BMI over 100 :(

Hi I kind of a lurker here but after finally going to the Dr last week and finding out I am 638 lbs!!! I am soooo depressed and sad. How did I do this to myself and why can't I stop? I have been putting off going for almost 2 yrs now and have gained almost 50 lbs. I'll tell you it was no small feat just physically getting there and couldn;t without the help of my sister and a friend. Is there ayone else out there as big as me or close? I feel so alone and like a freak of nature right now. Sorry to vent like this but just wanted to know if there are any of you that are or have been as heavy as I am now. Thanks Lori

Lori, You should know that you are not a "freak of nature"!! And you are NOT alone!! We are all here for you when you need us.. We all have different weights but we all know the heart ache of being SMO.. Welcome to the board! Amber M

Thanks for the kind reply Amber

Welcome to the board Lori! If there is anything you need or you just want to talk or vent, I am here for you. If you want to exchange phone numbers just email me. ~Sherri~

Lori, you are NOT alone! Come here anytime. We all know the pain and heartache of being SMO. ((((((((LORI))))))) Huggs, Ruth

HI LORI I AM SO GLAD YOU CAME OUTTA LURKER STATUS WE ARE ALL HERE TO SUPPORT EACH OTHER PLEASE FEEL FREE TO COME VENT AT ANY TIME WE R HERE FOR YOU I THINK WE CAN ALL RELATE TO YOUR PROBLEMS IN ONE WAY OR ANOTHER. LOVE CANDY

Ok Lori! Enough of that putting yourself down. I am looking at your picture now and you are a beautiful lady. Im sorry you cant see that. I know you can feel that way though because it is you living in your body and not us. I just want you to know that you are by no means alone. I am fat for sure and even though we are not the same size I can feel the pain and embarrasement too. Size really doesnt matter especially on our board here. You have come to the right one. You can cry,vent,whine(I am the queen of that so thats taken lol), yak, even b$@$, and we are there and will even put our two cents in with ya lol. We love to be with ya all the way. I dont know what I would do without my support on here and they are pushing me all the way to the end of this slow ass journey and they are there at the end smiling.So stop with that lurking girl and get with us. We chat in the over 50 BMI chatroom everynight around nine. We have a good time and will love to have ya!!! Hugs Margaret

Hi Lori, I think I understand what you're going thru. When I had my first surgery consult and saw that I was over 500 lbs., it was all I could do to not start bawling my eyes out! I'm sure the dr. noticed as did my sis. It's important for me not to get into the blame game of how could I let this happen to myself, I just have to deal... it happened. I had lapband surgery 3 months ago and and have lost 65 lbs. I noticed a big difference after just 40 lbs. I can finally move again. I was living in a prison, couldn't go anywhere but work. Just making it to the consult was an ordeal because it was in the hospital (not a long walk now, but that day, I thought I would die) Just know that it does get better. On Sunday, I watched my nephew at soccer (didn't need to sit), visited with my dad, went shopping, got my car washed, took out the garbage and went to the laundromat. Most people would think that was an ordinary day, but all of that used to take me a month to do! Every one of those is a major achievement! (I'm sure you can relate) I no longer have to worry so much if I can do something (I still do some times but I'm working on it) I still have a long way to go, but I feel like I have a new life! Good luck on your journey Steff

Thanks so much for your words of encouragement. Its comforting to know there are nice people out there who truly understand what my life is like and what I am going through every day being like this trapped in this enormous prision of my body. Lori

greetings lori and welcome to the 50+ board we're glad to have you join us here. i've certainly had those "freak of nature" thoughts about myself in the past. today is my 8 month anniversary since i had surgery. on the day of surgery, i weighed 463 and had a bmi of 66.4. eight months later, i weigh 273, and my bmi is 39.2. so please know there is a light at the end of the tunnel -- and don't think you are alone. as you will find here, there are many people with similar problems and situations, and this is wonderful place to find them and take comfort in the fact that you are NOT alone in this struggle. best to you. deb -190