Anyone still emotional from complications? 10 mo out

Hi.. I am 10 mos out from rny. I had complications. First surgery was fine, then was re-operated on one week later due to kinked intestine. Second operation almost did me in.. I almost didn't make it through. My intestines went all over the place when the went to move them, and I developed blood clots in my lungs. I will in the hospital for one month. I was very depressed in the hospital but that was because I couldnt see my 6 mo old and 18 month old children for so long. Things got better. I have lost 150 pounds and am still losing. I am soooo happy with how I look and feel. I am glad that I had the surgery. My problem is that I am very emotional now when people ask if I would do it again, or when I see that someone on this board didn't make it through surgery. My friend had surgery a few weeks ago for a hernia and went home the same day, and I think I felt jealous that she got to go home right away. I just felt awful how I felt. I really need to talk to someone about these issues. I don't know if I am just feeling guilty for what I put my family through or what. I am skinny now and loving life but when someone mentions something about what I went through, tears just start flowing. Is it just me, or does anyone else get like this, this far out? Any suggestions?

Susan, This sounds a bit like post traumatic stress disorder. I would talk to your PCP or go ahead and schedule an appointment with a counselor. I too had complications and was without my children for a little over 3 weeks. I know where you are coming from. I'm SO glad you are doing well now. Now if you could just get a little emotional help you'll be just fine. Hang in there and let us know how it goes. HUGS Kimberly

Thanks. I have an appt with my family doctor. I will mention the post traumatic stress disorder. I think it mostly bothers me what I put my children and husband through. Wow.. 5 kids! You are amazing. I only have two. I wanted more after rny.. but not now. I am too afraid. Thanks for the input. I appreciate it!

Hi! Read my profile! I had post-op pneumonia in feb. that almost killed me. I was hospitalized for over a month the intial time and have had numerous hospitalizations and four operations since, so I know exactly how you feel!! I as well have a three year old son. Email me! Tavia [email protected]

Wow. Sorry to hear yours was worse than mine. I hope you are doing well now. It is well worth it now with my children. I can do so much more with them, and I am not exhausted and can get up and down so easy! Life is great.. just a little emotional.. lol Thanks. Sue

Hi Susan, I had open RNY three months ago and had some complications during surgery to. I spend 3 days in icu because i had bloodclots in my lungs.I also got very depressed after i realised what happened and that i almost didn't make it through. I have 2,5 yr old twin boys and i felt so guilty about it, i don't have to imagine what would have happened to them if i didn't make it. Up to this day i still have second thoughts about my RNY but probably because so far it didn't bring me much goods yet. I have to have daily shots with bloodthinners because of the lungemboly for a total of 6 months, so hopefully after i'm done with those i can concentrate better on the good things of RNY. I know very much what you are going through and still try to deal with it to. My only positive thought is that i'm still here and i'm trying to take it from there Take care and the best of luck !

Thanks Carine. I actually have an appt tomorrow with a counselor. I saw my physician and she agreed I am suffering from post traumatic stress syndrome. Once I talk about it, I think I will be fine. I can tell you that I was on coumidin for almost 8 months, and when I got off of that, it made the world of difference to me. Foods tasted better too. I feel incredible now and am actually getting thin.. I am being told too thin! So it is a marvelous thing. Good luck to you! Sincerely, Sue

"My only positive thought is that i'm still here and i'm trying to take it from there" You know what? That is all you can do right now is just try to stay positive. I know exactly how you are feeling, trust me. People like yourself and I have been through the good(not really), the bad, and the ugly of this surgery. Most do not have experiences like us who are alive to talk about it. That is why are you are still here. To talk and educate others about your experience. They are coming from a certain point and we are coming from a certain point. I can understand you waking up every day and re-thinking yourself for making this decision to have this surgery. Seems pretty normal coming from where you had to go through. Every day from day one to about three months I thought "what did I do to myself and family?". But you know what? Slowly but surely it gets better and I have gotten better. Mind you, that doesnt take away the fact of what happened to me but I have learned to accept that was my experience and have tried to turn it into a positive thing. I feel I have become a form of "poster child" for complications for WLS. I talked to people all the time about my complications and most are very thankful to hear it from a real person then reading about complications than a piece of paper. They say it definitely makes it more "real". I say it how it was for me and I do not blame anyone for my complications, or bash WLS. It's all about find inner peace w/what happened, turning it into a positive think like helping others understand complications and moving on. Tavia

Medically Induced Trauma Support Services (MITSS), Inc. is a non-profit organization that supports, educates, trains, and offers assistance to individuals affected by medically induced trauma. The founder is a lady named Linda Kenney. She almost died during a hospitalization as a result of a medical error. I met her at a National Patient Safety Foundation conference when she was there telling her story. Go to www.mitss.org for more info. I don't know whether your complications were from medical error or something that was just going to happen regardless, but this group might be able to help you in healing your spirit. I wish you all the best. Sue ZQ

It is not just you, I feel the same way. The guilt with my children is at times overbearing. Not too long ago I spent a total of 6 weeks totally unable to care for them through a hurricane to boot. This was AFTER having 5 hospitalizations and 3 surgeries already. I am glad you are doing well now. You are not alone, don't ever feel as if you are.