BMI over 100 :(

OOOPPss -- today is my 9 month anniversary! (please forgive the typo) deb

(((((((((((((((((((((HIJACK DEB)))))))))))))))))) Are my eyes deceiving me??????????????????????? The last I knew you were down -180lbs NOT 190!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Awsome for you girl!!! Congrats!!! Your double Century is just around the corner.!!! Carmella

Hi Lori!!!! I am so glad you have decided to stop under that ! I have a very high BMI also and I often feel the same way you do. The great news is that you are in the right place . If it were not for these boards and the SPECIAL SMOres here I would still be under the too. I am unable to get around also unless I have help and to get to my dr appts, I am in a wheelchair ( Can you imagine the workout the poor soul gets trying to move me around a HUGE hospital!) Anyhow, please feel free to read my profile and email me anytime!!! And dear... one more thing, you are not a freak of nature... especially here... you are one more SMO in a group of fluffy SMOres. YUMMY!!! That makes me hungry!!! SipeleK

I know what you mean by feeling bad about the poor person pushing me around in a wheelchair. It was a nice lady and I still dont know how she pushed all 638 lbs of me!

Hi Lori, I am glad you decided to come out and talk. I know how depressing it can be when you reach a certain point weight-wise and you wonder how you could have gotten yourself into that place and how you are ever going to get out of it. I know you are sad, but this is the time to grab the bull by the horns, so to speak, and take charge of your life again. WLS has done wonders for me, and for many others, I am sure. You are by no means a freak of nature; you're a beautiful woman. Like Margaret said, we chat in the BMI over 50 chat room virtually every night... it is usually around 9 pm Eastern time, so I guess that would be 6 pm California time. Hope to see you there some time, and please don't give up on yourself!! Take Care, Tanja

Lori, If you are a freak, then you are the most beautiful freak I have ever seen! I know exactly how you feel. I did not weigh as much, but I did have a BMI of 76.5. It is now 54.something!! LOL I lived my life afraid of going places, meeting peeps and being embarassed. I hated my life. But I slowly came to love me. I relaly don't know how, but the love of God really made see myself as "worthy to be loved". So, after that love fest went on for a few years [ ], I decided to have surgery for a variety of reasons. And I really feel alot better. To say i don't get depressed though, would be untruthful. My journey will be long and tough, and i will have times of doubt, but God is and has been there for me, when i am ready to hear. You will be in my prayers and on my mind. Let me know if I can be of help in any way. P.S. I don't usually 'preach', but you are hurting and I wanted to reach out to you in the way I know. I not mean to offend anyone. Toodles, Reneé

your too kind Renee! That pic is a few yrs old and my sister is into photography so I look way better and fixed up (no glasses, make-up and over 100 lb less then!)

Hey Lori, I want to applaud you for going to the doctor. That's a positive step and one that took a lot of courage. Have you thought about trying an in-patient program? I think sugery is ultimately your best bet, but an in-patient program could help you regain your mobility so that you can get around a bit better and exercise. My highest weight was 571 -- statistically, not too much less than you weigh now. I think the biggest barrier for me in helping myself was the depression. It was huge, bigger than my physical body, and it killed all of my energy. I found a therapist and got on Paxil. Despite what Tom Cruise thinks, it's good stuff, and I reccomend it. You're taking important steps now. They may be baby steps, but it doesn't matter how small they are as long as you're moving forward. E-mail me whenever you need to.

Hi Rebecca, Yes mobility is a major struggle for me as you can imagine. I do need to try and do at least some exercise like chair arobics and such as i get basically no exercise. Just walking a few steps across the room or to the bathroom is killing me now!

One more thing -- you're definitely not the only one. Check out these profiles: http://www.obesityhelp.com/morbidobesity/members/profile.php?N=H982614091 http://www.obesityhelp.com/morbidobesity/members/profile.php?N=C1060119648 http://www.obesityhelp.com/morbidobesity/members/profile.php?N=W1029266563 http://www.obesityhelp.com/morbidobesity/members/profile.php?N=H982614091 The first one is for a man who started out weighing 800 lbs. His BMI was 120. He weighs 257 pounds now. I'm sure he could give you some good advice. All the people in these profiles started out weighing more than you do now. You are not alone, and you can and will beat this.