My mind is whirling - so many questions for this group

I'm wondering about life as a new post op. Yeah, I'm getting waaay ahead of myself, but I can't stop the gears in my head from spinning.

Right now I've got mobility issues and get tired easily doing chores. Due to a lack of support at home, I'm considering renting my own apartment so that I only have to care for myself, not 2 others who are very lazy. Will I have trouble taking care of myself? I can arrange for help if needed, but am wondering how much I may need - I'm sure more than a lightweight. How long a period of weakness might I expect. (Yes, I know, we are all different)

Also, how flexible will I be? (Can I wipe my own butt?) Right now the caboose is large enough that I have to twist around, and I'm wondering how well I will twist post-op.

And how soon can I be back in the pool?

I'm sure I'll have many more questions.....

I was just reading through your blog. Oh, Patty. I feel for you!! If you can afford your own place, I say go for it!! I did not need any help post-op. My kids were small when I had surgery so I did need help with them, but I had protein shakes on hand and could take care of myself.

I was 311 at surgery and able to wipe my own butt, but I remember my surgeon saying to have food tongs on hand in case I had trouble reaching back there. Maybe a nurse could come check on you once a day in the beginning to see if you need anything?????

Losing weight will not solve your personal problems, but I think it will give you the strength to figure out what is best for YOU. Stop worrying so much about everyone else and focus on yourself. You have a lot of living left to do. Figure out how to make the best of it!!

What is best for me is to work become the butterfly I want to be.

I believe that the big key is to let go of the demon of co-dependence. Back when I went to a few OA meetings, a woman told me that I'd never be successful with controlling my weight until I worked on my co-dependence issues. At that point I was offended by her words. I wanted just to lose the damn weight ASAP, so didn't want to do the other work on issues first.

Time has proved her right. But I'm here to do both at the same time. And stop isolating.

My assignment from my shrink (who I see today) is to reach out. You guys are a part of that. We who have been SMO really understand.

My cousin Jan from Elko NV is going to come and help me for a week or so. She can fly intp PDX, which is were my surgery will be.

I'm much newer out than Laura, but I also started at 311 and really didn't need much help.  My son walked the dog (because he's a puller) but I was able to take care of all of my personal and household needs without much trouble at all.  I was given a 6 week waiting period before the pool.

Let me tell you, I got tired easily too.  Everything was hard, you know?  From putting shoes/socks on to just all-around getting around.  A short trip to the mall had actual physical consequences in the form of sore legs and feet and usually a headache to go with it.  Now?  Everything seems easier.  IS easier.  I don't think I fully realized how small my world had become or how limited I was at my highest weight.  Taking charge of myself and my health and loving myself enough to "get right" was the best thing I ever did. 

I never thought about making my world smaller.  I totally have.  I can't wait to get beyond these walls.  What a realization.  Thank you AngryViking!!

Hi Patty and welcome.  I am so glad that you are reaching out -- and I hope you find the support and strength you need to get the life you want and deserve.  

I started at 344 and I was able to do most everything for myself after surgery.  It was nice having my husband around for support however, so if you have someone in your life that is supportive and helpful, but all means, let them!  

I was also worried about the butt-wiping thing.  After my c-section, it was a good two weeks before I could twist and do that myself.  However, after the RNY (lap), I had no problems at all.  I was 317 the day of surgery.

I wasn't able to swim or take tub baths for 6 to 8 weeks.

:-)  Btw, my home state is Oregon.  I was born in Coos Bay on the southern Oregon coast.  My mama still lives there.  I also have family in Eugene ... well really, all over the state -- and some family I don't like much in Elko, NV.  LOL.  

My Elko cousin grew up in Portland and went to OSU - LOL! 

I had my partners at home with me but, I could have taken care of myself.  It was nice not to have to.. but not necessary!

Oooo! Jealous of partner(s) to help! What a bennie!

Chores?, hell no, you will definitely not feel like doing anything in the weeks after surgery, you'll be too busy healing & trying to get your naps & protein/water/short walks to get the gas moving etc. I live by myself & what I did was all my chores b4 surgery so that afterwards the house would still be clean, clothes clean, litter boxes clean & I'd have all my food etc that I needed in the weeks after surgery.

I didn't have a problem taking care of myself & only took a week off from work. As far as reaching back there, frankly my system was out of whack so I didn't have much in the way of bm, after all I was on liquids for a month prior to surgery & on liquids a couple of weeks after surgery, so not much came out "back there", & remember pain killers can be a wonderful thing!, it was definitely used after surgery, but I'd sometimes would hold my stomach getting up & down off the toilet. It definitely helped & made twisting/bending over much less painful. Good luck on your surgery! BTW I was 366 when I started & was in my 340's I think at the time of surgery.