Vets I need your help-PLEASE

OK, so my surgery is scheduled for Dec. 5th. I've been on the board pretty consistently since May or so and most of the vets know my story (with fighting Kaiser for the DS and with fighting the DMHC to waive classes, etc.).  Well, here is where I am...

I'm sure most people go through this but I need some serious encouragement.  I'm starting to have doubts about having the DS.  I'm not worried about dying in the surgery, or dying from infection afterwards.  I'm definitely scared of the recovery because I know that statistically, it's longer than with the RNY and with the Sleeve. 

But what's getting to me the most is that I'm having so many stomach problems lately (most likely because I'm nervous about keeping my kids happy and secure while I"m recovering--the in laws are taking care of them btw).  Whenever I get nervous, upset, scared, stressed, etc. I start throwing up or feeling nauseous, or start having diarrhea.  What I'm going through here with my nervous stomach isn't uncommon.  It usually happens to me once a year or two for several months at a time.  I end up losing mass amounts of weight without trying and feel generally pretty sick and tired most of the time.

I'm starting to wonder how on earth I'm going to be able to take my vitamins during the weeks (or months) that I go through this nervous stomach thing every year or two.  If I don't take the vits, then I'll get worse and feel worse.  If I try taking ANYTHING (even my anti-depressants) when I'm nauseous I end up throwing it all up anyway.  Tonight I got VERY sick.  I was doubled over, trying to keep my food down, then laid in bed just waiting for it to pass.  This has gotten me to start considering (last minute) the sleeve instead of the DS.  My surgeon would be fine with the change.  However, I KNOW that with the sleeve that the end result isn't much different than dieting.  I'll lose some weight and then spend the rest of my life trying to keep it off. 

My husband and my dad are worried about how I'll deal with missing vitamins when I'm sick or going through stomach crap and worried that I'll end up getting VERY sick. 

Will some of the vets here PLEASE give me some words to ease my concerns?  I've fought hard for this surgery and I've done EVERYTHING I could to educate myself about the procedure and aftercare.  But I just want to make the right decision for myself--long-term.

Thanks for listening to me ***** and whine.  I won't mind a little ***** slapping if you feel like doing it.

Sher-

Disclaimer:  this is the long back story of why your story brought a giggle to me.  Flashback 40 years ago when my friend got married and broke out in hives before her wedding. I was incredibly envious because when I got nervous, I threw up and did not imagine that would make for lovely wedding memories.  So, yes, I do understand nervous stomach and puking.

Flashback to Oct, 2008:  I had a rough recovery with lots of nausea and vomiting.  I probably didn't even start taking my vitamins until 3 or 4 months after my surgery.  Not that I recommend that, BUT at 3 years later I am doing great.  When I get nervous,  it still goes straight to my stomach. The big difference has been years of counseling to do deal with some root causes of my anxieties and a little living better through chemistry.  With my counseling, I also take Prozac.

This is a big, scary surgery.  Vitmamin deficiencies and malnutrition are very real possiblilities.  They do not have to be come realities.  I do what I need to 98% of the time.  My labs are great and I have my life back.  It can happen for you, too. 

You may want to consider some mental health counseling, too.  You may or may not need anti-depressants or anti-anxiety medicines.  If you do, they could be short term or for the long term.  For me, it's been long term and will be.  That's OK with me.  I could not have even considered getting this surgery without psychotherapy, with or without psych medicines.  I did not have to live with obesity and I did not have to live with my anxiety and all the physical symptomology that came with it.

PS:  My wedding was pretty nice, too.  It was small, just my husband, his kids, two witnesses and the judge.  No throwing up!  LOL!

Thanks so much for the advice and funny story. I have been on prozac for the past 4.5 years and I also take lamictal (mood stabilizer). Since I was a little girl, my mom and dad had me in counseling (I was abused as a child and it was very evident to my family that something was wrong).  I really do love counseling and I think you're right that I should begin again.  I will have to start AFTER surgery since surgery is only 2 weeks away and Kaiser (my ins. plan) won't get me in before that.  Getting started is a fabulous suggestion.  Also, my psychiatrist  just prescribed ativan for anxiety (though I hope it doesn't make me sick too!).  Luckily I have a few Zofran left from my preganancy last year that the doctor said I can take as well.

Again, thanks so much for cheering me up and for giving some great advice.

Sher-

I was writing you this nice, encouraging post when the power went out (Florida...) and I lost the entire post. I am so disgusted right now. Let me try again.

I am certainly no vet but I understand how you feel. I was you not too long ago. Pre-op nerves can really do you in. Let me tell  you that my worst fear was vomiting and nausea. I am 9 days post op and I have not puked once. Not even once. I had it all over my chart that nausea was a problem for me and the staff was great about getting the anti nausea meds in me before I had any issues. My recovery has been so good I am astounded. The truth is, I am having a typical recovery. I am not one of the lucky few.  You have to remember that the huge majority of us recover very well without incident but these are the people that rarely post here so you go into this surgery expecting some minor complications at least. Don't do that to yourself. Now granted I did not have the puking issues going in that you are dealing with and to that end I would recommend tranquilizers in the short term. Maybe start taking the anti nausea meds now. But recovery-wise, you are anticipating a situation that is unlikely to happen.

You will be a bit sore immediately post op but the pain meds will keep that under control. It isn't horrible at all. I got off the morphine drip by the second day.  At some point they will have the nerve to ask you to get out of bed and walk. You will not want to do it because you will be tired but I am telling you, it really helps. My first walk lasted about 10 feet. You do what you can do. It got better after that and it got better fast. In no time I could walk the entire floor (Verdugo Hills Hospital so we are talking small floors.)  In a couple of days I was doing multiple laps and it felt sooo good. My biggest issue was passing gas and I needed a suppository to get me going.  Once I could do that (45 minutes later...) I felt even better. Just before you get up to walk, hit the pain meds button. It makes it easier to get out of bed.

I can't tell you how pleasantly surprised I was/continue to be by my quick recovery. Like you, I expected it to be unpleasant. It hasn't been. Stay on the pain meds for as long as you need them and take your time. You will get anti nausea meds and the surgeon will prescribe anti nausea pills to take home with you. Root canal surgery was worse than this, honestly. Feel free to PM me if you have any questions about my experiences thus far.

Thanks so much for all of the positive thoughts. I'm PMing you now.

Sher-

On November 19, 2011 at 4:23 AM Pacific Time, sandyv63 wrote:
"At some point they will have the nerve to ask you to get out of bed and walk. "

They got me up exactly two hours after I came back from recovery, and every two hours after that like clockwork!

Don't let that scare you, though...it helps to restore bowel motility, and that's what you want!

Like Sandy said, hit the pump just before your walk, and you'll do fine!  It's a big surgery, definitely not pain free, but you can minimize the discomfort. 

Hey there!  Obviously, I'm not a vet, but!  I am going through some of the back and forth that you are.  Honestly, it just sounds like your nerves are surfacing.  Some of the fears I've had over the past two months:

- not being able to be diligent with meds: Had to prove to myself that I could get into a routine and stick to it.  So I started on vitamins a month ago and take them 3 times a day, using my handy vitamin organizer, and feel certain that I'll have no problems with this in the future.

-dying: This one hits me randomly... I have no doubts about my surgeon, and I really have no health issues that would cause me to not make it through.  So, instead of freaking out about it, I try to turn those doubting thoughts around really quickly with the reassurance that I could really just die any day anyhow, and that my life really has no regrets.  My family all knows how much they mean to me, as well as my closest friends.  This is the most important thing to me, so I take solace in that.

- being super sick with bathroom issues for a long while after surgery: I think this one is a more realistic fear than the other two.  So, I've stocked up on sprays, devrom, and anything else I've read about that will at least take the stink out of things. lol  Throwing up causes me anxiety, and I hate hate hate it (of course, who out there could possibly like it), so I already avoid foods that make me ill.  I'll just slowly experiment with things to see what I have allergies to.  Fingers crossed for no stitures or fissures.  Ouch!

You have to just be realistic here.  If you think people who have had any WLS never get sick for an extended time and miss out on some of their vites while they're sick, you're wrong.  If you continue to have issues with nervous stomach every year, you should have a contingency plan for when that starts.  Make sure you are keeping yourself hydrated.  That should be the #1 fear.  If you've been diligent with your vitamins the whole time and your levels look good, 2 weeks won't crash you.  Just take them when you can.

I think the idea of counseling for this issue is a great idea.  I have anxiety issues that surface (not medicated for them), and my therapist is really good about helping me figure out what I need to do in order to manage my emotions and stress.  I'd definitely check into it.

Best of luck, surgery sister!  You're gonna be just fine!

Great advice and I'm sure we'll be keeping up with one another as we progress through this journey!

Sher-

I'm phobic about puking, too, or used to be. One lovely-for-me side effect of the DS is that the Grossness Factor of barfing is dramatically reduced. Less volume, less acid, less painful, very different experience overall. So my revulsion has been cut wayyyyyy back. Thankfully I puke only very infrequently.

(I'm trying to convey enough detail without TMI here....Sorry if I missed the mark.)

Elizabeth, I've been waiting to hear from you about this! You've brought up a good point about puking.  Still, feeling nauseous can be worse than actually puking so there is still that factor. Just call me Negative Nancy. 

Thanks for the help. And feel free to kick me in the ass a few times about my doubts presurgery.

Sheri