Happy With Your Decision to Have Surgery?

After a big weight loss without surgery, I am thinking about going forward with it again.

I'm 30 years old. I lost 110 pounds last year, and was able to get down to 340 with diet and exercise. I was on a huge high.

I have been gaining my weight back since September and am back up to 395.

I have tried Weigh****chers and logging and exercising again... But I'm not seeing any results.

I don't think I had the dedication I had initially.

I see a therapist regularly and she has had RNY bypass. She thinks I should seriously consider doing it.

My friends and family aren't on board with that idea, really.

I'm at a crossroads.

I'm tired of being this big, but I'm scared to lose friends over the decision. Their biggest concerns are the complications.

I read an interesting study/article on some of The Biggest Loser competitors gaining much of their weight back, and it was totally relatable.

Would you do it again?

I totally would. I've had minor issues, but they've been my own doing--constipation, eating too fast--things like that. I lost 100 lbs on a Dr-monitored VLCD, but I gained it back plus more. I had surgery in October of 2013 and I've lost 160 lbs. I've maintained the same weight within about 5 lbs for about a year now. That has never happened before as I was always gaining weight. 

Do your research. The book WLS For Dummies is actually really good. Contact your insurance and find out if it's covered and which procedures are covered. Keep an open mind. There are three main procedures--RNY, VSG and DS. Do not fear or reject any of them until you have a thorough understanding of the risks and rewards of each and how they relate to your specific situation. 

Find all of the programs in your area and attend their orientations if they have them or schedule consultations with the surgeons. Don't be afraid to shop--this is for your health. Ask questions. Keep a list of questions as they occur to you. Ask one or two of your friends or family members to go with you to an orientation or consult. My husband was hesitant and went to an orientation and consult with me and felt a lot better. If they're still not on board, fine. You do not need their permission. 

A lot of people are afraid of the complications from surgery and while serious complications can happen, they're pretty rare. Staying morbidly obese comes with a guarantee of complications. Which would you rather have?

Jen

You have to do what is best for you, not what others want you to do. The "people pleasing" behavior is what helped most of us reach the stage of obesity. Take care of YOU!! If you lose friends, they were not really your friends, anyway.

Yes, I would do it again in a heartbeat. I am 7.5 years post-RNY and healthier (and more active) than I have ever been. WLS gave me my life back.

I would do it again in a heartbeat. I have lost 165 pounds in 14 months. Having surgery is the best thing I have ever done for myself. I'm not just healthier now. I'm happier. I actually smile and mean it, not fake it. Good luck with making your decision. 

Oh hells yeah I would do this **** again! No way on Gods green earth would I have made it this far & still keep going. Mind you the surgery is only a tool. You still have to work thru the head stuff, you still have to watch what you eat, but the surgery for me, hit the reset button for my body & made it possible for me to lose the weight & keep it off.

Do your research & do a little soul searching while you're at it. This surgery is for you & your health & your friends should support you, but be prepared if they don't. Some of it is just plain fear & ignorance & as screwed up as it sounds, sometimes you'll have to reassure them that its still the same ole you, just smaller, after all he's operating on your stomach, not your head, he's not changing your personality, but you might find yourself changing as you go thru the process.

Good luck in whatever you choose to do. 

I just had surgery last week so I guess I don't have the experience to really answer you yet - nothing happened in surgery to make me think it was a bad decision but I don't have all the results I'm hoping for yet to show it was a great decision!

but I did want to say I can relate to where you are - loosing then gaining - harder to loose and more depressing each time.  I feel lucky to have this option, and the hope of it going well.

i wish you the best.

I had my bypass 09/09 and do it again in a heartbeat. I did have complications (fungal infection in the lungs and pancreatitis).I have my life back. There are things I can do now that was unheard of 7 years ago (roller coasters,  doing 5ks, etc)

You have to do what's best for you, your health, and your family.  Nothing else matters. 

As far as losing friends ,  if they get b*tchy and distant,  they're really not your friends.  True friends will support you no matter what.

Biggest Loser is so fake and unrealistic.  No body can do exercise for 6-8 hours of exercise a day. And they wouldn't have chiefs serving them meals.  They never learned basic nutrition and how to keep the weight off.

Without hesitation, I would do it again. 

You have to live with being fat, not your friends.  It's normal for them to be concerned about complications because all anyone seems to remember are the horror stories.  Yes, complications can happen.  They can happen in any type of surgery.  According to my surgeon, the risks for complications with a VSG are less than for gall bladder removal.

I'm glad to know that you're seeing a therapist and she supports WLS.  Keep in mind that they operate on our guts, not our heads.  Although the physical hunger may lessen or disappear, the head hunger remains a nasty piece of work.  We have to work on the issues that make us fat if we want to sustain long term weight loss.

I think everyone on OH has tried dieting.  Diets work while you're on them.  Then you revert to eating in the ways that made you fat and the weight returns.  When I finally decided to have WLS, I knew it meant changing my eating habits for the rest of my life.  No more daily junk food.  What I've found is that you can adopt new habits and keep them over time if you set your mind to it.  I don't always succeed, but I would say that I'm on plan 90% of the time.

Without WLS, statistics say that 95% will gain all or more of the weight back that you may lose.  WLS gives you the advantage of taking the weight off quickly and gives you that motivating jump start to hopefully stay on track.  If you do have surgery, commit yourself to being completely dedicated over the first year as that's when you'll have the most significant weight loss.  It slows down over time for a myriad of reasons.

Good luck with whatever you decide 

I'm only 13 months out from surgery so I might not be the best to ask since I may still bei n the honeymoon stage but yes, I would do it again. But you have to do it for YOU, not for anyone else. I had a big weight lose of around 100 pounds about 8 years ago and put it all back on plus about 50 more. And I fooled myself into thinking over the last 4 years or so that I was okay with how I looked, and I tried to love myself, I really, really tried.

But then I had a health scare - I already had cancer at age 25, but that type of cancer runs heavily in my family so genetics you know? But in December 2014 I had another cancer scare that was unrelated to the genetic kind that runs in my family and my Gynecological Oncologist basically told me if I didn't lose weight and soon I would be getting cancer for sure and it really scared the **** out of me because I was only 32 and I love my husband and want to live for a really long time with him. It was truly the first time I thought of the surgery.

Because of that I had the surgery for ME and no one else. I researched it like crazy. My family was not on board, but my husband was and my best friend was. And I found this site. With that support I was good to go.

The RNY is a tool though - the first 12-18 months is meant to teach you things you will use the rest of your life. How to use portion control and weigh your food, eating protein first and the rules you will need to follow the rest of your life. It hasn't been super easy but honestly I haven't broken a single one of the rules once because I want to learn how to follow them without thinking about it. And I kind of have - I went on vacation last week and brought bags of beef jerkey I had pre measured out that were perfect snacks for me to eat just in case there was nothing to eat at the meals. I do that everywhere I go - just in case. I needed to use those bags twice in 4 days I was gone. I was able to eye my portions roughly to be what I should eat because of what I've learned in the last 13 months. I came home and I had lost weight while I was gone.

Sorry to pontificate. I just feel strongly about this. If YOU feel you are ready then don't let other people stop you. But if you aren't ready then do not do it. Only do it for you, no one else. It's hard but worth it. I was 377 pounds. I'm now 200 pounds and I truly am happy with how I look but the best thing is my health has improved so much.

Good luck!

Yes I would do it again. I lost weight many times on my own, but this is the first time I have the confidence that I can keep it off. Not to say it won't take work, it is work...but well worth it.