Even at 2 years post op, I'm still having wows.
Today I braved the heat and my self image issues and went to the pool. I fretted the whole way there and even after I got there I fretted about how awful my legs look, but I looked around and saw what others were wearing and how no one was really staring at anyone. After seeing what people had on, both thick and thin, some which made my head shake in "what were you thinking" moment, I realized that my legs will just have to be what they are (wrinkly and loose) and that if a woman who had three kids, sporting a very large stretchmarked belly hanging over the bottoms of her two piece well, I shouldn't worry about my floppy legs or my batwings. Afterall, I got the most modest bathsuit I could find. Some folks there couldn't say the same. I mustered up all my courage to walk from my towel to the edge of the pool and I got in as gracefully as I could. I expected people to stare at me, to whisper nasty comments just out of my hearing or to laugh as teens are prone to do and you know that it is you they are laughing at. The thing is, no one took any notice of me except one woman who asked me where I got my "cute polka dotted bathing suit."
What came out of my trip today was a couple of wows. One, no one really doesn't care what I look like at the pool. The only one that cared is me. The only hard bodies were those of a couple of young male teenish boys sporting six packs. And two, which was a big WOW for me is that I no longer float. I sink. This one made me giggle. I used to just hang out in the deep end and never have to tread water. My body was so bouyant. But today, I found that I HAD to tread water in order to stay afloat. I even tried floating on my back. Something I have ALWAYS been able to do and for heavens sake, I couldn't stay above the water. I'm a sinker, and I like it!
Maddie