so it totally happened

i'm going to keep this short but essentially, my best friend and i stopped speaking. i had posted a few months ago that she screamed, insulted and cried at me for two weeks before begrudgingly telling me 'she'll support me with any stupid thing i do' since then we've had very good talks abut my surgery and the future of it and all.
that is, until i got my surgery in september, we were fine while i was immediately post op, her mom even got me lovely flowers in the hopsital, but then after the second week she was saying stuff like 'she feels sad and pities me and anyone who would take such drastic measures and there should be better weight loss programs for people before they opt for surgery' it seemed as if she was completely resenting me and probably a bit fearful that i would 'change' maybe? she even insulted my jewish heritage which i am still pissed the **** off about. she was just bringing out her arsenal, whether consciously or un. the last straw was when i made a private list on fb (about ten or so friends who were interested in my progress) and posted pics i am taking every two weeks in my kitchen in bra and panties. i have never had a problem showing off my body fat or not, i have a healthy confidence about me, it could be better of course. so she relentlessly tore into me about how stupid it was to do and mocked and laughed and said 'of course you're going to lose weight!' then we jsut ended the call and haven't spoken since and i really have no interest in speaking to her any time soon.
i'm still the same dork i've always been, why can't she trust in that??? she thinks i'm going to turn into some skinny **** or something.
would love some advice or anyhting

She has way too many issues with your weight...or maybe hers?

--g

My one close friend at the time I had surgery absolutely could not take the change in me.  She created a big deal out of a little thing and we ended our friendship on a very bad note.

It was totally about the change in the power of the relationship. 

I'm sorry for your loss but we see it often.  Spend your energy finding new friends who can embrace the healthy new you.

~Becky

ahhh weight loss will change almost all relationships (if not all) either better or worse.  interestingly enough I have found, for me it stems from jealousy.  it was ok when i was the fattest at 300+ lbs, but when you are 125, you are no longer the focus of attention--you should lose weight conversations, they have now shifted to someone else, and who the hell are you to do that to me, now i am the fattest and you are the skinny *****WHAT?  for some reason, women are worse , in my case, gessh what is wrong with them?  I have this issue with a sister, who tormented me for years (first WLS 9 years ago) it got to the point where i had to let it go, and her.  you can only control youself.  when someone tries to put you down, it is usually because of their short comings, not yours.  let her go, work on yourself, change youself for the better, forgive her, but protect yourself as forgiveness does not mean being a doormat.  right now that relationship can not be salvaged but you don't know what the future will bring.  demand respect, treat youself and others with kindness and love, and if others don't treat you that way, it is time to leave that relationship.  I hope you find some peace, unfortunetly this will not be you only weight loss issue with people....but you will get much better dealing with them....

How old is this person? my lord.. what a douche

Katie, you don't post often, but when you do, omg I love it! It always makes me smile. Do you ever travel to/through the Jackson area? I'd love to meet up sometime.

36, 3 older than me. and thanks for helping me out guys, i'm not having problems with anyone other than her and you're right, i gotta stop being wlaked on and concentrate on my recovery and continuing health. i'll not worry about this any longer.

I'm sorry you had to lose a friend in such a strange way.
People are really weird when you get weight loss surgery. In my family, everyone is talking to my mom about my surgery. She is 81 and I am 51--that is just weird. She asks me questions she gets from them that totally come across that they think I am lying about my diabetes and blood pressure already being fixed.

I understand this completly, my mom is 77, I get the same thing, siblings can be the worse....can't pick you family

see my parents are totally supportive as is my husband and his family and all my other friends whether or not they approve- they are all being honest with me.