SCARED NEED SOMEONE TO READ PLEASE TAKE THE TIME TO PLEASE!

This is going to take forever but I need to write this and get thoughts, prayers! First topic I am dealing with. I have two boys one to a man who is so wicked I cannot explain but, he is. I married him because I was pregnant and regretted it as soon as I walked down the iale Long story short I broke it off and it started getting ugly. We had split visitation and one day he called at 10:30 at night and said I will never see him again.............DEVISTATED! I fought 4 years to get him back through our wonderful court system and won. Another tid bit is he raped his own sister and would rape me. Scary huh.. I am still dealing with that and I am away. Needless to say it takes a ton of money to go to court and bills are out the wazzooo! Attorney and court cost are so outrageous I cannot begin to tell you and everything that comes with it travel, time off work.....STRESS. But, I got my son. Second is October 15 2004 a drunk driver ran us off the road and from that I have had five surgeries. Tow shoulder surgeries and three hip surgeries and a whole hip replacement at 30 years of age......... But, I am here! The man had insurance and we are battle ling for our share of hospital and time off work and a ton of pain and suffering.......Not being there for so many things I can never take back! Well, attorney said ok he has 30,000 for this and that's the insurance limit and ours is 100,000 does anyone know that that's nothing for all the surgeries and that is what we get total!!!!!!! We are going to lose that house we live in and still not able to pay for anything! We have maxed out everything to battle to get my son and now my surgery to get back so I have this new hip for a longer time............. PLEASE God help me. Stupid thing is I have looked at my insurance to see if I would not be around what I could get for my family...STUPID! What are we going to do? I know there is positive but the thing is it's pushed behind all of this stuff. My husband who is so dear to me is so depressed and me well I am on a roller coaster ride that is making me sick! [email protected] if you would like to email me and here as well. I am so down what is there I can do but lose it all! Sitting here crying hardly can see to type! Family so maxed out as well helping which is another embarrassment! So sad Melissa

I do feel for your situation and will pray for you. This comes from the child of a parent who committed suicide... your family is not better off getting what they can for you - this is indeed a stupid (your word above) and selfish thought on your part... what do you have to lose? your house, your car, material things you will always have Christ and will not lose him I do not know of anything more important than that, you also have your family and they you. Maybe you need to look into a different atty. My brother wa**** by a car at a young age and the state insurance fund picked up his medical bills when they exceeded the insurance limits. His bills were hundreds of thousands, approaching a million $. GodBless! Jen

MELISSA- I know words are not enough comfort right now for you- you are steadily falling down and from what - I am not sure. BUT GOD DOES. I just read your post aloud to my husband- we just got in from the Weds night services - He immediately said PRAYER, and I re-iterate DIVINE intervention kiddo. Place your cares ALL OF THEM MELISSA, on the Lord let him carry you and your family through this storm, storms are meant to strengthen us HOW you say- they do. TRUST Do you have a home church that you are attending regularly? Are you seeking Gods word daily? It's not enough that you are asking for prayer, you need someone to pray with you- intercede on your behalf and take your burden to Gods throne of grace! This speaks to me loudly that you are desperate for some relief, I know I am not able to help you in the financial aspect BUT GOD CAN DO ALL THINGS if you seek ye first the Kingdom of God, Knock, and if he does not answer KEEP KNOCKING MELISSA. Seek to find, HE PROMISES us in Matthew 7:7-8 that whosoever seekth and knocked and asking- DO NOT ASK AMISS but with a humble heart, expecting that God will follow through with His promises in prayer and supplication. Read His word aloud and pray - Claim Him as your own. Have you asked Jesus into your life? Did you take that back from Him by doing things on your own without His leading? I am not a counselor but I do know My Savior on a personal walk - He is standing waiting for you to ask Him - NOT TELL Him Not sure how you came into the weight management message board, but I do beleive that all things work together to the good that love God, and to those who are called according to HIS purpose. ( Romans 8:28 ) I know that the Lord has your life planned out to the good, it might be that this storm needs to pass with your utmost dedication to Him in servanthood and trust. Obedience is the key to finding Gods will for your life. I feel like I am preaching here - and not to you- actaully to myself, as I need help in leaning closer to Him and his grace to carry me through my storm also... Where's your Bible? Where's your Pastor or his wife? You need a prayer chain and divine intercessory as you pull yourself out of WOE and depend on Him, help those who are walking in His light to bring you back into it kiddo. Remember Job? He lost EVERYTHING - yep all his children, flocks, home everything and his friends were telling him things that helped build himstrong ( even though it appeared they were against His God) through the storm in his life- even his wife told him to curse God, GET BACK INTO GODS WORD MELISSA. I love you as Christ loved you when he died for your sins, Lord I ask that you touch Melissa's heart right now while she is reading this and prompt her to your word and guide her into your WAY of ministering to her needs - Lord I pray you forgive her her sins, as she may humble to ask this of you and I know that you are 'just' and 'good' because you have promised to forgive her of these things - help her detach from the stronghold that has encompassed her soul away from your light and draw her closely to your side Father. Lord I also know that in your word you have promised not to put more on us than we are able to bear- and with that promise you promise a way out when we are deflated as such, please Lord I ask that you be reminded of your Word and your promise and help Melissa to move forward in your light- to seek for Your will and not that of human restraint. Christ name in Jesus I pray Amen, Good night Melissa. Brenda

Prayers being sent your way.. i so know what you mean by a wicked man, my first husband was like that to, but the thing with him was not only did he beet me but he alowed my mother to take my son for more than three years, i fought so hard for all those years to get my son back and when i went in front of the judge he was so mad at both my mother and my exhusband, i had to be my own attorney cause no attorney would take me i was a "welfare" case as they so eloquently put it.. that was over 15 years ago, i got to raise my son and watch him graduate this past year and wow did i love that not just because of the fact it was me who helped my son graduate but the knowledge that it was God who helped me through it all. it Was God who just now helped me get my ssi, not only have i had a bad car wreck but i wasn't able to work due to it since 1998 and i finaly got my disability after all these years, but it was all God, He was there beside me and my husband(my now husband). i sure do know about trials and strugles, my second husband had been cheating on me since the time of our marriage and i found that out over 7 years ago so i went through a second divorce.. But God had better plans for me He gave me this wonderful husband now my third husband and he is a treasure and i know it was God it couldn't have been anyone else, i had been so dead all those years until i gave myself to God two years ago, i thought that death was the answer until the day i said "God i cant do this alone i need you, i need your strength and i need your love" and God responded with an urgency, sometimes it doesn't happen as fast as we want like i said that was two years ago and i finaly got my first ssi check this month, but it is all in Gods timing, maybe God would like you to be in a better house, maybe God wants you to know your loved by the things He has done for you, im not sure what God has in store for you but know this, it will change your life for the better and in that journey you may have many more doubts, but you will know without a shadow of a doubt that God loves you. I started looking at things differently, like did you know that lady bugs have red legs?? i didn't know till one day i accualy took the time God gave me to just sit there and look at the lady bug, and trust me it wasn't a good day for me, but i remember the excitement that i got from know God made that, and if God gave that bug such a beautiful "outfit" what is He doing for me.. and i surenderd again that day. Im not goiing to say it will be easy but i will say you will know you are truely loved by God when you alowe Him to love you.. I sure hope i didn't bable to much, God bless you and know that prayers are being sent your way Hugs Paula

I cannot imagine the Hell you have been through with all that has occurred. I can say that God understands every single pain you are experiencing. Hold onto His Words. He says He will never leave you nor forsake you. He is your Rock and your Salvation. He loves you with an everlasting love. Trust Him for the outcome of these situations, including your financial dilemmas. I will pray for you as you work through these challenges. Hugs, Trish

Hi Melissa, I just sent you a long email. I am praying for you. Please do not be embarrassed. We all have seasons in our lives that we need help with. Please do not entertain any more of those "stupid" thoughts. Take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ! God gave you this life and He has a plan for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you! Jesus died on the cross just for YOU!! He loves you and so do we here at OH. Hugs, Robin

Sometimes it is so easy for us to say God will make a way. Expecially when we are not the one who needs the WAY MADE. But the thing is Melissa God will make away when there seems to be no way. He knows what you have need of. He will not put more on you than you can handle. Just think he must think you are mighty strong to place you in this trial you are in. I know that it seems you will not make it. But remember you can do all things through Christ who gives you strength. Also if God be for you who can be against you, and one more you are strong in the Lord and the power of HIS MIGHT! You are in my prayers!!!!