Making the mental shift as you lose

cheapskate
on 7/12/15 9:12 am
RNY on 03/30/15

I just can't do it. I can't bring myself to buy/wear smaller clothes. I have lost 70 pounds, so it isnt anything to sneeze at. How did you make that mental shift? I am working my program/tool exactly like I should be. It is working, but when did you wake up and find yourself able? Is there anything you did to help you on your journey?

AmyDee123
on 7/12/15 2:01 pm - Lutz, FL
RNY on 06/12/15

I'm in the same boat.  Every place is having massive sales right now.  The H&M in our mall has dresses that are 5 and 7 bucks.  My husband wants me to buy some in a medium so I have some stuff to wear later.  Better to buy them now at 5 bucks than next year when they are back to 30 bucks.  He is right but I can't bring myself to do it.

LapBand Weight 460 (2006) | Panni Removal Weight 200 (2008) | 3rd kid (2009)
Revision to RNY Weight 355 (June 2015)

    

karasmom
on 7/12/15 4:24 pm

I look at myself in the mirror and still see the person I was before I lost 129 lbs.  

        
selhard
on 7/12/15 8:28 pm - MN
RNY on 11/26/12

Getting used to the new-you is a process.  Change is hard. Adjusting is hard. Letting go is hard.  My department store dressing room three-way mirror experience was about six-eight months post-op.  I stood motionless in front of that mirror looking at my "war-torn body" wondering why, why, why.  I couldn't bring myself to buy a single piece of clothing. A few days later, I went back to the same store, the same dressing room and ended up with a couple pieces because my DH was along and helped choose.  Advice:  find someone whose opinion you trust until you are off and running on your own.  Baby steps.

Gwen M.
on 7/13/15 7:33 am
VSG on 03/13/14

Lots and lots of therapy.  Lots of exercise to increase body awareness.  And looking at pictures of myself with other people (i.e., having other people in the pictures) really helps.  

VSG with Dr. Salameh - 3/13/2014
Diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder and started Vyvanse - 7/22/2016
Reconstructive Surgeries with Dr. Michaels - 6/5/2017 (LBL & brachioplasty), 8/14/2017 (UBL & mastopexy), 11/6/2017 (medial leg lift)

Age 42 Height 5'4" HW 319 (1/3/2014) SW 293 (3/13/2014) CW 149 (7/16/2017)
Next Goal 145 - normal BMI | Total Weight Lost 170

TrendWeight | Food Blog (sort of functional) | Journal (down for maintenance)

bulldog76ss
on 7/13/15 8:21 am - OH

Boy can I feel your pain.  I had the same issues for quite a while.  I was losing so fast that I had to do something.  I first purchased on line smaller sizes and found that the new clothes would start falling off me in 2 weeks.  I went from a 74 waist to a current 46 waist in under 2 years.  Anyway, one of my solutions was Goodwill.  I would stop in once a week taking my clothes that were to big and purchasing ones that fit.  I normally could find a pair of Levi, Wrangler or Lee jeans in my current size for $3 to $6 dollers.  As I got smaller moving from a 7X shirts to current 2X became easier to get.  Also, I use Ebay a lot to help lower the cost.  Anyway having clothes that fit, especially when you work in an office environment and deal directly with clients can be stressful when you are worrying about your pants falling down :).  I always felt that the joy of getting smaller far out weighed the clothes issue.  Hang in there and good luck!

    
TheNewT
on 7/13/15 9:01 am
VSG on 08/04/14

Pictures, pictures, pictures! It helps me to put them side by side to see the changes. I know darn well that 89 pounds gives you major body changes, but heckfire if I see it looking in the mirror everyday. I need to make the comparison.

        

Linda L.
on 7/13/15 12:50 pm
RNY on 02/17/15

It is an adjustment....a HUGE adjustment!  I have lost almost 90 pounds and my clothes were ridiculously large on me.  My mom MADE me go to the mall and buy two pairs of shorts and two shirts that fit.  It felt odd to me at first, wearing clothing that fit.  I have found a wonderful therapist and she has helped guide me through.  It's a journey, a process and their is no right or wrong way to do it.  In order to feel more present in my new body I started taking my measurements every other week.  So if the scale didn't change I would notice that I lost inches.  I started to revel in the things that I could enjoy again. Taking a bubble bath, relaxing on the hammock!  For work I use a sight called Gwennie Bee.  It is a plus size clothing rental company on line.  You put dresses in your closet and they send them to you.  I pay $35 a month and I can have one item out at a time. The shipping is free.  The great part is that as you lose weight you can change the sizes of the clothing in your "closet".  You got this!!! I hope my suggestions help!

    
Laura in Texas
on 7/13/15 2:17 pm

I did not get rid of ANYTHING until I had lost 100 pounds. As a reward for myself, I redid my closet. I tore out everything, painted it, and put in a beautiful new closet system. No way was I putting those old frumpy clothes back in there. I finally donated my old clothes and was ready to do some shopping when I could see how truly empty my closet was.

Is part of it because you are a "cheapskate" as your profile name implies? I shopped at Goodwill. I went once a month. I always had a black pair of pants, a khaki pair, and jeans that fit. Shirts can last a lot longer. I bought pants without pockets because they could be easily taken in on the sides by me instead of seeing a tailor. I drilled new holes in my belts to make them last longer. I was very thrifty. At the 14 month I reached maintenance and did not have to worry about replacing my wardrobe all the time.

It's a long process mentally. I got through it without professional help, but if you need to talk to someone, you should. Good luck!!

Laura in Texas

53 years old; 5'7" tall; HW: 339 (BMI=53); GW: 140 CW: 170 (BMI=27)

RNY: 09-17-08 Dr. Garth Davis

brachioplasty: 12-18-09 Dr. Wainwright; lbl/bl: 06-28-11 Dr. LoMonaco

"May your choices reflect your hopes and not your fears."

NinaCanDOit
on 7/13/15 5:15 pm
RNY on 06/27/14

I shopped my closet for a long time before I had to really start looking elsewhere for clothing.  I had a lot of good quality basic pieces all the way down to about an xl/18 or so.  When the time came, and to supplement here an there, I looked to ebay and upscale thrift and consignment shops.  I always try things on if possible, and if not I go by measurements (and request them if they aren't in the listing).  I didn't really have to go shopping until I needed something for a wedding in May, and by then I was a little shell shocked by what size I was purchasing.  I have since gotten used to the shopping part and I've learned to always ask the attendants/sales associates for help (be friendly let them know what you need - I'm looking for basics for work, I'm in art teacher so the fabrics have to wash well and I'm trying to take advantage of your sales! - this got me a sweater, a cardigan and a jacket for under $40 at BR last week).

I still haven't wrapped my head completely around the size thing yet.  I am still amazed that I fit places, especially seating, but it's getting better.  The gym I go to has mirrors along the walls and sometimes when I'm doing cardio machines I find myself kind of comparing myself with other people, for reference, to see if how I see them matches the reflection and their relative size to me.  I find that I'm getting better and better at gauging my size relative to those around me, and hence I feel like that is helping me get a better sense of physical myself.  It sounds much more complicated than it is, but it is helping. 

HW - 392 * CW - 200 * * * Lost - 192, To Goal - 40

"almost there,...keep going,...stay focused,...eyes on the prize" - the guy at my gym

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