Need a minute to vent about the forum, & advice/links for all newbies inside

When you are as far out as some of us are, and no longer need this board for everyday answers --- the drama helps to keep you entertained, so you will keep coming back and answering questions.... at least that is some of the draw for me!

Do you know how many people just drop out of sight once they have hit X goal?
How many people take & take, but never give back?

I challenge everyone complaining about this (not directed at *you* in particular Deb) to stick around this place and give as much as you were given.  Very few people can say that they have, and those that have are entitled to all the drama these crazies want to provide!

As a pre-op revisioner, I wanted to say Thank You for taking time to post these helpful links!!!!


-Jamie

 I am just going to put this out there in hopes that it will hold me to this promise. I too have been somewhat apprehensive about posting questions on things. I have been reading all this and trying to figure out why i am so cautious with it. Maybe it is because my mother was always telling me never to wear out my welcome, i don't know. With that being said, I hugely don't want to drain anyone of their emotion or information. I value the vets on this board more then they could ever know! I don't want to be someone that frustrates them and drives them from here for a while because they just need a time out. I have pmed Kel millions of questions and stuff and i still have this fear in the pit of my stomach that i have worn her out, even tho she said i don't.

I vow to make an effort to share my queries here with you all. I know i get so much from reading the answers that are given day in and day out to others questions. there is soooo much to learn and research! It is overwhelming and daunting at times. There are days when the clock chimes midnight and i am still in my pjs reading and reading and reading from that morning. I have no life. lol. gaining knowledge and insight and preparing  myself and my family and friends to the best of my abilities is an all time consuming task. I am sure i will ask some "dumb" questions but generally i am pretty thick-skinned. tho there are days when i am not...

So i guess what i am saying is i am afraid that the vets will become tired and frustrated and leave us all here to figure this out the hard way. I value all their wisdom. 

ETA: to fix a random thought that didn't make sense. Sorry i distract easily 

"Maybe it is because my mother was always telling me never to wear out my welcome"

Very good point - there is a wealth of knowledge on this forum and I must say that I know I asked the same questions over and over but truly never once felt like an idiot for asking, I am NOT one for confrontation but can handle some tough love too.

Remember with the good always comes some bad - roll with it.

 Lori, Thanks for this post. I have been post op a little over 11 months and I am very grateful to the forum for all the help and support offered to me. When this all started and grew bigger and bigger I felt uncomfortable. I have never belonged to a forum before and to be honest didn't know the unwritten rules. it made me wonder if my posts drove the vets crazy. I researched the DS and was prepared for surgery, I did lurk and I read old posts, and even Bev's website. I did it to learn it never dawned on me about forum etiquette, When this all played out I felt a little uncomfortable, realizing I may have with out realizing or meaning to bothered forum members. I still continue to read the forum every day because I always learn new things or get the kick in the butt to keep me on track.I use the PM's often not for fear of being flamed but because, like the wall on facebook, sometimes I don't want the whole OH world to read something private. I am glad everyone is speaking up with their own thoughts and opinions, I thought I should include my own. If we can put it all on the table we can have a better understanding and respect for each other.

Heather

You know what the DS board reminds me of? It reminds me of a utopian society that was once considered perfect until it was infiltrated by the outside world. Sorry people, but that's the only analogy I can think of! 

I feel like DS'ers are very protective of this board, and it's not hard to understand why.  When a lot of you vets decided to have surgery, even surgeons didn't know much about the DS. I've heard it mentioned that DS'ers were once considered the step children of the WLS world, so I see how you guys formed some pretty tight bonds on this board and IRL.  Also, it makes perfect sense that there are a lot of strong personalities here, because let's face it -- it takes a strong personality to go against the grain and insist on a surgery that requires a knowledge of your digestive system that only gastroenterologists possess.

Sooo, let's say I'm Mr./Ms. Newbie and I decide it's time for a revision.  I hear all these awesome things about the DS and decide to take a trip over to the DS board.  After hanging out of the RNY or lap band board for years, my idea of support is heavily skewed towards sunshine and rainbows. So I bounce over to the DS board, and my first post is something like "HELP! Tell Me about the DS!" On any other board, this type of post would elicit a ton of supportive, informative answers, but on the DS board it's a trainwreck.  Why?  Because in people's minds, they see that uninformed/unprepared newbie as a potential mortality. The moment I knew this surgey was no joke was when I saw the vitamin schedule AND realized I'd have to understand my insides better than most doctors. It's serious, and somebody who appears to want a DS only because they want to get skinny or eat whatever they want really disturbs me. The DS is an extraordinary surgery that requires extraordinary knowledge and research.  

With the recent drama, I'm realizing some people have such an overwhelming need for the attention and support their not receiving at home, that they don't take the time to understand the board dynamics, let alone reasearch this surgery thoroughly. I guess the big question is how to deal with people who  believe forming bonds is more important than understanding the DS.

As I have said to you many many times - THANK-YOU! 

You are a beautiful person both inside and out.

Should I give you or Val my address for the toaster?