OT why does life have to suck?????

i am recovering from plastics almost 3 weeks ago. a week and a half ago my 16 year old cousin had an emergency appendectomy. his appendix had ruptured and the procedure was done lap. he has had 2 more lap procedures done since then to remove pockets of infection. 2 days ago his dad had a massive stroke (not his first) while my aunt was still at the hospital with my cousin. my uncle was lifelined to st vincents in indy. as soon as my cousin was released from the hospital here in lafayette, my aunt and all 3 of her kids rushed to indy. today my mom got the call saying that there was no detectable brain activity and they were pulling him off of life support. my uncle has been on disability since his first stroke left him partially paralyzed over 16 years ago. my aunt has never worked and is pretty much disabled herself. i dont know how she is going to survive this physically, emotionally or financially. i dont have the extra cash to go be with her in indy. even if i did i dont know if i could physically handle the trip as even short in town trips are still very painful. as far as i know none of my family is with her and she is dealing with his family saying she is killing him if she pulls the plug. it has always been his wishes that he not be kept alive by machine but none of his family knows this because the almost never have any contact with him or my aunt even though they all live in the same town. please keep this family in your thoughts. i am so  stressed over all of this that i had my first panic attack in almost a year.

I want you to know that I am praying for you and your family.I can only say that things will work themselves out. Your aunt knows she is not killing him, she is following his wishes. I hope that she can take comfort in that. Perhaps once things are settled, she can move back closer to her family where she has a supportive network in you and your mother (and perhaps others). That's what my mother did. i understand that you feel terrible knowing what's happening, but you need to take care of yourself so that they aren't worried about you. I'm sure she knows why you can't be there and is understanding of that. Even though you can't be there physically, you do have other options like the phone and/or emails.

Take care of yourself and if you need support, know that we are here for you.

*Sigh*

Why do things like this happen?  And in BULK!

I'm so so so sorry for you and your family.  You're in my thoughts. 

That sure is a lot for any family to go through!  I am so sorry that is going on and will pray for your Aunt to have peace with her decision which is what he wanted!  I hope his family will come to terms with that, maybe it just really has not sunk in yet. Take care of yourself!

I will be thinking of your family in the coming days. It's not easy to make that decision but sometimes you have to. I hope she finds comfort knowing it's what HE wanted. HUGS


Ruby

I'm so sorry that you and your family are going through such distress.  It's hard to lose our loved ones, but to make these decisions are always hard, even if you know it's what needs to be done. Just be there on the phone for love and support, but take care of yourself, your Uncle would want that for you!

Hugs, Diane

Hi Honey,
I don;t really have any advice for you...but as someone who just had 2 yrs of constant bad family stuff/financial stuff happening, all I can tell you is that bad things happen to good people and that as a family you will help your aunt het through this in some way.

You can only do your best and comprimising your own health won;t help her or your uncle and sometime just talking on the phone can help (a supportive phone call from a loved one once a day got me through some of my worst times). Tell her once you're recovered you will spend some time with her...what I found after i lost my husband suddenly and tragically, there was alot of people wanting to help right after....but I really needed some help a few months afterwards when everyone else haqd gone back to their own lives ya know...so you can be the one to do this!!
My thoughts are with you and your family

Yorkie xx