Going back home six years and 146 pounds later

 
Awwww.... Julie, it sounds like a bitter-sweet evening.

I'm so glad you had the opportunity to see some of your past students!!  That must have been a real treat!!

As for those who were so ignorant and socially inept, just let it go (easier said than done).

As the saying goes, "You've come a long way, baby!".  

It truly is their loss - that they are so shallow and so vain.  Thank your lucky stars your mind (and heart) don't work that way!!!!  YOU are the winner, here!!!

Proud of you for going - and staying.  Pat yourself on the back for facing them!!  And then, take some satisfaction in the "new" Julie.  She's pretty special - in and out.  

XOXO!!!!
(the other) Julie

ETA - By the way...... you really DO look fantastic  - and that dress is smooookin'!  :-)

First of all, Julie, damn you look fantastic!  I knew you were tiny, but that dress shows that you have some killer curves, too.  No wonder you were turning heads.

It sounds like the whole experience was bittersweet for you.  It's great that you could feel and look so fantastic going back home, but I know how insensitive some people can be with their comments.  I've had similar things happen to me.  It's almost as if these people dont even see us as the same person we once were - that they find it perfectly ok to talk ABOUT the "old"  us and not realize they're talking TO us....if that makes sense. 

And PS I love your haircut

Thank you, Joanne!   And that's the "pre-Spanx" picture.    I had absolutely nothing on underneath of it...  LOL      I did get a little shrug at Nordstrom to cover my saggy upper arms and I'm glad I did, because it was chilly at the reception.  I did get a few questions about whether I'd had any "work" done, and sadly, no, not yet.

I like your comment about not talking "to" the new us, and yes, you're making perfect sense.....it's almost like the "old" us went away, right along with our feelings, and that they therefore cannot hurt us if they speak about the "old" us insensitively.

Julie -

Seems that you had one great big mind f*** yesterday.  For me, your post reinforced what I've always hoped for through this experience -- being the same person can happen!  I keep reading about how people are NEW & IMPROVED.  Frankly, I like who I am and I worked hard to be who I am today.  So I wasn't really looking to change that person so much (by way of the DS).  As for you -- sure, your body changed, but as you said, your soul didn't. 

I think, if I had been in that position, I might have felt very sad about the whole thing.  Sad that people don't seem to think that you were "worth it" before, but now because of your appearance, you're deemed "good enough."  What the heck is that all about?  And why do overweight people have to say that it is OK?  It's not.  But I think with the shame that surrounds our appearance, we naturally excuse away the poor behavior of others.  I think this post will go through my mind on occasion -- thanks for sharing it and not making it the be-all-end-all experience we think it would be.

I can only hope to be able to one day do what you accomplished -- because for me, in reading your post, all I came across thinking was, "Damn does this gal have POISE!"  When I grow up, I want to be able to handle myself as gracefully as you just did!  Congrats!

Anyway, I've been thinking a great deal about this experience since last night, and I feel rather sad that it took losing 146 pounds to capture that kind of attention.   Never mind that my son was valedictorian of his class and went on to MIT or that my daughter was salutatorian.   Never mind that I'd hosted dozens of exchange students and was a respected piano teacher.  People pretty much ignored all that.    They only paid attention when I became thin.    I can understand their ability to do so - we are a very visually-oriented society, especially this area that I lived in, but damn,  even though I walked away feeling like a celebrity, I'm not in a terribly great place about it.

Here's my unsolicited advice based on the portion of your post that I copied:  Be proud of all the lives you touched and continue to touch with your teaching.  Your successful children that you bore and raised as well as those you taught will be your legacy.  Yes, in a visually oriented society, some recognition of your appearance is nice.  However, these superficial ****waffles are not worth occupying any permanent place in your mind.  It is sad that they are so shallow, yet that is totally out of your control.  All you can do from here on out is to continue to be the loving person you've always been and thank your lucky stars you escaped the Stepford Society of your past.

However, these superficial ****waffles are not worth occupying any permanent place in your mind.

Couldn't have said it better myself!!! Love the ****waffle comment...I'm going to steal this from you...lol

Julie, you look amazing and deserved every bit of the attention you received. I just had a similar experience at my fathers wedding. I couldn't believe how rude and obnoxious some of these people were to me. But then I realized that they had always been snarky and now they were just jealous and it made me feel a little bit of gratification knowing that they were thinking...Holy ****!

BTW - speaking of looking amazing - look at YOU

Abso-******lutely.....k9ophile pegged it. 

Julie, you are the bomb-diggity....and maybe, just maybe....as said "****waffles" (love it, BTW) wiped off their Shiseido mascara in the steamed mirrors of their million dollar master bathrooms after the wedding, they self-actualized and came full circle in their own minds as they thought about their shallowness.  That was YOUR night, girl.....you deserve every jealous thought that shot through their vacuum-filled (is that an oxymoron?) skulls.  Rock On!

I am sure your DH was one proud man that night!  You ROCK that dress.....ahem.....shoe pic please. 

I'll try to get you a pic of me IN the shoes, but for now, this link will have to suffice.   


http://www1.macys.com/catalog/product/index.ognc?ID=529520&C ategoryID=26481&LinkType=#fn=BRAND%3DMarc Fisher%26sp%3D1%26spc%3D8
Black patent leather.

You must be a foot man like my DH, LOL.    He's a very happy man when I get a pedicure.    When we got back to the hotel after the wedding the other night, he said, "Get those shoes back on and get in bed,"  LOL.

You look so lovely! What a sad commentary on those people, though, that most of them never acknowledged what really counts in life. I suspect you're better off where you are now.  You've done a lot of good for people, and as a piano teacher I'm sure you've touched a lot of young lives in a positive way. Always hold that in your heart and you'll be able to rise above vapid people like them.