Need a minute to vent about the forum, & advice/links for all newbies inside

(Sorry guys, this turned out way longer than I anticipated).  If you want the short and sweet of what is about to be said, Sia said it best....

ETA:  "I guess I just say to these people who fear writing on the board: If you give us a chance, we'll give you a chance. If you love us, we'll love you back. You get out what you put in. Period. So come join the party!"

If you'd like to continue reading my poorly put together thoughts, here's the rest of the post!  Lol!

Okay, I'm WAY behind on the boards as I stated in my earlier post, but the tone around here is just...WOW.  I haven't been around enough to really know why things are going the way they are.  I don't need everyone to agree with me, I'm simply stating my opinion.

So really, what's your take on what's happening on the boards?  I'm not "getting" the new and apparently recent annoyance with the newbies.  I'm not understanding why newbies have to pm me because they're scared to death to ask a simple question and get flamed.  I don't look at the DS forum as JUST a support board, hell I come here for entertainment, friendship, debating, support, and lots more.   I get the gonecrazyinky thing, no matter what peeps say she isn't getting the messages, but how the hell do we get back to supporting the newbies so they feel comfortable posting?  I mean, damn guys.... we were all new once and really didn't get it all in the beginning...I can't tell you how many vets were patient with me.  Some of us come to the board with more questions than others.  As someone who's been here for almost three years now, I can tell you that if I don't FEEL like answering a question that's being asked, I just *don't.*  If I feel like I have something to add, I will.  I don't get mad because I remember how confusing it all is in the beginning.  There are so many different things to learn about life after the DS.  We are each responsible for the experience that we have here on the forum.  I've never taken anything too seriously, because as much as I'm here, this forum doesn't make me the person I am in real life.  I come here because I love everyone, I come here because I NEED each of you for many different reasons, and I come here because I truly believe there's no reason for those following in my footsteps to struggle when they can just ask for help. 

That said, I'd like to just offer advice to anyone who's a newbie pre-op or post op.  When I was new around here,  I went through everyone's profiles that had more than 6 months under their belts to see what info they may have put on their blog.  I googled everything known to man to educate myself, and then asked questions when I couldn't find the answer. I never WORRIED about people coming down on me for asking questions.  And if I put the question out there, I listened whole heartedly to everything being said to me.   Everytime I found something significant, I bookmarked it, or copied and pasted it to my profile.  I made my profile my encyclopedia of recipes, advice, good issues that came up on the boards, good links to peer reviewed studies and so on.  I also bookmarked the heck out of anything that i may need for future use.  I knew I wanted to pay it forward like the vets had done for me with patience and understanding.  You may not like a person's delivery, but each of the vets have our own way to answer questions.  Some will be kind, others will give you tough love, others will tell you in a different way.  Try not to take offense or bite hands when the answers may not be your favorite, just learn what you can from each person and take with you what is most important. 

I'd also just like to add some great links that will answer MANY of your questions as you are researching different topics. 

I hope these links will help you like they have me.

Should EVERYONE have the DS?

Insurance says DS investigational: a how-to manual

A MUST READ- More about Small Bowel Obstruction! I


Hey new-ops and soon to be new-ops, some info to h

Wanna know if your ****'s gonna stink after the DS

Bathroom Issues - Dina McB

DS is not an "eat anything you want" surgery

SITES TO BOOKMARK THREADS FOR NEWBIES


For The Vets: What's Your Thing? Tell What You Kno

Some of you newbies and DS wannabes **** me off. L

Okay, I'm ready. Let's get our list of tips on how

Do not forget to visit DSfacts.com as well as duodenalswitch.com.  I'm happy to answer any questions, but the PM's asking for help only help *one* person.  It needs to be out here on the boards for all to see, so that we can benefit more than just one person at a time.   

I don't know why I felt the need to post all of this, and if you've read this far I'll have Val send you a toaster for being such a good sport.  I love drama on the boards just as much as the next person, but I think it's time for newbies to arm themselves with knowledge, before asking questions, and time for vets to stop clicking on the newbie threads that  we don't want to answer.
I know I'm being all rainbows and sunshine, but it seems like we need that right now.  I don't expect everyone to agree with me, I'm just venting my own feelings. Thanks for listening.

Lori

Ahh...you're getting those PMs too!?

Yup, I logged on this morning and had 18 unread pm's.  I'm nowhere near getting them all answered, don't even know where to start.

Lori

In the words of those four guys from across the pond

All we nee is love.....Lori you are all sunshine and rainbows and that's a good thing. No one should be afraid to seek help for themselves. Thank you for always being a good hostess

P.S. I read the whole post when do I get my toaster?

I'll let Val know, she's got the motherload of toasters over at her place!

How do I let Val know where to send my toaster?

Lori, you have put very good advice and links, and your heart in this post. Thank-you.
I, for one, have been lurking, and not posting. (I don't want anyone to perceive me wrong.) I love this board, and all of my new friends. I have learned so much here, and found support. I want to still be here in ten years and help out other pre-ops. I have been a member for awhile, and am finally on my last turn, before surgery. (My External Review is due tomorrow.) I do want to feel like I can ask, or answer, if necessary, without having to worry too much.
Thank-you for your post.
Marsha

I hope the "Magical Forum Fairy" can help us.

Marsha,    sending good vibes that your external review wraps this up for you tomorrow!
Love your siggie line, btw!

Thanks so much Kimberly!  You are sweet.
Marsha

Shhh, don't say that so loud!!

I just read that you won --- CONGRATULATIONS!!!     

You know, when I first found this forum (Jan/Feb I think) there were lots of 'repeat' posts as newbies joined. HOWEVER, this was actually encouraged. I can't tell you how many times that I saw someone say - don't be afraid to post questions, even if they have been answered before, because they help all of the newbies on the board. I never felt weird or hesitant to post anything. Hahahah...oh, the good ol' days! Now I just ask my friends by PM when I have questions, and will continue to do that until the dust settles. It's hard to tell sometimes if you are one of the newbies included in the " I h8 newbies" posts so it's easier to just hide for a while. I'm glad that I've been around long enough to at least have 'friends' here.