for the simple reason that she has has WLS and understands what happens to one both physically and mentally when you make this type of decision.

I have not told a lot of my other friends because I didn't want their opinions or their "disapproval".  I fought for this surgery, I didn't have the support of my family physician, I went over his head and went directly to my insurance provider for information, I requested Dr. Kemmeter, it was all me and no one else.  I took control (for the first time in my life) and haven't stopped since.

The biggest support you need are those closest to you, my Husband has been a solid foundation of support through this ENTIRE journey and it's just begun for us. 

Keep your chin up, do what is best for you and keep your eye on the prize!  The prize for me is to be able to chase my kids around in the back yard and CATCH them!!  There is so much to look forward to, and it sounds like you've made the decisions to put you in the right direction.

I wish you ALL the best!  You have chosen a FANTASTIC surgeon and medical staff!

HW: 404/ SW: 380/  GW: 155

    

Emily F.
on 3/18/12 6:29 am
Well, you apparently learned this lesson very quickly. If you want to vent about ds or wls stuff, do it on a ds page. Keep your personal info, personal with your friends. Leave the wls with wls people. non wls people have zero clue, as you can tell by the Body by Vi people. Yes, bc there are just soooooooooooooo many people that lost 100plus lbs on body by vi and still doing it??? ummmmmmmmmmmmmm. nope, none. They have samples bc they can't do it for years on end.
whatthehair
on 3/18/12 11:11 am - Kalamazoo, MI
 Yes, I figured this would be the best place to vent lol! I am really finding out the non WLS people have NO freaking clue what I'm feeling/thinking/understanding..whatever, but now I know that there will be lots of people who will try to deter me, but I just have to stand tall, and brush their nonsense off my shoulder! LOL thanks for the body by vi laugh, it get really annoying when my inbox is filled with their offers lol!
Julie R.
on 3/18/12 9:44 am - Ludington, MI
 An icy "thank you for your feedback, however I've already made the decision that I feel is best for me," followed by some miserably uncomfortable silence works most of the time.....

Dr. Kemmeter rocks, and you have wisely chosen THE most effective bariatric surgery available at this time.   When you see Dr. K, tell him Julie from Ludington sent you.    I think he must think I walk the length of I-94 advertising his services or something because I ask everyone to do that.   He's a wonderful man and he will ALWAYS be your doctor.      

Good luck!


Julie R - Ludington, Michigan
Duodenal Switch 08/09/06 - Dr. Paul Kemmeter, Grand Rapids, Michigan
HW: 282 - 5'4"
SW: 268
GW: 135
CW: 125

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