I sent a WLS email to my family and friends~

I wanted to share what I send to my family and friends. Because I consider YOU my friends. It is very humbling and I haven't gotten a LOT of response yet, but I only sent it 1/2 hour ago ! Here it is: Dear Friends and Family~ Before I go into the "me" part of this email, I wanted to ask for your prayers concerning a dear friend. My friend Robyn's dad passed away very suddenly and unexpectedly over the holiday week, last week. I just ask that you keep Robyn and her family in your thoughts and prayers. Now, in typical "BECKY" fashion I am writing an email requesting your prayers. This time it's not about my wonderful children, it's about me. Because of my openness and belief in prayer, I can't NOT email you and ask for your support and friendship during this part of my life. Also, I believe that you love me and truly care about my well being. I count myself among the most blessed in the world to have you as my friends and family. Okay~ I am stalling... Here is the deal: After YEARS, yep, your read that right, YEARS of prayer and consideration I have decided to have GASTRIC BYPASS SURGERY. The specific surgery I am having is the Laparoscopic Roux-en-y. This is an intense weight loss surgery. I know that there is some controversy and a lot of misunderstanding out there about what that means. Here is a link if you are interested in researching more about it: http://www.obesityhelp.com You see, even though you all know me and love me. There are a few things you may not know about me. 1) The medical term for my body is SUPER MORBIDLY OBESE. That is probably THE hardest thing I have ever had to type and share with people I care about. Morbidly, means DEADLY. In short, I am deathly overweight. While I know that you are all well aware that I am (inside joke alert: smart, pretty, strong, altruistic) overweight, I am actually much worse than that. 2) When I get out of bed in the morning or get up from sitting for long periods of time I CANNOT move because of some severe joint issues. 3) I have never in my life NOT been overweight. 4) The one thing we know about my birth mother is that she was "a huge woman." 5) I struggle with some other weight related issues. My doctor has been recommending this surgery for a long time and I have tried to do everything I can to avoid it. But, the truth is I WANT TO LIVE. I want to see my children grow up, graduate, and grow older. I want to run with them and be active with them. Sitting on the sidelines is NOT my nature or personality. I so desperately want to do the things that most people take for granted. I want to walk without dying for air, I want to sit comfortably in a booth, and I want to ride comfortably in a car or airplane. I just want to LIVE! There are risks with the surgery. There is even a possibility of death, but there is a greater possibility of death WITHOUT it. My health is on the decline and I can't go on like this. I truly believe this surgery will save my life. Lastly, I want to address the issue of vanity. I am NOT doing this because I think that having surgery will turn me into an ultra hot BABE! Puh-lease, I am ALREADY an ultra hot babe. And more importantly, I am fearfully and wonderfully made, it tells me so in the Psalms 139! This IS NOT about looks. Actually, I will look saggy and probably older. I will most likely go through a time when I will lose some hair. But, I don't care about that, I care about LIVING. I want to live and in order to do that I need your prayer support. As of right now I do not have a surgery date. I know that it WILL be before the end of the year as the insurance gave a 12/31/05 deadline. I meet with the surgeon on Tuesday, November 29th. After that I will know the date. When I do know the date, I will email you. So, please, I beg you to pray for me as I enter this new stage of my life. I will have to change a lot of things, but not the fact that I am ME and I love YOU. I am scared of having surgery, but also excited about the possibilities. Here are some ways you can pray: ~For Ken, he is in Kyrgyzstan and will not be here for the surgery. Please pray for peace of mind. ~For my children, they will be staying with my parents and they will be missing BOTH mom and dad for a time. ~For the surgeon, Dr. Thaemert. (A cool God-incidence, his daughter attends Kaden's preschool. This also happens to be the preschool I work for. He shared that he is a Christian.) Pray that his hands will be swift and sure. ~For the surgery. That it will be COMPLETELY uneventful and there will be no complications. That I will be in and out of the hospital in no time and back to my family. Thanks for taking the time to read this. I know it's very long. I covet your prayers and would so appreciate your support. I also hope that if you have questions or concerns that you will email ME. After all, it's just me, Becky, the same Becky you have always known. Lord willing the only changes will be for God's glory. I hope that having surgery will help me lean on the Lord, love Him more, and that even this will glorify Him in some way. So much love and prayer is being sent with this letter~ Becky

that is a wonderful letter Becky. thank you for sharing it and i believe that the replies from friends and family will be very supportive. *hugs*

God bless your courage and conviction. I hope you receive positive feedback from them all. Happy Thanksgiving friend, Sally

Hi Becky, What a great email you sent out! I thank the Lord that you had the courage to do it. I was very open with my family, friends, and church family. The support and response I received was overwhelming. I had friends from former churches in towns where we use to live call and write me and encourage me. My church and several other churches were praying. My father is struggling with cancer and I told him that I was going to hold off on the surgery until he was better and he told me to go ahead because I would be a better help later. He was right. I'm still receiving phone calls and cards from friends encouraging me. People want to know what is going on in your life and really do care and they will appreciate your openess. When I was looking into WLS my husband struggled a little bit because he wanted me to know that I was unconditionally loved and if he said yes, he was afraid that I would think he didn't love me. We have still been working through that. We have been married 25 years and he never once got on me for my weight. After 6 weeks post op and 57 pounds down he is still struggling - but I told him that it would be fine to rejoice with me because I know that he loves me uncondtionally. I just told you all of that about my husband because that may be some of the reaction you get - people are sometimes afraid to support you in fear that you may think that they don't love you unconditionally. You have a beautiful, joyful heart and staying upbeat helps others around you be more encouraging for you to have the surgery and it is obvious by your email that is exactly what you are doing! Love ya! God Bless, Lynda Phil. 4:8

Becky, That is absolutely beautiful!!! It should touch the hearts of your family members greatly! Bless your heart! Love you! Cindy

Becky, Wow. I might need to copy and paste that email and use it myself. I have also chosen to keep my WLS a secret to many important people in my life. The only people I told were my husband, parents, and in-laws. I tried to think of how I would word a letter to tell them and you hit the nail on the head. My only thing is that I do not intend on sending any emails until very very late the night before surgery. I don't think that I have posted about this yet on this forum but I was struggling with how WLS could be God's will for my life and have to be done in secret. Then He took me to Matt 8:4 "And Jesus said to him, "See that you tell no one; but go your way..." This was said by Jesus to the leper he just healed. It was that verse that confirmed that it was God that wanted me to have this surgery for His glory. The reason that I feel that He wants me to tell no one is because so many people with feed me with negative comments and horror stories. With that I would allow fear to take a stronghold and let the enemy creap in. Okay enough about me let's talk about you...what do you think of me? Just kidding. I commend you for your strength to come out and say exactly what was on your heart and to say it with clarity and power. I pray that anyone who has something negative to say about WLS will keep it to themselves out of respect for your decision. God bless you Becky. Your requests of prayer show your trust and faith in the Lord. In Chirst, Dawn in NJ

Hi Becky, I'm so glad you consider us your friends. I do too. This is a beautiful letter/E-mail. You touched my heart. I agree that writing down that we are super morbidly obese is a very hard to to do(saying it is even worse). You are taking the steps to correct that. Having this surgery will be one of the best things you have ever done for yourself. I do believe you will get the needed support from your family and friends. You are in my prayers and on my prayer list. Take care of yourself ok. There's no need to be scared ~ that comes from the enemy. I was terrified for one full day. I asked for prayer from this forum, the Mi forum, and My church then I got on my knees (and I have really bad knees). The lord took that fear away from me. I didn't feel like that again. The enemy tried after that, but I wouldn't let him have a stronghold! Thank you Jesus. You will get through this Becky, and you will praise God for it! Try to hang in there. God bless you, Annette

Hi Becky! I was thinking about you...wondering if you have gotten any emails back yet. I also want to encourage you to stand strong. I know it was so difficult for you to write those things....especially sharing that you are super morbidly obese. Before long...your surgery will be done...and you will be recalculating where you are on that BMI chart. I recently had the little joy of being able to share that I am "just obese" now. Imagine how that will feel when you can do that! It won't be long! Please don't let others discourage you! It is only the enemy in disguise! God brought you to it...he will bring you through it. Many times those that are critical have their own issues anyway... Blessings, Stephanie

CONGRATULATIONS on being OBESE! How funny is that to write out!! You are doing wonderfully Stephanie. You must feel amazing. Your children and husband are simply beautiful. You are a woman BLESSED by God. Oh...and I LOVE Nicole C. Mullin~ "When I call on Jesus, mountains are gonna fall because He'll move HEAVEN and EARTH to come rescue me when I fall!" Oh, girl! LOVE HER. Plus I have a beautiful adopted daughter who is half black american. She is gorgeous and I can't wait until she understand Nicole C. Mullin's song "Black, White, Tan!" I saw Nicole and her daughter perform it LIVE...tears! Blessings~ Becky

Becky, Thanks for sharing that letter. What a wonderful way to share with family and friends. I need to send something out like that to my family and friends. Although most know I am having surgery on 12/16/05, they are still a little hesitant. JaNae