Okay...I have no social skills...I'll be the one to do it...
You are right, Sue, you don't have "social skills" but thank God for it. You, Diana and EN tell it straight. When I was a pre-op and newbie I read and listened to everything you said.
While some may not agree with the way you give advise they can't discount the value of it. If even one person has that "wait a minute" thought then you have done what you set out to do. Thanks.
Nancy
Yep, right there with you, Kristi! I live on these boards and this is my lifeline as well. I take heed to what the vets say and I don't give two beans how it's delivered, I wear big girl panties, and I mean REALLY big, so it doesn't hurt my tender feelings! I want to know everything I can know, especially what is kept in safety deposit boxes and behind closed doors, let no stone be unturned!
you have done good & continue to do good - I can almost hear the pre-ops out there rethinking "somebody has to be a surgeon's first"
as I'm sure you know, it's perfectly natural to feel some guilt despite having done all you could. and also anger at the woman who didn't listen when you & Kirmy spelled out for her exactly why this was a bad idea.
those two posts in this thread ought to be stickied on EVERY OH forum, I mean it.
www.obesityhelp.com/forums/ds/4229373/Calling-all-Dr-Roslin- pre-or-post-ops-or-anyone-who-can/#34736081
as I'm sure you know, it's perfectly natural to feel some guilt despite having done all you could. and also anger at the woman who didn't listen when you & Kirmy spelled out for her exactly why this was a bad idea.
those two posts in this thread ought to be stickied on EVERY OH forum, I mean it.
www.obesityhelp.com/forums/ds/4229373/Calling-all-Dr-Roslin- pre-or-post-ops-or-anyone-who-can/#34736081
once upon a time I had a group to talk about Binge Eating Disorder, and later one about Clean Eating.
PM me if you are interested in either of these.
size 8, life is great
Well, Ms. Sue, you know I think the sun sets and rises over you, so that's a moot point. You are my alter ego - I aspire to have your "lack of social skills," but those rainbows and unicorns have been dogging me for too much of my life to make much change now, at the age of 50.
At any rate, when I read of tragedies such as this, I also feel a tremendous sense of guilt. I was one of the lucky ones. I was my surgeon's twelfth DS. Granted, this man was a highly experienced abdominal trauma surgeon, had, at the time, done something like 1,000 RNY's, and had proctored under an extremely experienced DS surgeon, but still, I was his twelfth. The only assurance I had at that time was his word of honor. I asked him, "Are you sure, having only done eleven DS's before me, that you feel confident doing this?" And he answered, "Even if my own sister asked me the same question, I would answer, yes, that I do." I blindly and naively trusted him with my innards and my life, , not even, really, knowing that much about the complexities of the DS itself. I had only been on the DS boards a month before having my DS. I knew NOTHING about this surgery until I stumbled across these boards, and even though I researched my ass off, still, really didn't know that much, compared to what I know now. I look back at how stupid I was then and I just shake my head and say a brief prayer of gratitude to the great spirit that I turned out okay. Kemmeter could have been a Hottentot, or a Warden, or a Juarez. Instead, he's now highly respected in the DS world, and even though I have a sense of pride in knowing that I had a hand in his being where he is, still, knowing what I know now, five years later, about how much can go wrong, I should have probably chosen someone who'd done more than 100 DS's. When I read of tragedies such as this, I feel like I got off easy, that I dodged a big bullet, or something.
You did your very best (and you do it well!) at warning this young lady of the risks. I understand your emotions completely. The older we get, the more of the world we seem to carry on our shoulders, eh?
At any rate, when I read of tragedies such as this, I also feel a tremendous sense of guilt. I was one of the lucky ones. I was my surgeon's twelfth DS. Granted, this man was a highly experienced abdominal trauma surgeon, had, at the time, done something like 1,000 RNY's, and had proctored under an extremely experienced DS surgeon, but still, I was his twelfth. The only assurance I had at that time was his word of honor. I asked him, "Are you sure, having only done eleven DS's before me, that you feel confident doing this?" And he answered, "Even if my own sister asked me the same question, I would answer, yes, that I do." I blindly and naively trusted him with my innards and my life, , not even, really, knowing that much about the complexities of the DS itself. I had only been on the DS boards a month before having my DS. I knew NOTHING about this surgery until I stumbled across these boards, and even though I researched my ass off, still, really didn't know that much, compared to what I know now. I look back at how stupid I was then and I just shake my head and say a brief prayer of gratitude to the great spirit that I turned out okay. Kemmeter could have been a Hottentot, or a Warden, or a Juarez. Instead, he's now highly respected in the DS world, and even though I have a sense of pride in knowing that I had a hand in his being where he is, still, knowing what I know now, five years later, about how much can go wrong, I should have probably chosen someone who'd done more than 100 DS's. When I read of tragedies such as this, I feel like I got off easy, that I dodged a big bullet, or something.
You did your very best (and you do it well!) at warning this young lady of the risks. I understand your emotions completely. The older we get, the more of the world we seem to carry on our shoulders, eh?
Julie R - Ludington, Michigan
Duodenal Switch 08/09/06 - Dr. Paul Kemmeter, Grand Rapids, Michigan
HW: 282 - 5'4"
SW: 268
GW: 135
CW: 125
Duodenal Switch 08/09/06 - Dr. Paul Kemmeter, Grand Rapids, Michigan
HW: 282 - 5'4"
SW: 268
GW: 135
CW: 125
I agree with Julie.....I also did minimal research and luckily (for me) ended up having Dr. Hess do my surgery. This was back in the dark ages (1994) and I knew nothing about these boards.
Now, however there is an abundant amount of great research available here.....so you can only put it out there and hope as a vet, that the newbies listen. I also understand the world of being obese, and the strong desire to leave that place. But you STILL need to listen to the voice of experience, right?? Sue, you did what you could. You have a clear strong voice here with a valid message. Your input is valuable.
Marilyn
Now, however there is an abundant amount of great research available here.....so you can only put it out there and hope as a vet, that the newbies listen. I also understand the world of being obese, and the strong desire to leave that place. But you STILL need to listen to the voice of experience, right?? Sue, you did what you could. You have a clear strong voice here with a valid message. Your input is valuable.
Marilyn
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