checking in

Hi Everyone, I am checking in with my new brothers and sisters on OH Christian board. I have still not quit smoking, but something changed, for the first time I finally see I am disobeying God directly and I am giving it another go tomorrow and I am determined, not just for the surgery but for my relationship with Him more than anything. I did not make it to church yet, everytime I think of going I feel like I am goingto have a panic attack. I don't know one person there, If I just knew one woman I could connect with it would make it so much easier, but since we moved from PA a year ago form out old church I just can't get myself to go. I miss my old church family so badly it hurts sometimes. Not that this is an excuse, but I am just realizing how much I miss them. I hate being in public this heavy and have for several years, another bad excuse but the truth. I am going to try and go to the womans bible study on Monday and see if I can get started there. I am still waiting on insurance approval I know the Lord is waiting on me to quit smoking, I can feel in my heart. So I have to for me. I am grateful you are hear, at least there are brothers and sisters I can connect with on some level that I can talk to even if I can't see your face. It feels good just to write this to you. In Him Trish

Hi Trish, First, let me tell you that God loves you no matter what. Smoking, overweight, not attending church, HE STILL LOVES YOU. Wrap your mind around that and don't forget it. Also, we all love you. And, I am sure that your future church family will love you when you find them. Second, you have to understand the nature of addiction. Nicotine addiction is the hardest addiction to break. Some say it is harder than Heroin. So, you are going to struggle with it. I know some people who tried and failed over and over again. Key is, they kept trying till they got it. Can you get the Patch to help you wean off the nicotine? Ask your doctor for help with it. Some have had great succes with the Patch. Also, there are some medications that help people quit smoking. Your family doctor may be able to help you with this. I think it is a great idea for you to attend the Women's Bible Study and get to know some of the ladies in that setting. It is probably less threatening. Don't be so hard on yourself. It is not easy to tackle smoking and the weight loss issues for anyone. I gave up drinking years ago, and gained most of my weight in the process. Big Hugs, Trish

Hey you, I was just thinking about you earlier and wondered how things were going. Remember YOU HAVEN'T FAILED, you just haven't succeeded yet, but you will!!! Trish is right, smoking is just like every other addiction and it takes alot of work and pain to get thru it. The reward will be great tho just think of all the extra years you will have to enjoy life. Try using some of the 12 step methods like just get thru it one day at a time or sometimes just get thru 1 minute at a time. Go, go, go to the women's Bible study trust me the Lord has someone waiting there just for you. These women will welcome you with open arms and help love you thru this difficult time. You know we here are praying for you too. Can't have too many prayer warroirs on your side! Hang in there sister. Karen

Good am Trish, I've just joined this board and am very happy I have. I have a different perspective than some regarding "making it to church." I do believe in going and went for many, many years until my early 20's when I stopped. My reasons then were my life had been spiraling out of control for some time and I wasn't "ready." I've personally found (as with most of the rest of the world****il you are ready to make those important steps to help yourself no one else can either. God gives us choices in Life and sometimes there are lessons to be taught and other times we are to teach a lesson. But, its those lessons we've learned that bring us closer to God and gives us more choices to head down a path that is true and real. You don't know anyone person at the church? Ahhh my beautiful friend but you DO. You KNOW God and that is the key. He is the reason you are going. The new family/friends you will meet there are his way of saying "join together and live, believe and love in me. Panic attacks are common for me especially when I have moments of pressure and sometimes they are a physical thing. However, turn those feelings into determination beginning with small steps. Call the Pastor of the church and ask to meet with him. Take a tour of the church and become acquainted with it. Ask about its attendees and what type of programs they have available. As for missing your old church don't. If at all possible keep up with those from that church and then begin again with new found hope, joy and thrive off of others who can be your strength in this time. The Woman's Bible Study group is a GREAT way to get started and its also a way for you to become part of something much bigger than you thought possible. So, you want to quit smoking, get approval for surgery, go to church and LIVE? So, FEAR is your culprit huh? Well, take your fear and become bigger than it and say God I am trying and I am going to do this for me and thank you for giving me the choice to do so. Ask for guidance and support from him and those around you. Best of all, WE here on the board will be saying many prayers and lifting you up! TODAY sweetie - that's what we have.... God Bless, Kat

Hi Sweetie, I am pretty sure that Paul, Peter, John and many of the other names we are all familar with from the beginnings of our faith did not really like to move around either. I am pretty sure that "making new friends" isn't any easier now than it was then. However, where would we all be if these guys stayed in one place and never moved past their own fears and insecurities. You are not alone in your fears - after being in one church for over 20 years my husband and I moved. Finding a new church was difficult on me as well - my old church loved me and accepted me (fat as I was). Well I have to say "praise God" for my new church. It had a recovery program that has really helped me with my post surgery weight loss. You do not know the plans he has for you until you step out in faith that He really is in control of your life. As for the smoking thing - after not smoking for over 27 years - I still struggle with not smoking. God is not "bargining" with you. He is not withholding something from you until you do "this or that". He may be encouraging you to quit, but that is a different story. Sister - believe in the power of prayer and let the uncertainty go. God is the same in your new church as he was in your old church. The only difference is that unless you go and see this for yourself, you will be held captive by your fears. Fear is not of God - but of Satan. Get back into fellowship - so nessesary for our spiritual health. Looking forward to hearing how your are progressing in your search for a church and your efforts to stop smoking. In His Grip - Sally