In tears and not even on the plane yet...

I know this will probably sound stupid but I have a flight and I'm a little worried about whether or not I'll be surprised with a "you have to buy an extra ticket because you're too large".  I called to find out the seat sizes which I was told is 18" wide and you have to be able to fit in it with both seat arms down in order to not have to pay for an extra ticket...I think I can do it though it will be tight.  My hubby is not overweight and he even thought 18" was crazy small.  Then I noticed that the airline's website says that you should reserve a seatbelt extender before your flight, so I called to do so.  I asked them what the length of the seatbelt was and nobody could tell me so I said to just reserve me the extender to be safe.  After have the rep tell me for about 30 minutes that the reason they have these new guidelines for "big people" is because "big people" make "regular people" uncomfortable.  Well, I'm so sorry that my being overweight is so uncomfortable to others who don't know me and only have to sit by me for a few hours.  Finally, after 30 minutes they explained that they couldn't reserve the extender for me (even though their info says I'm supposed to) but that when I get there an attendant will help me to determine if I need an extender.  By this time I was completely upset and in tears and said fine I'll just let them embarass me in front of everyone and see if I need the extender.  She said not to be embarassed that they would either try it on the plane or maybe in a room where nobody can see.  I just know they'll do it on the plane where everyone can watch my humiliation.

Maybe I'm being stupid about this but it just hurts so much, I feel like I have some weird disease that strangers are afraid they're going to catch by being too close to me.  I'm so tired of living in a society where just because I'm not average I have to be subjected to what I feel is a humiliating situation.  My hubby had to leave for work while I was crying and he was trying to be supportive and kept telling me that soon I won't ever have to worry about this again.  I'm just glad that I'm going by myself and my family doesn't have to be embarassed by me as well.

Ok, enough crying and pity for one day...thanks everyone for letting me get it out.

Dawn

 Dawn,

I totally feel your pain.  Flying on a plane has been a great source of anxiety for me as well.  When my husband and I went on our honeymoon to Hawaii I had to ask for a seatbelt extender.  On one leg of the flight, they had trouble finding one but eventually did.  On the other, the flight attendant was so curteous and discreet about it.  She had it rolled up and nobody could even see it.  I would ask for it right away when you walk in and see the flight attendant.  That way, most people will be preoccupied with finding their own seats and getting their stuff in the overhead bins and getting situated.  Unless one of the attendants shouts it from one end of plane to the other, very few people, if anyone, will notice.  

Since then, I bought an extender on ebay for like $10.  Go figure...I never had to use it after that.  Of course, on my honeymoon I weighed my lifetime max of 325.  Also, I don't know when you are leaving, but if you can check in online, you may be able to upgrade to first class.  It's not as much as another ticket when you already have purchased one, but you will definitely have more room.  Just a suggestion to check on...

Sandy

Dawn,
I know exactly how you feel. I think most of us HERE do. I haven't flown for over 24 years for that exact reason. We DRIVE everywhere we decide we need to go. We pack up the 3 kids and a pretty good sized dog, and head off in the minivan. One day I hope that I will be able to, without worry of ridicule, buy a plane ticket to where ever i'd like to go. :) I've already tackled the restaurant booth with success, oh, and the movie theater's tiny seats. :D
You'll be there soon too. :D

I am sorry that you are upset. My dh always asks for a seat belt extender as soon as we walk on the plane. If they don't have one handy, they always bring it back to where we are sitting. We fly a lot and he has never had to buy an additional seat. As long as you put the arm up between your seat and his you should be just fine. Try to take a deep breath and concentrate on the things that are within your control, like having a wonderful time

If they are going to charge extra for MO people because they make others "uncomfortable" then they also need to charge extra for the people that hog the arm rest, the people that insist on talking to you while you read, and the guy who feels the need to pee every 10 minutes. Those are the people making everyone uncomfortable lol. Good luck to you though! I'm sure you will be fine.

As for making the other people sitting in your row uncomfortable, it's a physical thing, it just is what it is. I felt bad for my son and his friend during our trip to Florida this year because I took up more than my own seat. That would make a stranger even more uncomfortable to have me sharing a part of his seat as well as all of mine. No drama, it just is. Like you said, you won't have to worry about it soon.

I have a BMI of 59. I fly all the time. I used to ask the attendant for an extender when they greet you upon boarding. They were always discreet. Eventually I got one of my own. I only have to use a small fraction of the extender. Don't worry! It will be okay!

Kristen

Thanks everyone for the kind words and encouragement.  I feel better.

Dawn

I could mail you mine!

How sweet...thank you!  I actually went on Ebay and found the one that is used by the airline that I'm using (luckily it's the most common) so I'll have one just in case.

Dawn